Nope on the Slope (ONC 2024)

Chapter 4: Cross Country Skiing (Levi's POV)

Orion Strauss was right this morning when he called me jealous. The worst part about it is I am jealous of my own cousin, the very cousin I've treated like a brother for years. It kills me that Kelsi likes Justin, what's even worse now is she's kissed him and wants more.

They always want more of Justin. That's how all the females at our school are. Justin isn't a bad person, he saved my life when I was eleven. I fell through the ice on the frozen lake in my backyard. He pulled me out with all his strength and we both had to go to the hospital for hypothermia. The fact we are both still alive is short of a miracle.

But now my best friend, Kelsi, is involved. The one female I thought he'd never touch or get close to, he finally did. I miscalculated.

I've known for a while now that Kelsi was more than a friend to me but we made that pact and I'm a man of my word. An oath is an oath, and to break it is to be a liar. I've longed to break it and kiss Kelsi and tell her that I have these feelings for her. But where do I start, should I start, and then the oath kicks in and sets me right as rain.

I try to be a good friend to her. It wasn't a lie that I'd always be there for her. It wasn't a lie that I cared about her deeply. Stuffing these feelings down for years hasn't been good for me. In fact, it has made me bitter and angry.

I continue the drive toward the old skiing trails. I decide to start Kelsi off small and give cross-country skiing a try. I really am not in the mood to prepare her for the upcoming ski trip but again, I'm a man of my word. My father taught me that a man's word is binding and to break it is to break faith. There's some wisdom in there I think.

"Levi, are you okay? I'm sorry if having you wait in the car was awkward but you did offer." I hate that we are having this conversation at all. It wouldn't be necessary if I didn't sort of like her. It wouldn't be necessary if Justin weren't my cousin.

"I chose to wait in the car. You're right I did offer. Can we not talk about Justin right now? What's done is done. I know you like him, and there's no changing your mind on that."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kelsi crosses her arms as we attempt to get out of the car.

"I'm not looking to start a fight, Kelsi. I'm just saying you're dead set on liking Justin is all."

"Why would you want to change my mind anyway?" My cheeks turn red, I can feel the heat rising to the surface. I thought this was a slight crush but it might be more than I bargained for.

"I'm not saying I want you to change your mind about Justin. He does come with a reputation and a warning label. Because he's my cousin I'm obligated to be honest with you about what he does to girls."

I look away from Kelsi so my blush can settle down before she notices. I'm sure she notices me staring at her lips from time to time. Does she want me to kiss her? Did I imagine her looking at mine too on those occasions when the tension between us hung in the air?

"Always the gentleman aren't you, Levi? Do you even know how to cross-country ski?"

I close the car door behind me and head to the little lodge where the cross-country skis are kept in a small log cabin.

"More than you do. Unless you want to teach me instead." I use my forearm to suggest that she takes the reigns for our lesson today.

"Point taken. I'll follow your lead oh wise ski instructor."

We head into the lodge and Kelsi pulls out her purse to pay her fee. I push it away and pay for both of us. I haven't paid for Kelsi before, ever. I'm not sure why I decided to pay for her.

"Levi, you didn't have to do that."

But maybe I did. Now that Justin's playing fire with my best friend, maybe I should take a stand and let her know that I...

"Yeah, I did. I make way more money than you at my job. All you do is babysit. I get to make coffee for those college girls who over-tip because they think I'm..." I'd better not finish that sentence nothing good will come out of it.

"That think you're what?" She leans in as I help her put her skiing boots on. She sits down on the bench and I shove the boot onto her right foot. I use such force to press that boot against her heel.

"Nothing." I don't want to sound arrogant, especially to Kelsi. We're already on thin ice now that Justin is involved.

"That think you're hot? Because well...you kind of are, Levi. And about what you said earlier. You'd actually make a really great boyfriend. In case you ever wanted a girl's opinion."

"No, I didn't want any girl's opinion. Just yours. Nevermind. Let's start skiing."

Kelsi's cheeks get red. I've definitely crossed a line with her again. Something about coming back from break has turned me into a loon. I don't know if it's because I missed her so much, we were separated all of break. She went to Florida and changed her hair and became even more beautiful than she was before. I didn't even know she could do that.

I pick up Kelsi's skis and she holds my hand. She and I occasionally hold hands when the tension between us is strong. It's the only physical thing we ever give each other. She laces our fingers together. She's never laced our fingers together before, I rub my thumb over her knuckles like I did before.

We're the only people out on the trails and it's early evening. I can't fall for my best friend, anything past a crush is simply off the table. But what if we were on the table doing everything physical together? I try to wipe that thought of being all over Kelsi from my mind, but I can't help it. I want to hold her and kiss her. I let go of her hand instead.

"We'd better go. It's getting dark and I was hoping to show you the basics for an hour."

I give Kelsi a quick lesson on how to remove her boot from the ski. I show her how to use the pulls and after a while, she gets the hang of it. She glides slowly through the trails. Her long brown hair waving in the breeze as she glides. The lanterns for the forest trail come on and Kelsi turns back to show off her new moves to me. She falls into a nearby tree and her skis pop off. One flies in my direction and her hair gets caught in the branches.

I spring into action and remove my skis and gloves from my body. I expose my hands to the cold, and the frigid air strikes them instantly. Her hair is hard to remove from the branches. The first few strands break free and fall to the side of her face. I catch my eyes following the strands and her eyes find mine. Her breath and mine touch in midair. I put my hand on her chin, and she gasps slightly when I touch her.

"Levi, can you rescue the rest of my hair from the branches?" She says as her hand comes up to her face. She places her hand on mine, the one that's still holding her chin. We look like we're dating and we sit there for a minute lost in each other's gaze unsure of how to proceed.

"Yeah, in a minute." I look at her lips and she looks at mine. I'm too scared to bridge the gap between us.

"Levi, what if we kissed?" My cheeks turn red and our breath touches in the air again. My best friend has asked me the question I've always wanted to hear, but if it's a test and I answer wrongly then I'll make an ass of myself.

"We can't, Kelsi. I can't do that to Justin." And just like that, I've turned down the one chance I'll ever have to kiss Kelsi Long before graduation. We continue skiing and don't look at each other. The tension in the air is for other reasons, and among them are confusion and rejection. I've rejected the one person I never would have, but Justin's involved now and I can't do that to a family member no matter how much I want to.