Fazed

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T R O Y E
I walk up to the peach colored house, my hands shaking and my eyes wide. I don't try to cover up my obvious nerves, only Connors outside with me.

"Shall we?" I squeeze his hand. He turns to me and places his hands on my shoulders.

"Tro calm down. You look like your about to puke." He chuckles at me.

"Read my mind." I joke, and he gives me an unimpressed look as he rolls his eyes.

"If you're okay enough to make terrible puns then you can last one hour inside. Come on." He grabs my wrist before opening the door. The party's just how I imagined it. People everywhere, the stench of alcohol and BO strong. Connor pulls me into his side as we make our way threw the crowd. Having Connor know about my mind reading has helped me out significantly and I thank god everyday that he didn't freak out and leave me like Gavin did.

"CONNOR!" Someone screams and suddenly I'm being pulled to the left towards a couple huddled in the corner. I soon recognize them as Zoe and Alfie. Zoe smiles up at us goofily from her position pressed against her lovers side.

"Hey Zo." I faintly hear Connor yell over the music.

"So glad you guys could make it!" She screams, her voice scratchy and raw.

"Wasted?" Connor asks Alfie.

"Yeah." He laughs and I smile before looking around nervously.

"You okay?" Connor asks, squeezing my hand gently. I nod.

"I just need a drink." My throat is dry and all this body heat is getting to me.

"I'll go get us something." I turn to him quickly.

"No! No it's okay." I yell and he looks at me skeptically. "I don't need a babysitter I swear." I say and he laughs. I don't want Connor to miss out on the party he's obviously enjoying because I'm a freak. I won't let me being anti social ruin his night, he's already helped enough.

"Okay. Meet me back here?" I nod again before turning and trying to navigate my way through the mess of limbs in front of me. Once I find my way to the kitchen I shut the door and lean against the counter.

The surface is littered with glass bottles and plastic cups, the marble sticky. I take this chance to be alone for a second, trying to catch my breathe and focus on anything other than how I'm holding Connor back. I know that me leaving is going to destroy him, that's obvious in the way he looks at me when we talk about it. Or the thoughts he shares with me on the topic. Connors just to sensitive to be in a long distant relationship, no matter how rude that may sound.

There's so many things I love about my precious Con, his sensitivity being one of them, but sometimes I wish he wouldn't be so emotional. I blame his dad and his uncle for that. His uncle for crippling him for four years, and his dad for hating a part of his son he doesn't even know Connor keeps. All I'm doing is pushing him and I'm not strong enough to catch him if he goes to far. I grip the edge of the counter, a squishing sound coming from the action.

"Gross." I mutter but don't move my hands. I'm to entranced by my depressing thoughts. What's waiting for me in Australia? An old house and my grandpa? My mom says that I should be happy, that we're finally going home. But my home isn't a furnished two story shack, home is a boy. A boy is wild green eyes and a heart the size of China.

Home is getting a call at mid night because he needs someone to talk to when he's scared of what other people might think of him. It's swimming in the rain and feeling your heart beat painfully fast when he wraps his arms around you. It's that feeling you get when he says 'ours' or 'we'. It's knowing that your totally obsessed with someone to the point of it being weird. It's feeling insecure and scared until he looks at you and you're safe.

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