All The Lovely Little Vampires

All The Lovely Little Vampires chapter 16

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

So here youll be getting more of a point of view of what Lia is really feeling about everything. Ive devoted this chapter to her thoughts and actions shes taking ovet this. It’s a preeeety intense chapter, and sad, and a little insane, but it had to be done in order to really get the picture of what shes feeling, all the emotions churning inside of her lately. Zi hope its not too bad! Hope you enjoy it, cause its gonna be a preety intense newt few chapters! We are now close to the middle of the book! Yaaay! The last part of the book takes up a lot of time and space, but it’s the BEST part!!! Thanks, enjoy and leave comments! I adore feedback, so please fan and leave commebts and vote!!! And I appologize for all gramar mistakes in advance! Enjoy!

          Im so glad that my room is connected to a bathroom with a shower in it. I spend most of my time taking warm bubble baths or just soaking in the large clawfoot  tub with built in jets that I could control to my will. It was actually a lot more Like a jacuzy that looked like a tub, if you ask me. With the jets on, I relaxed my entire body in the hot water, the jets of water drumming soothingly against my feet and sides. I let my head sink under that water, just enough to keep my nose above so I can breath. I wonder what it would be like to drown? Would it be a peaceful way to go? The thought of  feeling like this when I die comforted me a bit, relaxed in water. Then I realized the worse part of it. I always see people thrashing around and spazing out when they drown, in utter terror and fear consuming them. Suffocating has always scared me pale, yet I lable drowning as a good way to go when it’s the same thing as suffocating? Lack of oxygen to the brain.

          I had always wondered about how I would die. Would it be a good way, or would I suffer? Will I die young, or an old woman? Such horrible thoughts consumed me latly, ones I know I should not be thinking. I never want to be an old woman. I know most people would love nothing more than to grow old with someone they love, but I would much rather prefer to stay young forever with the one I love. Pain shocked me again like a cold knife hitting a soft spot in my chest. I was semi used to the feeling, but that dosnt mean it has no less of an affect on me than the first time I felt it. The thwart seemed to reach right under my skin, right where I couldn’t reach it. I itched at my skin again, wincing as I accidentally opened up healing scars on my chest from the last time I did it.

          The wounds leaked a few drops of my blood into the water, turning it a faint transparent red until it slowly mixed in with the rest of the water. The very thought of me soaking in my own blood made me sick, yet I got a small thrill from it. It made me feel more like the vampires I call family. The music from my radio played softly the tune of a song I deeply loved and could compare my life to in the past week or two (Ive mostly lost count), If I Die Young by The Band Perry.

          Ive never known the loving of a man, but it sure felt nice when he was holding my hand…

          The words flowed on, naming out sequances I could relate to. I only wish I could say that I did feel the love of a man. All the pain lately made me feel so empty and grogy, so incomplete. I felt like a piece of me was missing, a part of my soul was off somewhere else, left behind and cold and alone in the dark, waiting to be rescued. Yet, I always thought I felt that way- empty and distraught, like a piece of me was missing, a piece Edward held for me and would one day give back to me with his love. But I now knew that day would never arrive, and Ill have to live out the rest of my days alone and in search of something Ill never be able to have for my own. Rejected in the worst way possible.

          Unless I became a vampire.

          Aros call the other day had me counting every minute of my time, hoping today wasn’t his chosen day to get his goons to abduct me. However, I spent my time cooped up in my room, knowing the days are extreamly limited for me. I was too stubborn for my own good, you see. It created a big issue. My personalities clash with each other- my want to always get my way, yet my terrible luck. My large swell of pride and stubbornness, and my urge to make every second count and get over things. To live every second like it was my last, and frankly, it could be.