Chapter 21: Good enough

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Becca's P.O.V
"So you're telling me that you are breaking up with Noah Jackson. The bad boy of the school who is completely smitten with you, because you think you're not good enough?" Stacy exclaims. Last night, he slipped a note under my door.
It said.
I believe in you. I believe in us. I love you. I miss you.

I felt like my heart was collapsing in tiny million pieces. "No, Stacy, I am saying that we are too different. We are like opposites." I argued.
"Opposites attract." she replies.

Why is she being so hard on me? "Only in stories, Stacy." I sighed. She shakes her head and gestures towards a couple kissing.
"The guy is a complete nerd, but look the girl is Sadie's best friend, Amber." she points out.

"The entire school is in love with Noah." I said, rolling my eyes.
"Not me, not the guys, not the lockers." she replied.
"Um, who was the one squealing about Noah stopping by my locker?" I ask, exasperated.

"I was squealing, because I totally saw that you guys had this chemistry." she says.
"We didn't really talk, you know?" I groan.
"I know you didn't really talk, but his eyes were twinkling and you were cold towards. I was guessing that you were trying to hold back your feelings or something." she said.

"Maybe he just wanted me in bed." I shot back.
"Look, I getting pissed here. Noah is completely smitten with you and here you are complaining about how you are not good enough for him. Then be good enough for Him!" snaps Stacy.

"You don't understand Stacy!" I yell.
"It's you who doesn't understand!" she yells.
"I though you were my friend! Friends understands each other!" I cried, annoyed.

"I am! I am trying to help you!" she argues.
"I don't need any help. I am fine!" I yell.
"Why do you push the people who care about away? Noah, me and your mom!" she explodes and leaves my bedroom.

The last time we had a fight was when we were five. I don' t push away people. Do I?
I walk down to the kitchen to get a glass of water to clear my mind.

'Honey, she's right, you know. I know you don't mean to. You are a very private person. You just scared to trust people, because they might leave, right?" Mom said, coming in. I sighed. I bury my face.
" I am just like dad, right?" I say.
"No, actually, I was like that." she replies. I lift my face out of hands and looked at mom.

"No way, you are so outgoing!" I gasped.
"I wasn't until I met your father." she says, calmly.
"So dad helped you?" I ask.

"Yes, he helped me see that I wasn't what I thought I was and that he was proud of me." she replies.
"It's hard, mom." I said.
"I know, honey. Just know that we care about you. Noah does, too." she tells me.
I believe in you. I believe in us. His words dawn to me as I let mom's words sink into me.

Oh my god! What have I done? I run up the stairs. I phone Stacy.
"Yes?" Stacy replies. Scary.
"Stacy, I am so sorry. You're right. I want to become better for him." I whispered into the phone.
"Meet me in the mall in ten minutes, max." she replies and hangs up.

My best friend is back. This is the longest fight ever! I head to the mall.
I run over to her and give a huge hug. She hugs me back.
"So let's start with your clothes." she says.

I have always wore baggy clothes, partly because I didn't want to look slutty, but also because well I thought I was fat. It became a habit, until now. She passes me a tank top and a skirt. The skirt is almost as short as the skirt I wore when Noah and I returned home.
"Try this on." she says. I eye it, nervously. Stacy pushes me into the changing stall, before I can change my mind.

I try it on. The skirt doesn't look so bad. I pull off the tank top from it's hanger and look at it. It so revealing! I put on the tank, avoid look at the mirror and come out. Stacy grins as she sees me. "Sexy Lady" she remarks, stretching the dy. I blush.
Soon I am holding bags and bags of clothes. "Becca, you know that there's a homecoming dance, soon?" she asks.

"No, there is?" I replied. She nods.
"When?" I ask.
"Next Friday, are you going?" she questions.
"I dunno." I answer. We decided that we'll attend it anyway, even without dates.
Noah's words run around my head again and again. I believe in us, too.


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