A Shattered Dream

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Dekha hai zindagi ko kuch itne qareeb se,

Chehre tamaam lagne Lage hai ajeeb se.

-Sahir Ludhianvi


-Manasvi-

When I reached the place where I told Aryan to wait, I was at first taken aback to not find him there.

My heart was already racing, but I tried to control my nervousness, fear and excitement.

"Maybe, he went to the parking lot to get his car so we could drive to the library." I thought to myself.
I started walking towards the parking lot looking for him and his car. Mercedes Maybach exelero. I liked the sound of it for some reason. And I won't lie, I even liked the money spent on it.

But to my bad luck, i couldn't find him there.
So, i thought to myself that maybe, he's at the gate, waiting for me to come.

"Oh I hope that he hasn't been waiting for me for too long."

With the hope of finding him at the gate, I ran.

All my theatre friends and co-actors were at the entrance, eating, gossiping, waiting to leave.

But I still couldn't find him.

I saw Aditi at the gate and went on to ask her whether she knew where Aryan was, since she was working with us, for the same play, closely.

"Hey, Aditi.. do you have any idea where Aryan is?" I asked her hurriedly.

"Aryan-yan?" She questioned suspiciously.

"Oh sorry aryan sir, i meant." I immediately corrected myself."

She smirked, and informed me that she didn't know anything about it.

The next thing I had on my mind was to call him. I didn't know whether it was the right thing to do or not. But there was no other option left, if I had to go on the library 'date'  with him. I dialed, more hesitantly than ever. 4 rings, a girl spoke from the opposite side. 

"Yes?" she asked.

"Hello, this is Manasvi from the theatre group." 

"Yeah, the name suggests, go ahead, why did you call. Any work?" she spoke, in an annoyed tone.

"Actually," I didn't know how to respond.

"Go ahead. There's a ton of work for me to do. Will you speak, woman."

"Basically,"

"Sir's busy, so am I. Don't have time for your 'actually and basically'. Cut off." she said, in an more annoyed tone than it was earlier.

"Na jaane kahan kahan se call karte hai. I don't understand why sir provides these desperate newcomers with his phone number." saying this, she hung up.

"I don't know from where such people come. I don't understand why sir provides these desperate newcomers with his phone number." saying this, she hung up.

Aryan cancelled the library outing? Yes, he did. He did it, without even informing me about that. How could he even do that? If he didn't want to go with me, then he should've said that on my face itself. 

This thing about guys, providing girls with false hopes. Why? What fun do they find in hurting us? Could have told me in the face, I would have taken aback but at least it wouldn't have hurt me this bad. 

Oh god. How could I go so wrong in recognising truly how a person is? Why did I even think that he would come with me? This is all so bad.

All this time, it was just in my head.

Yes, that was the day, I had decided to never talk with him ever, apart from work. I had decided to never accept his lift to drop me to the station. I had decided to not respond to any of his chances to speak to me after the rehearsal. But did he really try? Did he really make up the chances to speak to me? Did he really want to speak to me? Was it just in my head. And nothing else.

Sixteen year old Manasvi, couldn't understand the thin line between friendship and affection.
After all these years, when I think about it, I find myself betraying my emotions during those days, and even betraying the friendship which Aryan had projected.

But how long could I even continue with it. The volcano of teenage frustration was certainly about to erupt. It was just a matter of when. And in front of whom.






Hello readers.
It's been a long long time since I updated the story. But since I mentioned that I am going to complete the story so here's the beginning of the second half of my writing.

Please do read the two 'author's note' published before starting over with this chapter.

Stay tuned for the coming chapters.

Love love.






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