"Here." I offered my handkerchief to Alessa. Paalis na din kami maya maya papunta sa shooting venue. Dumaan lamang ako sa cr mag-isa dahil may inaasikaso pa si Shane at naabutan ko si Alessa na umiiyak.
"Thank you. I'm really pathetic." Inabot nya ang panyo at pinunasahan ang kanyang luha.
"Well not that pathetic. I know it's hard for you to do that." I wash my hands and she is still wiping her face.
"Kahit anong gawin ko ayaw nila sa akin and I thought about what you said. I can't keep acting like that but it's still hard for me." Wala ba syang nagiging kaibigan mabait naman sya. I don't want to be with her longer because I already cut her off. No matter what happen to her, it shouldn't be any of my business.
"I'm leaving." She smile and thank me ibabalik nya pa sana ang panyo ngunit iniwan ko na ito sa kanya.
Days passed and I still haven't heard anything from Shawn but flowers are still being delivered in my unit.
Radon and I are still exchanging message but I'm keeping it minimal. I don't know what might happen to him kapag nalaman ni Shawn na lagi kaming nagkikita. I decided to strengthen whatever happening between us kapag naayos ko na ang issue ko kay Shawn. It's Saturday and I am staring at nothingness.
My phone is ringing so I took it.
'Radon calling..' I sigh. Hindi ko na alam ang idadahilan ko sa kanya. He's asking me when he could visit my photoshoot or when we can go out again but I don't know how to answer him. I took a deep breath and answer the call.
"Hello, Chantal. Good morning." He has a very energetic voice.
"Good morning Radon."
"Can we go out today?"I really don't know how to answer him. I don't even know if I'm doing things right.
" I don't really know. I'm kinda busy. " I lied through my nose.
" Chantal. "He called me in a sad voice.
" Are you avoiding me? Did I do something wrong or did I offend you in any way? " Now his voice is really sad.
" No, Radon. I am not mad of you. It's just that I'm really busy lately. "Liar, I'm really a liar.
" Really! I thought you got mad because I almost kiss you before. If you are not comfortable with physical touches then I won't do any of it. I want to do this properly. I really like you so much and I want to work this out. " I feel bad. I've been ignoring this awesome man just because of some crazy lunatic guy. This is just wrong.
" I am really not mad. I allowed your advances and I know you won't do anything I do not like. I'm just busy lately but you know what you can watch my photoshoot next week." I am so weak at this. Dapat ay hinintay ko munang maayos ang kung anuman sa amin ni Shawn but here I am.
" Thank youu. I'll see you soon. I know you are tired so rest well Chantal. "We bid each other goodbye and I just stared at nothingness again. Bahala na nga.
Kinabukasan ay pumunta ako sa isang cafe upang kausapin si Secretary Jones. Siya ang namamahala ng iniwang assets ng adoptive mother ko. She's been sending me an email and I don't know what to reply so she's just flew here.
"Good morning Ms. Madrigal." She sternly said. She's in the mid 40's and she has a very strict aura.
"Good morning Mrs. Jones." I took a seat. She's looking at me attentively. In Chantal's memory, sya ang right hand ng adoptive mother nya at sa kanya ako iniwan nito bago sya mamatay. Chantal left America after the death of her adoptive mother and let Mrs. Jones do things she's supposed to do.
"I'll go straight to the point. Please go back to America and manage all the assets you inherited from your mother. 4 years is enough for all your unnecessary rendezvous." She is really blunt.
"I'm not ready for that." But maybe going back is not that bad. I can escape Shawn and start a life without him.
"You are more than ready for this. You are an excellent student and even graduated as dean lister at a prestigious university." Chantal took up business management because that's what her adoptive mother like. She hates it, so when she had the chance she left that place.
" I just renewed my contract and I am still in the middle of something."She sips her coffee and put her eyeglasses away.
" You can just pay for the damages. You have plenty of money for that. Look, You have a big share in that company and everyone is dying to buy that piece of share so you handle it. I want to retire and just travel around." I don't know what to say. What Chantal had is not a small matter it's quite big and she really need a right person for this.
" Think about it. I just want to say this to you but no matter what you said you are Amanda's daughter. I'm training my daughter to be your future secretary but you need to start managing all of these." I ate the chocolate cake in front of me. Normally I wouldn't do it but I can't help it. We talk for a few more minutes before we bid good byes.
Chantal backstory is somewhat sad. I had all of her memories and in her memory she doesn't know she was adopted until she was 18. Her mother was very strict with her and sometimes she hurts her physically. Bata pa lamang sya ay nakalakihan nya na ang pagiging controlling ng ina nya. She couldn't have a friend easily because her mother is always picky with everything. She made her study piano, ballet and archery all at the same time. Minsan nagkakaroon ng episode ang ina nya kung saan ay nagiging hysterical ito at nanakit. However she never hurt her face. She's always obsessed with her face. She was traumatised at a very young age.
She didn't experience love. All she knew is her life isn't decided by hers. Her clothing style, her hobbies, her future, everything. Everything was decided by her mother. She's like a puppet. She wonder why her mother looks at her like she adore her but the other minute she'll look at her like she was just a stranger. Minsan ay nagtataka sya kung bakit ganoon umakto ang kanyang ina at kung bakit di nya nakikita ang ama nya.
Then on her 18th birthday she found it all out. She is not her real daughter. She is the replacement for her dead daughter. She heard her mother talking with her ex husband about how crazy everything is. She confronts her mother but she wouldn't tell her anything, she just shut her down. She tried and tried but no one would tell her any details. She beg and cried so much that her adoptive mother told her that her real parents died when she's only 3 years old. She adopted her and made it look like she died too so no one will ever question about her identity as her new daughter. That time namatayan ng anak ang umampon sa kanya dahil nalunod ito, hindi nito kinaya ang sakit at naghiwalay sila ng kanyang asawa. She was at the hospital because she almost took her life when she saw the 3 yrs old Chantal crying with few wounds and her parents are on the brink of death. She's grieving and when she saw that the child shares many similarities with her dead daughters she claims her.
Chantal was crying the whole time. She wants to know what her real name is. Where are her parents so she can visit her grave but her adoptive mother use her desperate plea to manipulate her. She told her that if she do this and that then she might tell her. She's so desperate that's why she can't escape from her adoptive mother grasp.
Amanda Madrigal, her adoptive mother was cruel at the very end. She took all the information with her into the grave. At the very end, she made Chantal suffer. She made Chantal loath her to death. That is why the first thing Chantal did when she died is to leave that place because she hate it to the core. She hate how she live as a substitute daughter for a mentally unstable mother. She hate the life she had in America and how powerless she is at that time. She hate the life and the name that isn't even hers. In the end she couldn't abandon her name because it's the only identity she ever know. It's both her consolation and curse.
