Grey

7.

I never really liked nightmares, as if someone actually likes them. It just gives me the chill, it gives flashbacks to things I'm not thinking about remembering, it gives a play by play again and again like it needs to be remembered for the rest of my life and I guess I'm not growing old without my nightmares, it'll never grow out off me.

Having remembered my parents is the most terrible part of my life, not that they were abusive when on my childhood but because of their death - the cause of their death. I moved to New York to start again but then the nightmares come and go and it was a very horrible experience for me, considering the fact that I was alone, but then Nicholas came and I thought everything was alright, or I thought it was.

I sat up suddenly and sat upright on the bed, clutching my chest. The bright sunlight from outside was blinding me. I looked around the room seeing everything was alright. I tried to calm myself down as my heart won't stop beating hardly out of my chest. I laid down on the bed again as you shuffle beside me.

The air became tense around me, everything felt out of place all of a sudden. Beads of sweat were running down my back.

A nightmare again.

I moved closer to you, the warmth of your body was radiating that I could feel them against my own skin, I removed a piece of your hair away from your eyes as you stirred in your sleep and finally opened them, your violet and gold eyes staring back at mine.

"Goodmorning." You said in a very deep voice.

"Morning." I replied.

"Is there something wrong?" You suddenly asked when you detected a slight bit of worry and horror in my face.

"I just didn't slept that well." I said as your arms pulled me closer in the embrace we're already in.

"Did you had a nightmare again?" You said, this time a little louder.

"Yeah." I said with a sigh.

There was a long pause before you whispered "I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry Nick?" I asked looking intently in your eyes.

"Because no matter how horrible my life has been, I never had to go through everything you had experienced, I never had to see both my parents slowly dying in front of me, I never had to move somewhere else just to simply forget and move on, and most especially I never had to feel what you have felt all these years."

I burst into tears after you said that. Your retelling of my story was just painful but really honest, which caused to open my wounds once again. And with that I pushed my lips to yours as the tears won't stop falling from my cheeks.

I wished that you didn't have to be sorry because I wanted you to be happy for some reason and because I needed you to be. I needed the love to seal those wounds again. I needed you.

And it was amazing how you stayed with me through it all and never complained about me blabbing about my parents non stop and that's what I needed the most, I needed someone to listen and most especially to accept me, I stuck to that notion and you became persistent on being my shield, you never stopped comforting me.

And I realized that we both needed each other, we were the missing puzzle pieces to complete each others puzzles and once you've completed me, that piece stayed forever.

That missing piece was glued forever in my heart, that piece made me.

And that piece was you.

***

I paid the cabbie and thanked him before jumping out of the taxi. I pulled my jacket closer to my body as a cold wind blew against my skin which caused me to shiver. Even through the cold I could feel my cheeks flushing creating a small tint of blush forming. I blew on both of my palms before rubbing them together and stuffed them on my jacket pocket.

I walked slowly towards the next block where I could almost see the apartment building from where I was stood. My new apartment was just near our old one, after you left I made up my mind to leave too. Our apartment gave me too much to remember and I don't like that pretty much.

And I was hoping that this time you would come for me.