I want you....

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The next morning I knew what I had to do. I got out of Max’s bed and grabbed my phone punching in numbers. After the call I got dressed and woke Max up.

“Why are you up right now??” He moans and I stifle a laugh.

“Just get up and get dressed and you will find out.” I wait for him to get dressed. Taking in his muscular body I felt like I couldn’t breathe. He saw me gaping and grinned. I rolled my eyes before walking out.

 

My heart was pounding a million beats a second. My palms were sweaty and I felt a headache coming on. Max sat opposite me staring intently at my face. I avoided eye contact with him and just watched the door.  Finally the bell rang and Jay stepped inside. When he saw me his face lit up but it soon disappeared when he saw Max.

He came over and smiled politely at us.

I took a deep breath and observed the two men while they were looking at the menu deciding what to order.

“Okay, so this next couple of minutes may be the hardest of my life. I’m going to just come out and tell you both the truth before this goes public.” I say breaking the silence once they ordered. They both nod their heads in unison.

“I – I- I love you both. I know this may sound weird and everything but I do. Jay we have been together through a lot. We had our ups and downs but we still came through. Max, you have been my friend since day one, we got along great, you were like the male version of me minis the drinking. I thought it would only be fare if I came clean so that I didn’t hurt you guys.” I didn’t know what to say. Words filled my brain but nothing came out. I looked over at Max and I knew I should tell Jay the truth.

“Jay, that night I came home, before I left Max told me how he felt about me. We kissed and I told him I feel the same way.” I saw Jay stiffen and prepared myself for an outburst but nothing came.

“So you’re saying that you love him as well as me??” Jay asks, confusion clouding his face.

“Yes…” Before I could finish Jay has stood up. He looked at me with anger and resentment on his face.

“Well choose quickly. I don’t want to be strung along forever. You think you’re all cool having two pop stars in love with you.” His words cut deep and I fight the tears away.

“You think I asked for this to happen? Do you think I like it?? I don’t! You know what...” I grabbed the two-pound ring he got me until we could get a real one.

“Take it, I don’t want it. I don’t want you anymore. You are a horrible person. You make me feel worthless. If it weren’t for Max I would have married you. And then where would we have ended up?? You beating me up every night I wouldn’t let you have sex with me. I love you Jay, I always will but we can’t be together until the old you comes back or maybe ever again.” My heart feels heavy but I know I made the right choice.

I can see Jay clenching his fists.

“But don’t let me come between your friendship. If that happened I could never forgive myself.” I plead and he nods before leaving the café and my life.

I glance over at Max.

“Can we go home please??” I ask and he nods before getting up and taking my hand.

 

 

Waking up I felt strong arms around me. I start to panic when I think about being in Jay’s arms and him hurting me.

I look over and sigh in relief. I come face to face with Max. My smile coming back. His face looked peaceful. I trailed my fingers over his face until he woke up and looked me in the eyes. He smiled back at me before leaning in for a kiss.

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