I Think You're My Best Friend | Patrick Stump

♫♪♫ Chapter Eleven ♫♪♫

"Did you get a chance to hear the song yet?"

Patrick's message appears on my screen as soon as Luke steps outside my apartment door to leave for work. I won't see him again until next weekend.

I told Luke that I wasn't going to move with him to Des Moines. He was upset at first, really upset, but then he told me he understood it was best because my friends are here as well as my job. He decided that he'd come stay with me in my apartment on weekends. While I miss him during the week, mostly because I'm not used to being alone, I do enjoy having my own space and cherish the time we have together on the weekends. He does want me to move there eventually, to which I told him I would in the future as long as things stay this well between us. I don't know if it was a lie or not.

I make my way to the couch and sit down, and Mac jumps up on my lap. I give him a few scratches behind the ear as I type out a message to send to Patrick.

"Hi, Pattycakes. Had a super busy weekend yet again so I haven't gotten a chance to listen. I'm going to check it out right now. Will message you back in a few minutes with my thoughts. I know it'll be amazing."

I click on Patrick's Twitter account, and I feel my heart skip a beat when I see his last tweet.

"Oh, my god..." I whisper and feel tears begin to form in my eyes as I look over the tweet again and again, unable to believe what I'm reading.

"My new single 'Until Next Time, Beautiful' is out now. Hope you all enjoy."

Those are the exact words he said to me that morning in Chicago before I left. Maybe it's just a coincidence. Surely it's just a coincidence.

I decide to message him again before clicking on the link, and hope that I'm not about to make a fool out of myself for jumping to conclusions.

"Patrick...you didn't. If this is about us, I'm going to cry. I'm already crying."

I go back to the tweet, then take a few deep breaths before clicking on the link. The YouTube app opens on my phone, and the video starts playing.

Patrick's sitting in front of a black backdrop, holding his Ovation MT37-5. God, he looks perfect. I hear a man laugh in the background, and Patrick chuckles, "Are we rolling or what?" He asks as he positions himself, shaking his head. 

The camera cuts to a closer shot of Patrick, and he begins to play chords that I can only describe as peaceful and beautiful.

"Four a.m. conversations, raw and real, unveiling truths that hearts conceal. Your touch, a memory I'll keep, as I sail these waves in dreams so deep. For now we bid adieu, to Montrose Beach, where dreams once knew. Until next time, my dear Haley. In your absence, I'll find solace daily. Until next time, beautiful..."

I'm sobbing loudly before the chorus even starts. Thank goodness I didn't listen to this when Luke was here.

Yeah, the song is definitely about me...unless he met up with another girl named Haley on Montrose Beach at four in the morning within the last few months.

Right when I thought that maybe Patrick and I were just better off as friends, he writes a song about me. Right when I consider repairing things with Luke, he pours his heart and soul into a melody about our conversation that night in Chicago. Right when I get over the idea that I didn't love him like that, he makes me think I do once again.

Okay, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions again. Maybe this is just a song about our platonic friendship. No, platonic friends don't kiss. I mean, they can, I suppose? That didn't feel like two platonic friends kissing, though. It was intimate. Or since I was a fucking dumbass that just stood there with my arms at my sides, maybe it didn't seem intimate to him. Ugh. Patrick, what the fuck?