The Treasure Island of Dr. McLean

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[there's an update to lewis' bio! go check it out, it actually aligns with this plot.]

*

"Last time on Total Drama: Revenge of The Island. . . the players went on an impromptu environmental cover up- er. . . 'clean up' challenge, and tried not to get a toxic make over like Dakota. Mike introduced us to Manitoba Smith, his most rugged and arrogant persona yet. Freak-zekiel had slightly more luck with the ladies than Human-zekiel, and Brick overcame his fear of the dark, to heroically save his former team. Which, in turn, made his current team give him the ol' heave hurl. . . makes you wanna reflect, don't it? Maybe with a cup of Chris McLean instant coffee."

As a coffee lover, Chris should've loved this. Yet, of course, it was a cheapskate branding attempt, so of course it tasted shit. "Bitter- better! Better. . . than the rest. Who will survive? Who will wish they didn't?"

"Me." I said, unenthusiastic.

"Find out, right now, on Total. . . Drama. . . Revenge of The Island!"

*

This past week, whenever Vito's been fronted, he's told me about little things he didn't like about the people I'm around. For example, he said that he didn't like how Chris only existed to criticize other people, and how Chef only acts intimidating to get his own way. . .

I mean. . . he's. . . kind of right.

It also didn't help I had to be put on a raft in the middle of the lake with the contestants. It was EXACTLY like season one, where Chris made me follow everyone around all the time, either like a lost little sheep, or a shepherd looking after said sheep. 

I groaned quietly, knowing I'd have to get used to this until the season ended. I sat down on the edge of the raft, grabbing a stick from nearby, and just started prodding at the water, as if it were gonna actually do something. After a few minutes of pure silence, except the occasional movement of water, an alarm clock tied to a buoy started ringing, waking everyone up.

"What? Where are we-?" Mike asked, glancing around in confusing. "Aw, no! Chris must have set us adrift after we went to sleep!" Zoey said, a small whine of annoyance in her voice. Scott thought for a second, before turning to her. "Yeah. . . wait. I- I don't remember anything after dinner." Cameron instantly widened his eyes. "Dinner! That's it!"

He turned his focus to Mike, explaining. "Turkey makes you sleepy, so. . . mutant turkey must have knocked us out cold. . . genius!" I raised a brow at Lightning, who was talking in his sleep. "Lightning wins the Super Bowl. . ." He snored, before speaking again. "Yeaaah!" Jo narrowed her eyes. "Wakey, wakey, muscle mouth!" She kicked him into the lake, which obviously woke him up.

"Wha-?! Where did the cabin go?" Scott began to panic, thinking of all the possible ways Fang could get to him. "Great, a- and now we're gonna be some stupid shark's dinner. . ." Mike, on the other hand, tried to cheer him up. "Oh, don't worry. He'll never find us in the middle of all this junk." I don't know why, exactly, we were surrounded by a bunch of crap that nobody wanted, but we were, so we had to deal.

"Oh, hey! Sweet hat!" Mike said, picking up a dark fedora from a chest of clothes. Of course, Manitoba fronted, which really wasn't great for me, considering the last time I saw him, I told him to mind his own fucking business, and to tell Ches and Svet to fuck off, too.

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