Not for a Single Second - [Elizabeth Olsen]

Chapter 35: Relationship Trouble

Why can't I say that I'm in love?
I wanna shout it from the rooftops
I wish that it could be like that
Why can't it be like that?
'Cause I'm yours

Secret Love Song – Little Mix (feat. Jason Derulo)

⚠️Trigger Warning: Angst⚠️

Y/N's POV

April 18th, 2022

Ever since Lizzie and I made love, I thought things would be better than what they already were. Sadly, I was wrong about that. Lizzie became so paranoiac about everything. When we would go outside, we couldn't hold hands, we needed to wear a cap and glasses at all times and, at some point, we just stopped going out together.

I still needed to go to work, and Lizzie has been preparing for the 'Multiverse of Madness' press tour, so we haven't spent much time together. Even when we were inside my loft, she wouldn't relax and when we would have sex, she would quickly get up and shower. There wasn't a single time she stayed with me. That made me feel as if she was disgusted by me.

I really didn't want to have a fight about this, but there are so many things on my head. For instance, she still hasn't talk to her team about making her breakup with Robbie public. I know I said I wouldn't pressure her, but now I can't enjoy being with my girlfriend or tell anyone I have one because of it.

Another thing, I know this type of relationship is new for Lizzie, but the commitment and love that has to be part of one, she knows how to show that very well. She has proven it to me multiple times before. I really don't understand why she has been so hostile with me lately and, to be honest, I don't know if I can handle it anymore.

Right now, I'm at the loft, playing with the guitar Lizzie gave me for my birthday while writing a couple of lyrics and chords. I've never been a big songwriter, but with all these feelings in my head and my heart, and not being able to share them, writing them down has been a great help.

Today we weren't supposed to stay at the loft either. I had planned a little visit to an art museum and after, I was taking Lizzie out dancing, so she could relax before leaving for the tour, but she had a meeting about it, and then she needed to have a fitting. She told me she was only going to be gone 2 hours, which turned into 5, and I ate lunch alone.

After she arrived, she went straight to the room to start packing all her outfits for the events and red carpets and didn't even acknowledge the fact that she didn't keep her promise of eating with me. She has been at it for another 3 hours and right now, I really don't want to talk to her.

"Alright, I'm think I'm done", Lizzie says while walking down the stairs and joining me on the couch. I just hum in response and continue playing some chords while whisper singing the words of my song. "What are these?", Lizzie inquires while taking away my notebook.

If I kept a list of every single second that I've lived
There's no way in the world
That my list would line up with yours

If I saw your top ten seconds
I wouldn't make an honorable mention
But if you need a temporary love
I'd be number one

"Are these lyrics? Or a poem from a broken heart?", Lizzie asks in a mocking tone, and I just snatch the notebook back before standing up with my guitar and placing them back in their place.

"They're just something I'm trying. It's nothing important", I say in an annoyed tone before sitting back on the couch. I didn't want to sound too cold, but I am really mad. Lizzie crawled closer to me and started to play with a few strands of hair that had fallen from my ponytail.