I Want Her

Don't promise me

Monday morning came and when Stevie arrived at work, she found a vase on her desk, with the most beautiful red roses she had ever seen. She didn't have to rack her brain, trying to figure out why they were presented to her or more by whom. She put her handbag away and picked one flower out of the bouquet. She ran her fingertips over the petals, inhaling the scent. Sighing, she put the rose back in with the others, deciding it was time to see Lindsey.

She knocked on his door and heard him allowing her to come in. "Stevie..."

"Hey." She closed the door behind her and took unsure steps towards him. "Thank you for the flowers, they're beautiful."

"You don't have to thank me, I was trying to apologize."

"I realized." She folded her arms, still avoiding looking at Lindsey. 

"We need to talk, but not now. How about I take you out to lunch?"

"Fine." She gave a small nod and added before leaving. "Just don't forget about it."

The words stung him, but he knew she was feeling far worse. 

The hours were ticking away slowly, too slow. Lindsey wanted his chance to apologize and explain himself, hoping Stevie hadn't decided yet to distance herself from him again. Just before 12, he was walking to the front desk, telling Stevie they were going now. A place they were headed to wasn't far from the office, so instead of driving, they got there on foot, Lindsey feeling anxious and Stevie not saying one word.

Lindsey suggested a table in the corner and Stevie just followed, her attitude making him all the more nervous. He was sure they were over before they even began. He didn't ambush her right away, letting her at least stick the fork into her salad, before he opened his mouth.

"I didn't forget to call you, I simply didn't want to upset you, because I was really angry."

"Why?"

"When we parted at the airport and came home, Bridget barely acknowledged me and uh... that got me mad and I went off on her. I said that we hate each other and I'm not sure why we're still married, I said I wanted to end it. Clearly she has a different idea... Honestly, I don't know why she wants to be with me still, but she threatened me with her father again and I just... I was so torn inside, when she mentioned him. I slammed the door and left."

"How did she exactly threaten you with her father?"

"Everything I have right now is because of the money he gave me. I already told you about it, I just... I failed to mention that if I want to move on from that horrible family, first I have to by myself out of that old bastard."

Stevie couldn't help but think Lindsey hadn't been honest with her from the start and it irked her greatly. "I thought the firm was yours."

"Well, I'm more like the face of it." He said, hanging his head low. "I do run it, I make all the decisions, but ultimately the business belongs to Bridget's father."

"What did you tell her? Did you explain why you want to leave her?"

"I did, I told her I'm in love with you."

She put the fork down, suddenly losing her appetite. "How do you imagine me working for you now? Every time she comes to the office, I'm the first person she sees, Lindsey. I'm sure she despises me. I... I can't do this, I just can't." She shook her head, running a hand through her hair. "The only reasonable thing to do now is for me to quit."

"No! You will not do such thing, Stevie. I'm not going to let you go. It's not the first time, okay? Really... Apparently she had quite an idea about you anyway." As soon as he said it, Lindsey cursed himself, she did not need to know that.

"How freaking delightful! Just what does your wife think of me?"

"It doesn't matter, she doesn't matter."

"Tell me or I'm walking."

"Stevie, no... It's not nice."

"Yeah, I've kind of gathered that."

"She said, she thought you were after me from the start, add some name calling to it..." Her eyes brimmed with tears and Lindsey reached for her hand. "Please, don't cry. I hate to see you upset."

"It hurts." Stevie shrugged, using the paper napkin to dry under her eyes. "I had no intentions of that sort. I needed a job, you gave me it. That's as far as we were supposed to go."

"I know, but... well, here we are."

"I have feelings for you, Lindsey, but I don't think I can do this. I can't have an affair with you, it's too complicated."

"I'll think of something. I'm forced to make a decision between my career and you, and..."

"And you have to make sure which one is more important. I refuse to be a dirty secret. I told you I would wait, but something gives me the idea that right now, you're leaning more towards your work than me, so... I don't know." She shrugged, pulling her hand away from his. "I think it would be best if I backed off, before I'm in too deep."

"Don't say that. Stevie, you are important to me. I can't see you go, I hate to even think of you leaving me. It's been such a short period of time, but while you can still back off, I'm already in too deep. I'll... I'll find a solution to this. I'll manage to gather the money to be free from that asshole. I'll take out a loan, I'll sell everything I own, I'll ask my own family for help... But I'll do it. I promise-"

"No, Lindsey. Don't promise me, don't swear anything to me. Just do it and when it happens, then we can talk. But before something does happen, there will be nothing going on between you and I."

"Don't do this, Stevie, please... There is no way back for me, don't you get it? I can't imagine not being able to kiss you and hold you, and just be near you anymore." He pleaded, but she shook her head.

"First, you divorce your wife, then we can talk about us."

It was obvious to Lindsey he wasn't going to win anything, so best would be to let it go for now. Although, he knew that she was acting, trying to appear strong willed, but if that time in New York they spent together told him anything, he was sure she wasn't going to be able to keep that up for too long.

"Thanks for lunch." She said dryly.

Leaving enough money to cover the bill, Lindsey followed after Stevie, with a heavy sigh.