Camastoo: Our Life

...Sorrow is sickening...

"I'm afraid Camille that if this pregnancy continues the way that it's going, you are going to lose the baby" Louisa looked into my eyes with great sorrow and I could tell that it was real from the way she stood, the slouch that she had walked into the room with was a give away.
Arastoo had arrived around ten minutes after being called, he was good like that. Punctual. I was squeezing his hand hard trying to stop myself from crying at the dilemma that had been placed in front of me.

"Could you not pump nutrients to the baby?" I asked with as much hope as I could muster, Arastoo had not said a word since arriving and it was scaring me. His face remained calm but it was just a mask for the real emotion that was hiding beneath.
"That could be a possibility, but it could never be a permanent solution!" Louisa nodded, the look of sorrow remained in her eyes.
"We'll do it until the morning sickness stops, it will only be a few more weeks and I can deal with that!" I looked at Arastoo again tears ran slowly down his face and then he looked at me.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have shouted this morning, I shouldn't have directed my anger at you!" His face was no longer the mask he had walked in with, his features were crumpled and tears were streaming quickly down his face.

"It's okay, this isn't anyone's fault! Nobody could have predicted how bad it could get!" The thought of losing my unborn baby was beginning to sink in, I was having trouble breathing evenly and it was beginning to burn my throat.

The tears were falling quickly down both mine and Arastoo's faces and it was getting harder and harder to concentrate. There were people coming into the room, they were saying stuff that I couldn't hear and Arastoo was agreeing to whatever was they were saying. The taller one of the the two lady's that had come in came over to me.

"Are _ ready to _?" I couldn't concentrate on her words and I was begin to panic, my breathing was getting shallow but I nodded my head in presumption that I was being taken to a hospital room were I would be able to calm myself and Arastoo down. The smaller of  the two lady's walked out and returned with a wheelchair.
Arastoo and the taller nurse lifted me into the chair, it was uncomfortable and my laboured breathing was beginning to wear me out. Arastoo checked my pulse, there were still tears streaming down his face.

Arastoo's P.O.V
"It's very quick!" I say between sniffles to the nurse pushing the small wheelchair that carried my weak looking fiancé. I hated seeing Cam like this, it was worse than the first time and I wasn't even really there for that. Cam had gone through so much in silence and now she was going through much worse but with people who knew what was happening.
Cam was hardly breathing as we reached the lift, her room had already been set up for her and oxygen was in high supply. Tears were slowly making there way down her beautiful face; she was in pain. If our baby died Cam would never forgive herself and I wouldn't be able to watch her tear herself apart. The physical pain she was feeling was no match for the brain hollowing emotional pain that had built up in Cam for the last couple of days. I shouldn't have yelled and I shouldn't have blamed her for her sudden loss of appetite.

By the time the lift came it felt like we'd waited an eternity, Cams tear stained face was now pale as she held a oxygen mask against it. She was a complete wreck and I couldn't help her.

We wheeled her into the large lift and I glanced a look at nurse Louisa as the doors closed and we awaited the opening again.Cam could no longer hold the mask to her face so one of the nurses strapped it on, Cam's eyelids were beginning to droop as we arrived at the maternally ward. She was rushed to her assigned room, I was left behind as a male nurse approached me with what seemed like millions of papers to sign. I was quickly left behind.

Doctor's P.O.V
The patient that lay in front of me was a Miss Camille Soroyan, her breathing was laboured and her pulse quick and erratic. Her baby although small for the expected size at her stage of pregnancy, was not in any kind of distress. We were quick to get a echo for her lungs as we were still unsure of the cause for her breathing problem. After finding no physical problem, we came to the conclusion that it was what was originally expected - a panic attack. Camille finally began to calm down after much encouragement from her partner. Her breathing levelled out and we were happy to leave the room. We would return later to discuss Camille's decision on our medical intervention of her pregnancy.

Cam's P.O.V
Everybody who looked at me had sorrow in their eyes, and not just I'm sorry your in hospital eyes - I'm sorry your baby's dying eyes. True, pure and sickening sorrow. I was fed up of it, I was trying to be positive and think of all the things that could go right but every time I caught a glance at someone staring at me, the negativity returned.

Angela and Brennan would visit me once a day, sometimes together but most of the time apart. They didn't have the sorrow in their eyes, they were supportive and never looked at the possibility of me losing my unborn baby. Sorrow is sickening, it makes you feel uncertain and like everybody thinks they know when they don't. I wasn't ready to give up, I would never be ready to give up. I started being given various pills, I was having stuff pumped to the baby and everyday they would try to give me solids in the hopes that eventually I wouldn't throw them back up. But everyday there was the burning sensation at the back of my throat until today - 12 weeks and 4 days pregnant, the nurse walked in with the tray of food like they did everyday. I picked the food I would like to try, today I picked the small grilled sandwiches that had been placed onto the tray, I took a small bite and shallowed it, my stomach rumbled but was soon to settle. I took another small bite, then another and another before I knew it I had finished the sandwich and went on to have a whole meal.

Arastoo is currently staring at me, a content smile has settled on his face and Ryan is now fast asleep in his arms. This is what the word bliss is used for, when silence is all you need you know your around the right people. The beauty of love, you don't appreciate anything until your think your going to lose it. Lives are precious, people are precious and love is precious. Funny how it can all come crashing down so very quickly.

"Charge to 200!" ... "clear!"

Okay guys I hope you enjoyed that, a little treat on BONES (English Time) DAY. I hope you guys are liking this story so far - I don't know how you feel about it because you don't tell me!
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