Edward

Family Support

My awakening the following morning was a rude one. A giggling three year old girl was on her knees, on my back, bouncing up and down. I immediately heard Tabby's voice.

"Hannah! Get off of him!"

"Uncle Eddie needs to get up."

"Yes, honey, he does. How is he supposed to get up if you're bouncing on his back?" She stopped.

"Would it be better if I sit still?"

My back was sore, and it was all I could do not to laugh. What an absurd way for a day to start.

"Hannah, my young friend, you are holding me down. Why don't you go help your grandma?"

"Okay!" She stood up on my back, jumped off, and raced out of the room.

"Sorry about that, Ed. She ran in here before we could stop her."

"It's fine. She's a spirited kid."

I walked into the kitchen to find mom, Amanda, and Tabby sitting at the table. Tabby was holding Samuel. Elise was frying eggs, while Reuben was grating a potato into a pan for hash browns. The three little girls were a whirling dervish of noise in the backyard. Bret was standing just outside the door watching them. Josh walked up beside me.

"Those twins of yours must be a handful."

"They can be. They need room to run. How are you feeling?"

"Hanging in."

"Cravings?"

"Every twinge of craving brings my dad to mind. I see him in that hospital bed. I will never be able to have another drink without that image. I may never have another thought about drinking without that image."

The doorbell rang. Josh answered it. Pastor Mark and Laura walked in. He had a big package of pork sausage patties, which he handed to Reuben.

Mark said, "Samantha, there's a short, blonde tornado spinning in your backyard."

"She's Reuben and Tabby's kid, but she reminds me so much of Amanda at that age." At that point, Hannah fell down. She got up, and staggered into the house.

Josh asked, "You okay there, cupcake?"

"Yes, uncle Josh. It's fun being dizzy."

Mark asked, "Josh, when you called me last night, you said Jeff left a suicide note. Do you have it by chance?"

Bret answered, "It's in my truck. If you'll watch the girls, I'll go get it." He grabbed my arm and nodded toward the door as he walked by. I followed him out the front door.

"I taught your sister how to drive in this truck." He opened the door, and grabbed the planner.

"I know she drives that old station wagon. I can't picture Amanda behind the wheel of this rig."

"She passed her driving test in it."

Mark was waiting in the living room.

Bret asked, "Ed, will you excuse us?"

I walked into the kitchen. Amanda was brushing grass out of one of the twins' hair.

The hospital called at ten o'clock. We had scheduled the call for a status report.

"He's still with us. His pulse is up to forty-two, and steady. Brain activity is erratic, but it's there. The dialysis has been disconnected. Time will tell on liver and kidney function."

Reuben remembered the leather duffle bag. He grabbed it from under the end table at the far-end of the couch.

"Amanda, Bret and I found this leather bag in the closet, in your room at your dad's."

"That was the bag I used when we traveled."

He pulled out the black plastic trash bag. He dropped the leather bag, and pulled open the trash bag.

"Your old, four-post bed is still in your room. It's still made. This was sitting right in the middle of it."

Reuben pulled the plastic down, revealing an orangey-red furred teddy bear, about eighteen inches high. It was faded, and looked well used.

"Mr. Puffy!" Amanda reached out and took the bear from Reuben. She hugged it close.

Samantha sat down. She looked like the wind had been knocked out of her.

Josh asked, "Samantha, are you okay?"

"Yes, Josh. Have any of you ever had a long-buried memory suddenly jump out at you?"

Pastor Mark said, "I have. Those tend to have special meaning. Would you like to share yours?"

"Amanda, you were probably too young to remember when your dad gave you Mr. Puffy."

"I don't remember. Dad gave him to me?"

"You were about Hannah's age. You had started having nightmares. You'd wake up screaming, and your dad would race down the hall to make sure you were all right. After the fourth night in a row, he brought Mr. Puffy home to you. He told you that Mr. Puffy would protect you when your dad wasn't in your room with you. He told you when you felt scared, to hug Mr. Puffy extra tight. Every night after that, when your dad and I went to bed, we'd peek into your room. We'd see you cuddling Mr. Puffy. That was true right up through your last night in that house."