Redeeming Love (Sequel to More than Friends- Lauren Cimorelli Fanfic)

Forever Burned

Lauren's POV

Josh coming to my show last week has been messing with my head. I couldn't stop thinking about him. He looked so different. He was the same height, he was tall but now he was built. He had a light scruff beard and his his hair was short on the sides and longer on the top. (See pic above)
He looked so much different, so much more mature. But there were two things that didn't change. His dimples that always seemed to make you want to smile. And those electric blue eyes that I had memorized. The ones that looked at me like I was important and made me recognize that I was worthy. Those eyes were forever burned in my mind.
I shouldn't be thinking about him. He has a girlfriend and I just got out of a relationship with my ex Tyler. I should be focused on enjoying being single and working on my music. My life is different.
But no matter how wrong it was for me to be thinking about Josh I couldn't stop replaying those few minutes that we had seen each other last week.
What I had with Tyler was nice, he just wasn't the guy for me. Tyler was a little bit older than me. He's 23 and I'm 21. He has been trying to reach out and fix things with us but I just didn't share the same feelings he did.
The only person I've ever truly loved is Josh. And now he's moved on with some girl that he met in Miami. He's moved on when all I've done these past 3 years is try to forget how much I loved him, how much I regretted leaving him.
Now he's coming back to Nashville and even though I missed him, seeing him without getting to share my life with him could be harder than trying to forget him. With him coming back, I'll have a constant reminder that I've lost the person I love most.
Drew and Robert only live 3 streets down from where me, dani and Lisa live. It's going to be just like how it was right before he left. We will be so close together but emotionally so far apart.

There have been so many nights I stayed up wondering how he was. If he was happier in Miami than he was in Tennessee. If he left because I made him that miserable.... If he would ever forgive me.
I started thinking these things so often that I was driving myself crazy. I've told my sisters that I'm fine and moved on in hopes that it would one day be true. But seeing him again is a reminder that I'm not even close to getting over him.

But last week. Those few minutes. They made me happier than I have been in a long time. He was capable of making me happy without even knowing it. But now he is with another girl. One who must make him happy, when all I did was break him and myself. She probably makes him happy in a way that I couldn't.
I hope she is good for him. I hope she appreciates him and loves him the way he deserves. I hope she is kind and gentle hearted like he is. I hope that she brings him more joy than he could ever think was possible.
That's all I want, is for him to be happy. If anyone deserves happiness it's him.

That's my biggest regret, taking his happiness. And unknowingly messing up my own at the same time.