(You can tell what'll happen in this chapter already, can't you?)
I slipped my clothes off and fell asleep on the old, ripped couch. But was awoken at night by a voice.
"What are you doing in my mansion." The voice said. My eyes shot open and I jumped up, jumping on top of the Zaddy in self defense. We fell over onto the ground, me somehow ending up under him.
"OOOHHHHH~~~" I moaned as loud as possible to make it even more awkward, despite it already being awkward cuz I'm completely naked. I looked over to the couch and realized I was on my period and the couch was covered in stains.
He frowned at me in disgust and got up, as another guy came in the room.
The first guy who woke me up had slicked to the side black hair, yellow eyes, slit pupils, very very pale skin, a fully black and red suit, and horns, the same color as his skin, both horns slicked back and tipped with red. He was tall and slim, about 6'7 I'd say
The second guy looked the same, just 7'0, so, taller. And he wasn't as hot. And he wasn't as pale, and his eyes were period blood red. He smirked when he saw me, then came over and picked me off the ground like a princess.
"Whas goin on here?" He said in his gravely, deeper than the pits of hell voice. What a zaddy.
"I don't know, but this creature broke into our mansion in the morning, fell asleep, and got period blood all over our couch!" The hotter vampire said. He had a British accent, and sounded somewhat fussy. Like a mix of Stolas from Helluva Boss and Aziraphale from Good Omens. He sounded like a cute little British guy, but looked like a demon. Or maybe a...
"V-V-V-V-V-V-V-VAMPIRESSSSSSSSS!!!" I screeched, peeing myself on the spot. Muscle vampire looked at me after I peed all over him and the floor, and just got down on all fours and licked it up. He even went to the couch and licked up the period blood.
"That's disgusting! Don't do such foul things!" The British vampire said. But I thought it was hawt, uwu~
"Don't worry baby girl, you can live with master right here."
"Uh, no she cannot?"
"Yes, shawty, she can."
"Uhm, no?"
"Yes."
"No?"
"Yes baba boi, now sit like a good boy as she introduces herself."
"Ew..." The British Vampire made a face, but did sit down on the couch NOT covered in dried period stains and saliva. Me and Master sat in the period blood-saliva couch.
"I-I-I-I'M Y-Y-Y-Y-Y/N!!" I scream sang, before standing up on the couch and singing. What was I singing? Oh you guessed it.
You know what I sang
It was WAP, what were YOU thinking?!
"NOW FROM THE TOP, MAKE IT DROP, THAT'S SOME WET ASS PUSSY
NOW GET A BUCKET AND A MOP, THAT'S SOME WET ASS PUSSY
I'M TALKING WAP, WAP, WAP, THAT'S SOME WET ASS PUSSY
MACARONI IN A POT, THAT'S SOME WET ASS PUSSY, HUH!!"
The British Vampire frowned and looked at Master, waving his hand at me and mouthing 'eeeeexactly' But I ignored him as Master grinned at him and applauded my performance.
"That was lovely, kitten."
"T-t-t-thank you, u-u-u-uwu~"
"Okay, that is ENOUGH. GET OUT!" The British Vampire kinda whined and pointed at the door.
"Stop Shouting, Baby Boiii."
"I'M NOT SHOUTING!!" He paused, frowning. "OKAY MAYBE I AM SHOUTING. GET OUT!"
I started crying like a baby scream-cry-whisper-singing Fight Song by Rachel Platten.
"Don't be jealous, Baby Boiii, you can sit on my lap too."
"NO?! NO THANK YOU?!" He yelled. He then just ran up to his room. The moment he left me and Master banged on the couch.
After banging the 1292691519161916188369162926297291729379363844748363862835496291619730291019027382618379350505967366496868472582649161947406057371518749506863861518253975029172840505938271518348626563872528371910103764519273847368473682729362819161619279363726186291817253864946595969371616186347464646473724243840261853614263624204l5275392527531637453525450352946262472525026254210126304263046352735274956173615283261524959288385528252836172584759361625957th time, I ran up to the British Vampire's Room, who I found out from Master that his name was Levain, but Master always called him baby boy, or something else like that. Sweet Cheeks, Sugar, shit like that. So (cringe) HAWTTT!!!
"Levain?" I called out, opening the door to him not being there. I turned the lights off and sat on his bed in the dark, waiting for him to get back. I made sure to piss and shit on the bed as hard as I can all the time as hard as I could. After all, Master thought it hawt, so Levain must too, right?
A bat flew in through the window, blood dripping out of it's mouth, and it transformed into Levain. He looked at me, looked at his bed, and grew bat wings. He stayed human, just got wings. He grabbed me by my hair, flew to the Appalachian Mountains (very far away, as this whole story takes place in Iowa), and dropped me in. He then flew home and threw Master into the sunlight, he died immediately and Levain lived happily and cleanly until I bothered him again. I turned back into a fox and ran back to Iowa, ready to find my new home.
