What if
all the things we've worked so hard for means nothing in the end?.
How sad to think that we won't ever be able to return to some of the places we once loved so much— homes, people, hearts. But The love and hate we give will always find their way back to us,
As we are nothing but a galaxy of connection, stumbling upon
What We Once Gave Out.
Author's pov.....
She stand infront of the mirror only wearing underwear looking at the scars she got from that night . She touched The bald spot on her head where they had to shave to operate on her skull, down to the stitched wound on her thigh where he stab her, to that ugly scar over her eye that the doctor told her would fade with time .
She sobbed as she looked at herself "how could anyone love me with these ugly scars? I don't even love myself anymore". she cried harder looking at her appearance.
" I don't know - how long I can pretend to be okay anymore, I'm not okay". she cried sliding down on the bathroom floor.
she pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged herself while crying. After a few minutes of staying in that position she got up walking over to her clothes searching her pockets . "Gotcha". she whispered sitting back down on the floor feeling the cold from the tiles.
She strike the lighter looking at the flame, she let out a laugh ," pathetic" she sighed flexing her knee bringing the flame down under her thigh. She whimpered then relax feeling the burn numb the pain in her chest She stayed that way feeling the lighter getting hot, few minutes later she passed out on the bathroom floor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~Shanta's pov
It was the ringing from my phone that woke me. I lift my head from the cold bathroom tile before grabbing my phone looking at the caller ID. I smile seeing who it was.
"Hello". his deep voice rang through the phone.
"H-hi". I curse myself for stuttering.
"Hey, did I wake you" he asked.
"No, not really".
" mmh. my driver is dropping Hanna off so you two can catch up , I tried to called you earlier to asked if it was okay with you first but you didn't answer my calls". He finished.
" I'm sorry my phone was on silent".
" mmh, its okay I have to go now, make sure to eat something, I'll stop and get something for dinner for us later, so text me to let me know what you feel for, and remember to apply the ointment on your wounds. I have to go now bye" he said then ended the called before I could answer.
Author's POV~~~~~~~~~~~~A hour or so later Shanta answered the door for Hanna who pulled her in a bone crushing hug, she even started to cry before glimpsing behind her with a gasp.
"I knew that Jeon was rich but I didn't know he was this rich" hanna said to her cousin still gawking over Jeon's house. " you should see his car collection and the infinity pool on the rooftop" Shanta said and that got Hanna more excited.
" well don't just stand there come on and show me every inch of this house" Hanna said pulling Shanta from here to there awing over the expensive Decor, details and designs of everything..
" imagine if you marry Jeon, all of this will be all yours, you'd be rich " Hanna said looking at Shanta with a smile. "Hanna I'm not poor", Shanta replied so done with her cousin.
" ahh you know what I mean" Hanna rolled her eyes. "do you know how lucky you are to be living at thee Jeon park's house?. You're the first in history, I've heard that a woman have never seen the inside of his house and I can see why, and you're just here living with him" Hanna gasped touching a gold ornament that rest above the fire place.
" way to not sound badmind Hanna, and he's my boyfriend why wouldn't I come here? We live together for Christ sake. Eat the same food, drink the same water , sleep in the same bed" Shanta was cut off by another gasp from Hanna.
" you guys sleep together I-in the same bed?" She yelled running over to her cousin pulling her to the couch sitting her down.
"spill, how was it ? Have you two, you know" Hanna wiggled her brows. " have we what?" Shanta said looking at her cousin with a straight face , " have you fuck" she said excitingly causing Shanta to hiss her teeth.
" this girl. No we having" Shanta said hitting Hanna on her arm who pout rubbing the area where she was hit just now.
"he's been very distant ever since I got back from the hospital, even though I don't remember how we were before I lost my memory but I'm sure we weren't this far apart".
"Pff you'd be surprised how far apart you two were" Hanna whispered to herself.
"Eeh ? What was that ?".
"Oh nothing, I said nothing".
"Mmh okay, anyways. He said he wants my memory to come back first before doing anything", Shanta spoke with sigh.
" he won't even give me something as simple as a kiss on the lips, I can feel him holding himself back. I understand he wants to wait, I do but what if I never get my memories back ? What will happen then ?".
~~~~~~~~~~Shanta's pov.
Yesterday Jeon came home from work acting weirder than usual, he kept looking at me like he was debating with himself. Everytime I ask what it was he played dumb saying it was nothing, I let it go choosing to believe his words, trusting that if it was something important he would let me know.
~~~~~~~
I silently ate my food he brought home today while he do the same. My mind sometimes wonder thinking about how we were before losing my memory, I hope we were happy. I smile looking at him , he's kind of handsome I guess, um who am I kidding? This man could be one of the Greek gods,
"um have your dad called you today?", he asked snapping me out of my thoughts, I cleared my throat before answering. " you know him , he said he's coming to visit soon. I told him that he don't have to because I'm doing fine".
"Mmh" Jeon replied with a hummed. It's been almost 2 month since I woke up from my coma and my dad and brothers still worry. I guess I understand why though, something traumatic happened to me and I came to a realization that it not only affected me but the people around me as well, but I'm fine now , really I'm okay.
"Have you been treating your wounds?", he asked and I nod my head. "Good , I'll take a look at them soon", he said looking at me, "okay" I whispered looking down playing with my food. " what's wrong" he asking placing his chopsticks on his plate, I'm still figuring out how to use those.
" it's nothing", I said and he didn't looked convince.
"I won't push you to talk, but when things get hard and it feels to much for you to handle, promise me that you'll come to me , that you'll let me shoulder some of your burdens", he said and I didn't know I was crying until he came to my side wiping the tears away from my cheeks.
" okay" I said and he kissed my forehead before clearing the table. That night I slept comfortably wrapped in his arms not feeling afraid of the man that hurt me.
✿ 𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 ✿
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