It Is Too Late

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Whatever the circumstances, Felix couldn't just let it go. He was certain that Hyunjin couldn't either. What they had, the time they spent together, the things they shared were too powerful and precious to be lost and forgotten in a few short months. Hyunjin is never going to leave Felix, he is just being moody and a drama queen. Right?

But Felix was in for a rude awakening.

He decided to go find Hyunjin in his apartment. Perhaps a direct approach in "their place", away from everyone else, where they have all these memories of shared moments in love and affection, would be more effective. He smiled to himself, taking the elevator from his apartment floor to Hyunjin's. As soon as the doors opened, he stepped out into the hallway, mentally preparing himself. How should he approach the raven haired to break his defences and make him yield to his - his Yongbok, his sunshine, his love - wishes? He had to be sweet and patient, bend his resistance and reclaim him fully. He can't risk to leave him open to potential advances from others. Someone could take an interest in Hyunjin - someone always takes an interest in him, he's a handsome man after all - and maybe Hyunjin would reciprocate, feeling "unattached" at the moment, but Felix can't let that happen. Felix should make it clear that Hyunjin doesn't have to look for love anywhere else because he already has it, with him. 

It eludes him - clearly - that he is contradicting himself, but Felix really has it all mixed up inside his head, doesn't he? Hyunjin's behaviour has completely thrown him off because Felix never expected that the other wouldn't immediately give in to him, his Yongbok's wishes. And he couldn't - or didn't want to - understand why.

Walking down the hallway, he heard a door open - it was Hyunjin's - and someone step out. His eyes widened. What was Minho doing here? He watched the sight before him, confused. He heard laughter - Hyunjin's - and whispering voices. However, he couldn't make out what they were saying. He stopped in his tracks and stood still, covered by the shadows of the ambient hallway lighting and a huge plant, curious. And then he saw Hyunjin reach for Minho's face and kiss him. On the lips! Felix's jaw dropped, incredulous at what he was witnessing. An inaudible gasp left his lips. His ears were buzzing with white noise as he watched this strange scene unfold: Minho placed his hands on Hyunjin's waist and kissed him back. "I'll see you later, Min." He heard Hyunjin's voice loud and clear now. "See you, love." The older replied, a smile lingering on his face.

Love? Love?!? What is going here? Behind his back? Did Minho undermine him? How? When? Why??? Oh, Yongbok, where is the unbreakable hold you claim to have on Hyunjin now? You've been had, Yongbok. You've been overconfident and now, now you are facing the results of your hubris. His mind was spinning, untethered. What the hell?

He saw Minho finally let go of Hyunjin and turn to leave as the door closed behind him, still smiling sweetly, his face soft and eyes dreamy, humming a song. He saw Felix staring at him with daggers in his eyes. His expression turned into a slightly teasing one. "Hey Lix. What are you doing here?" He asked lightheartedly. "What are YOU doing here, hyung?" He retorted, a slight annoyance creeping into his voice, causing it to sound a pitch higher. "I was with Hyunjin." Minho replied nonchalantly. "This early in the morning, hyung?" Oh, the sarcasm! So not subtle! Minho smirked. "I spent the night here." Normally, he wouldn't expose Hyunjin or himself like this but, Felix's attitude deserved a response. He watched with secret satisfaction the shock on the younger's face. "You spent the night here?" Felix echoed his words. "Mhmm." He walked past the dumbfounded young man towards the elevator, smirking wickedly. He shouldn't but he did anyway. He would have to apologize to Hyunjin for spilling the beans without consulting him first, but he is sure the raven-haired won't mind.

Hyunjin didn't care about Felix's feelings anymore. Yeah...

Of course, there was room for misinterpretation of Minho's words but, the hickeys he shamelessly displayed on his exposed neck made things a little more... specific. No, there is no room for misinterpretation. Sorry, not sorry, Yongbok! Felix ran after him. "So what? Are you two together now?" His tone was again a little sarcastic. "It seems that way, yes." Minho answered casually. Felix laughed humorlessly. This was priceless. The irony of it all. "So soon?" He asked mockingly. Minho ignored him. "He may want to have a family." He said, irritated. "I will never stand in the way of what he wants." Minho replied calmly. "Doesn't it bother you that you came second?" Felix said haughtily. "Ah, Yongbok, it is not like you to be so bitter. Does it bother you so much that, while I came second, I might be the last?" Minho's face was calm, though his words stung. Felix looked down. He felt a little ashamed of himself but he wasn't going to give up so easily, no way! "You made your decision." Minho continued, serious. "Without him. Now, you have to live with the consequences." He could be very dry but he was right. And Felix knew it. There was a price for acting rushly and it was steep.

Felix looked back at the closed apartment door. Was it worth it, going to Hyunjin now? Was there still a chance? Minho watched him, curious. "Do you still expect him to take you back?" Felix met his eyes defiantly. "Hyunjin loves me." "He-lo-ved-you." Minho emphasized each syllable. "You threw his love away." "You don't know what you're talking about!" Felix shouted losing his cool. But Minho wasn't having it. "I know enough to know that you've got a lot of nerve." He looked at the younger with a mixture of disillusionment and annoyance. "Not only were you insensitive to his heartache but, when it suited you, you had the audacity to ask, no, to demand that not only he takes you back but also accept the fact that you have a child and be a father to your child with someone else, no questions asked." Felix was about to retort his words but Minho didn't let him. "The irony is that, if you've played your cards right, Yongbok, he would've. He would've done whatever you wanted because he trully, deeply loved you a lot! But you were too arrogant and over confident. Dismissing him like he was some kind of nuisance when he tried to approach you to resolve matters between you two. I saw you one too many times getting mad at him, when all he showed towards you was love, kindness and consideration. You treated him like some bothersome fanboy." Minho's eyes were shooting fires now although he never raised his voice. "Have you ever stopped to think how much he ached? What he went through when you were already in another relationship?" "I was never in another relationship! Stop saying that!" Felix spat back angrily. "Come on Yongbok! You and I both know that you were with that girl every time you went back to Sydney! Every single time!" Minho's eyes glinted wickedly. "Hyunjin also has affairs with others!" Felix replied defensively. "You are just another one of his rebounds." Minho looked at him, completely unfazed. "What I am, is none of your business. I'm not competing with you or anyone else for his love, Yongbok. I don't need to. He loves me inspite of you. And as for his affairs, I am aware. He is not secretive about them. Unlike you." Felix still looked defiant. "So, go on. What are you waiting for? If you're so confident, go to him. Ask him again to take you back. See what happens." Minho said calmly again. "What will you do if he does?" The younger couldn't help sounding irked. "Will he?" Minho tilted his head to the side, looking at him observantly.

Will he?

Felix's confidence was slowly evaporating. Hyunjin's demeanor has changed significantly towards him since he came back from his last trip to Sydney, ever since he found out about the baby. Felix only had himself to blame, really. He handled things poorly. He should never have  left Hyunjin exposed to other people's affection, even if they were his fellow members, his long time friends, his second family. One of them - a traitor, in his mind - has stepped into Felix's path, pulling Hyunjin away from his arms. Felix should have been the only one to give Hyunjin the attention and affection he craves. He sees that now. Unfortunatelly it may be too late.

It is too late.


And there you have it. Life happens. Love is lost between what is said and what is left unsaid. What you want is not always what you get, or need for that matter. And what seems out of reach is sometimes a step away. Hyunjin was fortunate enough to be deeply loved by two men. One that did not have enough faith in them and one that never stopped believing. One made a mistake and refused to admit it. The other persisted, despite his shortcomings and flaws. Hyunjin loved them both. He was simply wise enough to choose the one who opened up to him unconditionally.

Sadly, Yongbok never got over Jinnie.


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