All the Waters of the Earth

Chapter 14: It Is So Ordered

The courthouse in Santa Barbara was an old, historic, 1920s Spanish-style edifice that took up most of an entire city block. A grand building, with the traditional red tile roof and white stucco, you walked on large, terracotta tiles to your courtroom, and as you did this, your heels clicked and echoed in the corridors. It was the ultimate indoor-outdoor building, with virtually no security because many of the downstairs hallways lacked a wall on the inside, instead opening to a courtyard in the middle. In keeping with the style, heavy, dark wood furniture, massive doors, and signs painted in the distinctive Santa Barbara font served as decoration. It was a tourist destination, centrally located, where one could go in and look at old murals and tapestries, or walk in the gardens with lush landscaping. But if your fucking ex, who didn't care about the welfare of your child, forced you to go here during Christmas break, it sucked balls.

I walked up to the courtroom with Amelia, who was pulling a wheeled black briefcase behind her that clacked over the mortar of the terracotta flooring. She looked tough, no nonsense, in a dark skirt suit. I felt proud and confident that she was my lawyer, but I was still scared at what was going to happen today. She gave me instructions.

"No matter what happens, I don't want you to have any reactions to what Carlos says. I don't want you to roll your eyes or sigh or do anything like that," she said. "Remember that the judge is watching you and you want to be on your best behavior."

I nodded, but it was going to be difficult to do what she said. The challenge arose immediately because Carlos stood outside the courtroom, to the left of the door, presumably waiting for his attorney. Jake stood to the right of the door. The league of men in my life.

Twelve years after we dated, Carlos remained very handsome, although now he gave off the aura of a used car salesman. He had always dressed nicely, and today was no exception. Clearly wanting to impress, he wore a shiny, light gray button down shirt, with a matching tie and black slacks. He reeked of cologne or aftershave, with a sharp haircut and a slim physique.

Following Amelia's instructions, I ignored him. That was hard to do. I really wanted to tell him that he had no right to do what he was doing. That I thought he had an ulterior motive. That I didn't believe him. That he had not shown one iota of interest in Roberto until recently, and that this was just a ploy to stop paying child support. I kept my tongue, however.

While to me, Carlos looked like a bit of a snake, Jake, on the other hand, looked really imposing. He wore business suits as if he had been born in them, but today, he looked like a statesman. Grim, he shook Amelia's hand, but barely acknowledged me. Amelia had made me sign a written consent for Jake to testify, which I had done early that morning. It felt so strange to have him here when I had hardly talked with him. But I crossed my fingers and hoped that it would turn out okay. I had my excellent attorney and my regal neighbor on my side.

At least I assumed Jake was on my side. I hadn't talked with him about the testimony. Last night, Jake took the papers, stared at them, then muttered a "goodnight" to me, closing the door behind him before I could properly thank him for watching Roberto. I went to bed dreading the next day. While if I lost, it didn't mean that I lost Roberto forever, it would mean that this Christmas, I wouldn't have him with me and my heart could not take any more bruising.

The bailiff unlocked the courtroom and we filed in. Amelia explained that our hearing was the only matter "on calendar" that morning so we sat at the tables in front of the judge. Since Jake was a witness, he did not come in with us. Carlos sat at the other table with his attorney, an older man.

And the clock ticked.

Carlos whispered in his attorney's ear and his attorney whispered back.

The clerk shuffled papers.