Introverts

Complications That Are Connor Franta

(PLEASE READ AUTHORS NOTE AT THE END OF THIS CHAPTER!! VV IMPORTANT!!)

T R O Y E
I've never seen anything as beautiful as Connor while he's sleeping. It's currently 6 am and I'm laying on my side starring at the fragile boy as he dreams. I normally don't get up this early, especially since we stayed up till almost 1 last night talking about school and life in general.

It turns out that Connor is not only a cat lover but has a serious coffee addiction. Along with Modern Family, pressed juice, and scented candles. He's definitely bathing in the joys of being openly gay, because he constantly talked about Adam Levine and Joey Graceffa, one of the popular gay boys at our school. The only thing weirder then calling La Crescent High 'our school' is that I was right about it.

Connor had told me stories upon stories about the group of boys who seemed to run the place. Supposedly, Dan and Phil used to be best friends back in middle school before Dan came out and decided Tyler was a better companion. Which I don't agree with by any means, Phil is one of the sweetest people I've ever met. Tyler and Connor used to be really close too, before Tyler threatened to out him if he didn't back off of Joe. Although Connor claims that he never liked Joe and Tyler's just really paranoid.

The thought of Connor telling Tyler he was gay before telling me makes me almost as mad as Tyler threatening to out him. I guess I shouldn't be angry that Tyler was told first considering it happened in Freshman year and I didn't even know they existed, but the thought of Tyler hurting Connor still irks me. Connor seemed so distraught about losing Tyler and the friendship they had even after all of my cuddling he was still noticeably duller then before bringing up the topic. He trusted Tyler with the biggest secret he's ever kept and Tyler took advantage of that. No wonder Connor hasn't told another soul about it until me.

"Troye?" A hoarse voice sounds against the walls and my eyes focus back on the boy next to me. I place a hand on his neck to let him know I'm here, his eyes still closed. He smiles. "What time is it?" I look over his shoulder and the clock. 6:20 am. I look back at him and he opens his eyes.

"6:20." I say. He groans and scoots closer to me.

"Wake me up at seven." He mumbles into my neck and I giggle as I run circles on his back.

This feels nice. He's much warmer than these stupid blankets.

I blush and hold him tighter. I feel a bit dirtier than usual for reading the thoughts I did yesterday. I couldn't read anything at the dinner table, which I'm thankful for, but then outside of his house when he grabbed me I was bombarded with feelings. Which is odd because I usually just get thoughts but his were so incoherent that all I felt was the confusion and the pain. It hurt me.

He deserves more happiness in his life. I can't imagine having something I'm so dependent on being ripped away from me so unexpectedly. He's handled it better than I would have been able to. When the clock hits seven I lean back a bit and smile at his content expression. What a shame, that I have to ruin it.

"Connah." I whisper shaking his shoulder, although I know he can't hear me. When he doesn't respond I shake him harder.

"What?" He snaps, slapping my hand away. I stare at him for a moment, shock rendering me useless. When I come back to my senses I glare at him.

"No you didn't." I shove him roughly and his eyes shoot open, fear and nausea filling them. I instantly feel bad, reaching out and grabbing him before he can fall off the bed.

"What the fuck!" He yells, grabbing the collar of my shirt and pressing against me. "Troye?" He says breathing heavily. I give him an apologetic smile.