Dreaming with you

Chapter 16

 Amanda

"What do you mean a girl is gone?" I asked Damon, being slightly in shock.

"Just as I told you, I girl from university is missing, and I found out she is not the first one." He shook his head like he didn't believe it either.

"But how is now the first time I hear about it. A missing person Damon, it is serious." I started walking the room with my hand on my hips.

"Yes, and the police is covering it. They don't want to cause panic. They have patrols now everywhere, and I hope they are going to catch him or them soon. Until then I don't want you there. "

"How long is this going on?"

" A few weeks, I just found out few days ago. It's the reason I started looking for you. You have no idea how frightened I was when I couldn't find you."

"I am so sorry", I stopped to hug him." I just didn't want to wake buried memories." But as I hugged him I didn't think about the fall at all. I thought about missing girls and a small part of me wondered. But I pushed the thought away. I pushed it hard because there was no way Sebastian would do it.

"Do you need a help with that?", he pointed at my cut. I took bandage off when I was showering. It haven't healed yet, but hurt less than before.

He examined it and decided that it didn't need cleaning, but didn't like how it was sewed. "You are going to have a scar, he said through his teeth."

"Please, don't give me a lecture again. I know what I did. I promised it won't happen again. I learn from my mistakes."

"Regarding the mistakes.." he started but I cut him

"Don't. He is everything but that. And even if he is, let me make that mistake.

He sit on my bed next to me." Do you think he is worth it?"

"I have to believe he is. Do you know that feeling when you are with someone and deep inside you know that person is not right?"

"No", he answered.

"Of course you don't", I said and immediately regretted it. "Sorry, I didn't mean..."

"Its fine", he said standing, "I am a man whore. "

"Damon..." I started to say how he shouldn't talk like that but he didn't let me finish.

"We are not talking about my sex life now, Amanda. Yours is on the table. And I am serious now, just be safe. I can't be an uncle just yet. I am too young."

"Damon, I am shocked", I faked being insulted and I threw a pillow on him. "You are young to be an uncle? What about me being a mother? I am 19 for god's sake."

"I am well aware", he said while looking at the picture of us when we were younger which stood on my table by the bed. It was from out trip to south France. I don't remember it because I was only three at the time, but I guess Damon do, being five years older.

"Just don't do anything stupid", he said gentler than before.

"Don't worry, we didn't do anything. He respects me. And as I was saying, I don't have a feeling that something is wrong. I don't think if he is going to call, I don't feel insecure. I don't think he is going to replace me tomorrow. We just... are. Thrust me, I thought probably the same things you are now thinking, and he proved me wrong."

"I saw how he looks at you, I am not entirely sure I liked it. "

"How?" I dared to ask.

"I don't know, I can't explain. Don't rush into anything ok. And please, would you stay here?"

"No, Damon, I told you before, I am staying at his place. And I am going back to Oxford. I don't want to hide. I won't go anywhere alone, and Kelly and I will stay inside when the night falls until it is over."

"You are so stubborn", he exclaimed throwing hands in the air.

"The pot calling kettle black." I retorted.

"But you love me", he smiled.

"You wish."

It was our little inside joke. But it was true I loved my brother more than anything in the world.

"You know, to be true he looked little disappointed when you announced you will sleep here. He maybe really wants you close". Damon said that cautiously, like he was now trying to reassure me.

"I know that he does." I hope you will know the feeling someday, I added the words that never came out of my mouth.

"Enough with sentimental stuff. Its too late for that shit, and you little lady you need your beauty rest, and don't frown, you'll wrinkle before time." He messed my hair and went put.

"Jerk!" He knew how much I hate when he does that. I had very thick hair that easily get tangled.

But nothing could take away smile from my face 15 minutes later after I got message from Bastian.

I miss you already.

And I knew how much he hated phones so I was even happier because of that. I knew I was falling fast and hard, and soon I will be spiraling to the ground but I didn't care. For once in my life I was going to live in the moment. Not planning, not thinking. There was no better reason for that than love. And the situation required a little insanity, taking everything into consideration. I replied and went to the bed.

I fell asleep with stupid smile on my face wondering if Sebastian will ever dream of our future.

Next morning I just waited for my mother's reaction to yesterday's events. But she was calmer than I ever saw her. Which meant only one thing. I was so screwed.

But again, she surprised me by not saying anything. And against my better judgement, I just had to open my mouth.

"So, what do you think about Sebastian mom?" I asked trying to sound casual.

She raised her look from the newspapers she was reading for the last half an hour. "He looks really good."

"And?" Why was I pushing this?

"And he is a doctor", so I guess he is smart.

"He doesn't practice mom", just so you know.

"Still, he is a doctor. That's enough for me."

"You are not mad, him being who he is? He won't be teaching me for a long time", I tried to make it sound better.

"What you did Amanda was probably not the smartest thing to do, but putting that aside, I have nothing against the man." She put the paper down and took off her glasses. She had warm brown eyes, so unlike my own which were green like Dads. "Moreover I think it is good that he is older, he won't behave like a stupid teenager who wants to party all the time. Maybe you think I didn't notice but I know you didn't have much like when it comes to boys. I don't know why is that but I assume its not because your lack of interest, but their stupidity and bad behavior. Am I right?"

I was utterly stunned. I didn't expect this from my mother and suddenly I felt guilty for thinking all she cared is my education. "Yes, totally."

"So, be a smart girl, and don't let that man go away. I don't think you need to put much effort judging by the way he is around you."

"You really think so?" I really wanted her to support me.

"I am older than you honey. I see things you don't." She smiled knowingly. And take it from a heart surgeon, his heart is yours."