Burnt Out

22

"I'm leaving, right now, let's go." JJ stood in the movie theater bathroom as Wyatt tried to relax his best friends nerves. He shook his head at him.

"It's too late for that now bud. Leaving now will just piss off Chloe even more, and I'd rather not bail on Alexia." JJ listened to Wyatt's words as he stood looking in the bathroom mirror; the words just seemed to bounce back at Wyatt as if he was talking to a wall. JJ turned the faucet on and cupped his hands under the running water. Once his hands had filled and overflowed with water he splashed his face repeatedly. With each splash he had hoped at least one of them would wake him up somehow, so that all of this would be another twisted dream of his. JJ gave up on the water splashing and looked up to see himself in the mirror. He took one deep breath and stared into his own cold, lifeless eyes as if his face was a blank sheet of paper and his eyes were the pen that told the story that his mouth wouldn't. He smiled and looked at Wyatt.

"I'm ready." Wyatt looked at him with concern and wondered how JJ could flip a switch and become this whole other person opposite from what he felt.

"You sure JJ? I mean if-"

"No.....I'm ready. Lets go have fun and enjoy the movie." JJ turned around and as he was walking out he was met by Blaine and Zack.

"Blaine, Zack. I assume that your reasons for coming to the bathroom have nothing to do with actually using the bathroom." Blaine sighed and just looked at JJ as he avoided eye contact.

"JJ....I'm sorry.....I didn't know..." JJ shook his head at Blaine and stopped him from talking any further. If there was one thing that JJ hated, it was pity and help when he didn't want it. He wished people would just leave him alone and continue on with their own lives and find someone else to pity. JJ smiled.

"Blaine, dude stop I'm fine. Don't treat me like a victim of a crime, because I'm honestly fine and Chloe is entitled to making her own life choices." Blaine looked at JJ's reluctant yet reassuring smile and accepted it. Zack decided to speak up.

"Well JJ I've only known you for a little while, and if it's any consolation you're totally hot and seem like such a sweetheart." The words hit JJ and he forced another smile at them. "Great more pity" he thought to himself. People always thought it would make things better for him, but if anything it was just more salt in the wounds. Yeah hot, sweet, or whatever gracious word could be bestowed upon his being, was still not enough to suffice. So JJ thought words such as those were better left spared. Blaine turned to Zack and pinched him.

"Umm excuse me I don't need you gawking at other boys let alone one of my friends, babe. You belong to me haha." The four boys laughed and exited the bathroom as Alexia was standing next to Chloe and Ian who were holding hands as typical couples would do. Alexia looked at Wyatt who stood behind JJ, and they mentally signaled each other. She sent a look that beckoned the question if JJ was alright, and Wyatt shook his head no at her. She lowered her head and sighed. Alexia walked past JJ and lightly rubbed his arm and she looked at him and smirked. In response he half-heatedly smiled and withdrew his arm from the warmth of her touch, as if basking in his own coldness kept him calm. Any shift in his emotional or physical balance could throw him off and tear apart the already poor facade he had put on for himself. The group had finally found their way into the theater and they all chose seats. It went Ian, Chloe, Alexia, Wyatt, JJ, Blaine, and Zack. The movie started and the lights dimmed and JJ let out a breath as in the darkness he could finally relax his face from trying to keep a smile. He looked around him and felt as if everyone was talking about him or conspiring in some way. Paranoia ate at him as the movie started to play. It was about 15 minutes into the movie until JJ decided to take his first look down the isle to try and see Chloe. He saw her and Ian laughing and holding hands. Wyatt then punched JJ in the arm and JJ cussed at him in a whisper.