Love Me Harder✔

fifteen

{edited}

father tell me, we get what we deserve

oh we get what we deserve

and way down we go

___

Seven Months Later...

"Are you ready to go home?"

I looked at my dad and I smiled. I smiled a genuine smile, a smile that actually felt real. I helped him load my bags into the back of his car and nodded, "I am. I missed everyone."

Dad smiled back at me. "Everyone missed you too, especially me, kiddo."

He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and we walked to the passenger side of the car. A nurse, that spent seven months with me, came out to me and my dad. "Don't forget to take these. If you're feeling down or are feeling any harmful urges, take two of these. Only two. My number is on the back if you need anything. The prescription only needs refills when empty. If that happens, call the doctor and he'll refill them. Stay safe, Darcy."

I hugged Lynn goodbye and took the medication from her and the paperwork. Dad also hugged her goodbye and thanked her for everything. He took the medicine from me and placed it in the back with my bags. He shut my passenger door and then got into the drivers seat. 

"How's Buttercup?" I asked, missing her so much. Pictures weren't doing me any justice. We had gotten her right after Uncle Zayn passed away to help cope with the loss. I haven't seen her in a few months and I miss her so much. 

"She's doing amazing. She loves LJ's dog, Jane. They have play dates all the time. She sleeps on your bed every night, I think she misses you just as much."

I smiled and looked out the window, watching the place I was in for seven months get smaller and smaller as we drove away. 

I looked down at my wrist and touched all the hospital bands that were wrapped around it. There were three of them; one with my name and important information, one for being suicidal, and one for self harming. 

I looked back up and out the window, the hospital out of sight. One thing's for sure, I don't ever want to go back there. I'm happy and I just hope that stays like that. 

***

 Seven Months Ago...

"Darcy! Darcy! Oh god, not again. Please, please, please, please, no! I can't lose you too. I already lost Kaylee and Zayn. Wake up! WAKE UP!"

*

Something was beeping. There was pain in my chest and there was pain on my wrists. I'm not sure if the pain in my chest was physical or emotional. The pain on my wrists was from the cuts, I'm so sure. 

I woke up breathing and alive, so I'm guessing whatever I did, I did it wrong. 

I looked around the pale grey/blue room and my eyes burned. The lightening hurt and the beeping was getting annoying. I looked down and saw stitches and gauze's lining my arms. There was an i.v. going into the top of my hand. I went to pull it out but a hand stopped me. Looking up, I saw Derek staring down at me. 

"Don't do it, Darcy." He pried my fingers away from the wires and placed my hands by my sides, "What did you do?"

His voice cracked and I looked away, staring out the window, wondering how it would feel to jump out. "I did nothing."