fresh cuts

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TW! Sh, blood, sharp objects

(Johnnies pov)

I was so sick of some of my fans. I'm not a creep. I can't look myself in the face without feeling disgust. Am I really that bad of a person?

I walk towards the bathroom as I take out a blade. I close the door and lock it. To many thoughts in my head. Should I really do this...I've been clean for a long time. I know I'll regret this...but I want it...I want to feel it again...

I start with one cut. I get lost in my thoughts as my vision goes black. My eyes open as I realize I have multiple deep cuts. Fuck, I messed up.

My whole body shakes as I start to cry. Why. Why would I do this?

I call Jake, even though he's on stream right now. I need him. Why would I do this...

My thoughts continue to rush through my mind. I pick up my phone and call him. I wait for him to pick up as I continue to cry.

(Jakes pov)

I was just about to say something as I get a call from Johnnie. Weird? I answer it. "Hey I'm on stream, what's u-" I get cut off by hearing him crying. My face goes blank.

"Johnnie are you okay?...answer me please!" I say worriedly as I continue to hear him crying. "Jake-...please come in the house...i-im sorry..." I hear he's voice cry. "Okay, okay, I'm coming, please calm down!" I say as I quickly rush out my car into the house.

I hear his crying from the bathroom. I quickly run over there and open the door to see Johnnie on the floor with blood dripping down his arms on the floor into a small puddle. My face goes pale.

"Oh...my...god- Johnnie!" I say nervously as I quickly sit him up and start to clean his cuts. I grab bandages and wrap them around his wrists.

I realize I'm crying as I continue to do this. "Why Johnnie?" I say quietly as I clean up blood. "I'm sorry..." His voice cry's quietly. I lift him up and bring him to my room. I lay him down on the bed with me. I wrap my arms around him as he cuddles up quickly with me. He's still crying...

I rub his back and try to calm him down. "It's okay...just breath...I got you Johnnie..." I say softly in his ear as I rock him back and forth. He breathing starts to slow down. I look down and see his eyes closed as he stays close to me. "Just like that, breathe...it'll be fine, I promise..." I say softly as Johnnie calls down more.

"I'm sorry Jake..." Johnnies voice almost whispers. "There's nothing to be sorry about...just calm down, okay?" I say softly reassuring him. I pull Johnnie onto my lap gently as I let his head rest against me. "Just listen to my heart beat...try not to focus on anything else...it'll be okay..." I speak softly as I start to hear Johnnie soft snores.

He fell asleep in my arms. I don't give a shit about that stream right now, as long as Johnnies okay then I'm okay.

I keep my arms wrapped around Johnnie softly, but tightly. I close my eyes too as I listen to his breathing slowing. I find myself calm again as I start to drift off too. I hope he's okay...

Short but whatever. But seriously, some of u fans actually r so rude to him it's crazy. Saying he's a creep, when he's literally the sweetest fucking person ever. Idk why u guys treat him like this. He's done nothing wrong.

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