I'm Starving For Affection

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"You can't just sit there and feel sorry for your self." Damien says to Nova who was moping around her house with a cigarette lit. "I can do whatever I want." She snapped "Then until you get your shit together you're out of the band. We'll hang out still but you'll have no say on what goes on with the band." He knew they'd have to stop by frequently to check on her. Damien knew first hand what happens when Nova's alone while she's in this state of mind. "Fine." Nova hung up the phone and growled. She was so frustrated with her self. She felt like she couldn't do anything right. Nothing was going the way she wanted.

While all of this was going on Anthony was regretting telling Nova he didn't love her. He wanted nothing more than to be holding her. He didn't know how to approach her after what he said. He knew she was upset and probably hated him. There wasn't anything he could do at this point, he fucked up.

Nova woke up the next afternoon to a knock at the door. "Who is it?" She asked from her spot next to Harley on the couch. She didn't hear anything so he sighed and up to answer, only to see Dakota. "Can I come in?" He asked. She hesitated a moment.. "Yeah whatever." She walked away from the open door and picked up a cigarette pack and pulled on out. "I want to apologize." Nova looked up at him, "Oh you do? I accept your apology lets fuck." "That was easier than I expected." Things progressed and got serious quickly. Nova did two lines of coke with Dakota. She wasn't herself. Maybe if she was she would have thought she wouldn't have gone to that extreme of lengths, just for a guy.

A month had passed and Dakota and Nova were dating. But something was wrong. They were arguing over and over again. "You seriously can't even do anything right! You fucking bitch!" Dakota yelled. "Seriously, what'd I do now? Not fill your sippy cup up enough with some more fucking alcohol?!" "Shut the fuck up. I'm so goddamn sick of you. That's why I cheated on you. That's why Cameron beat you! You're a no good worthless whore!" Nova stood there shocked by his words. A few minutes later she spoke "Get out." She said calmly. "Gladly." Dakota said slamming the door behind him.

After he left Nova broke down in a fit of tears, she couldn't breath. She felt like she was drowning again. She fell to her knees and just screamed in frustration. She couldn't do anything right, she was worthless, she doesn't deserve to live. At least that's what she thought. She got up abf went to her room. Searching through her desk drawers she found her razor. She stood there and looked at it in her hand 'do it' the voice in her head taunted. She took a deep breath and took the blade to her wrists. When she was done she came to her senses and rushed to stop the bleeding, but this time she couldn't. The blood just kept flowing out of her arm dripping on to the sink. she started to feel dizzy and ended up falling with a loud thump making Harley start barking at her bathroom door. She heard someone come in downstairs then rush to the bathroom, but everything went black.

Nova opened her eyes to reveal she was in the hospital. She looked at her left arm and saw the white bandage. She sighed and put her head back. She wanted to cry. For a moment while she was on her bathroom floor she kinda hoped it was the end, but who saved her. She looked over and saw Anthony sleeping in the faux leather hospital recliner in her room. "He isn't who found you." Damien said. "Then who was it?" Nova asked. "It was your dad. He came to surprise you. He's in the cafeteria." Nova began to cry. "How'd he find out?" She said referring to Anthony. "After your dad called me I told him. He isn't why you did it right?" Nova shook her head. "I just broke. I didn't mean for it.." she started crying hard making a nurse come in to fill her IV up with medicine to calm her down, but she had a attitude. "Don't let her attitude get to you. You had us worried. I cleaned it up Nova and im honestly traumatized. I never thought I would have to do that. Especially for you. You're stronger than that and you know it."

It was too late for Nova to hear his words of encouragement she was asleep. Damien sighed and left the room. It was one in the morning and everyone that knew nova were in the waiting room. He walked in and they all looked up. "She was awake but she had and episode and the nurse gave her medicine. So she's asleep again and probably will be all night." Just as he said that Nova's childhood best friend ran in the doors with tears streaming down her face. "She's okay right?" Damien nodded, "She's fine Jade don't worry."

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