Resume, delete, begin again | an olicity au

Chapter 3

As a rolled back to my room tears still ran down my  face. My eyes were red and stung from all the crying, but right now, it was the least of my concerns. I had to be strong, for her. It's what she would want. I was never the kind of guy to cry, and in the last couple hours I had cried more than I had in my entire 21 years of life.  The x Rays were quick, the nurse told me she would tell me the results as soon as the doctor read them. In the mean time I sat in my room, looking down at my hands. The hand that had left the steering wheel for less then half a minute, the hands that had caused all this pain to occur.
And all of a sudden a rush of anger bursted out of me, like a wave that had just hit the shore. And I yelled
"God! Agh" punching the wall beside me, making a small dent in the wall, and then followed by a scream of pain as I was sure I had damaged my knuckles. And again I broke down, as I saw the image of my angel on the bed, alone, and how it was all my fault. Last night was supposed to be the happiest night of my life, to celebrate my love and I and now, less then 24 hours later we are here, at the hospital not knowing what was next, not knowing what to expect.

Soon enough the doctor returned.
"Mr queen we have good and bad news" said the doctor.
"I'll take the good news first. It tends to soften the blow of the bad news" I said remembering Sara's clever words.
"The good news is that you'll be up and running, meaning perfectly functioning in around a week. You sprained your ankle and have a couple flesh wounds that aren't that bad"
"That's good" I said, now expecting the bad news.
"The bad news however is we still do not know ms lance's condition or when she'll wake up."
My head dropped. I mean, I guess I should have expected it, but it was still heart breaking not to know how my baby was... How she was doing.
"I need some time to process" I said to the doctor.
"Of course mr queen. Please tell me if you need anything." He said nodding, looking down at his clip board once more before walking to leave
"And please tell me if you find anything else out about Sara." I said with a pleading look in my eye, he turned his head nodded agian in reassurance, opened the door and left.
I sat there in the room for a long while. It felt like every passing minute was and hour and every passing hour was a day gone by. I was just thinking about her. What I would do in a world without her.

____________

Some time passed, and then more and more. It had been 2 weeks since the crash and I was at the hospital with her everyday, from morning to nightfall. I would hold her hand, her motionless hands, and I would talk to her. I don't know if she could hear me, if she could understand what I was saying but I talked to her anyway, just in case she could. 
"Please wake up baby. I love you too much to lose you. I can't lose you baby. You're my world, my life please don't leave me." I would tell her how much I missed her, how much I needed her, but she didn't wake up. And everyday day it got a little but harder. A little harder to survive in the cruel world with out my light. I was living in a world of darkness.

____________
I m not a religious person, never was, but at this point I was doing what ever I could to make her wake up. So as I walked through the Church doors, and saw it was empty. I went to the bench towards the back of the room I knelt down on one of the benches and closed my eyes. And I prayed. I prayed to god if he was out there to bring back my girl. To bring back my love to make her wake up. That I would do anything to bring her back. To tell her I love her and hear her voice. I prayed that I would see her again. 
When I was done, I stood,looked up at the cross and looked at Jesus and said
"bro to bro, I need you to help me, if what they say is true and you can perform miracles, Bring her back to me, if just for a second, bring her back". I turns my back and walked out of the church, the doors slamming behind me.