No Homo

We all fall down sometimes

Gaah another update ily you allll✨

Dans POV *slight trigger warning*

I'm running. Why am I running? I feel my feet grow heavy, my body demanding to stop but, my brain refuses. I feel so exhausted. I feel so cold. I feel everything around me go into slow motion. Next thing I know I'm on the ground. My eyelids grow heavy. Blackness.
I wake up. I'm at home. Why was I running? I pry my brain but, it won't give. I get out of my warm bed, my feet hitting the cold floor. I walk out of my room. Everything moving on its own. I walk to Phil's room. I knock. No answer. I open the door anyway. I walk into his room, it's so bright and filled with colors. But, there's no Phil. Where could he be?
I go to scream his name but my mouth won't open. My throat feels like it's closing. Where could he be? I walk out of his room. I hear the shower. I go into the bathroom. The door slowly creaking open. There he is. He's taking a bath, facing the other way. Must've fell asleep. He's so cute. I walk closer. I go to say his name but nothing comes out of my mouth. I turn him over. The bath is filled with blood, his pale skin paler and colder than usual. His eyes don't have that glow. The glow that's brung me so much happiness. The glow that lets me know he's ok. That he's actually happy. I panic. There's cuts littered everywhere. His body covered in them. Head to toe. I go to scream but nothing comes out yet again. I feel my breathing become rapid and heavy. He's gone. No. He can't be. I must be dreaming. I can't lose him. Oh god, oh god. Please, please tell me I'm dreaming.
I hear laughter. I can't bring myself to move. It's too painful. I keep staring at him. He can't be dead. He can't be. Fucking hell. I need to wake up. Make it stop. Make it stop!!

I shoot up. I get up ignoring my body's cry to stop. I grow dizzy but don't care. I turn to see Phil peacefully asleep next to me. I let out a breath. Thank god. He's ok. Thank god. I cuddle him close burying my face in his neck. I breathe in his scent and almost burst into tears. I feel him stir a bit under me. I slowly pull back but not fully still not wanting to let him go. I see Phil flutter his eyes open and rub them lightly in that childish way he always does. With his hands balled into fists. I smile at him and kiss his cheek. "Morning beautiful" I say and he giggles lightly "morningg" he mumbles out. After he finishes rubbing his eyes he looks at me and I see a little pout form on his lips. "You've been crying" he states and I nod not wanting to lie to him. "Why?" He says and cuddles me closer. "Nightmare" I state dully. He nods, "Wanna talk about it?" He asks and I shrug. He pecks my lips and I can't help but smile. "You basically killed yourself and I found you in the tub with blood for water and cuts everywhere" I choke out and he holds me tighter. "Well I can promise you that won't happen" he says and pecks my lips again. "Now how about we cuddle and watch a movie to cheer you up?" He says and I nod.

We get up and go into the living room. We both cuddle on the couch together just throwing on a random channel, not really feeling like watching a movie yet. I feel Phil cuddle closer to me and I can't help but smile at my amazing dork. I sit up a bit and straddle him. He pouts cutely and I smile more as I intertwine our hands and fingers. I lean down and connect our lips in a slow kiss. Everything seeming to be in slow motion. I bring him closer to me deepening the kiss. I feel moan slightly against my lips and can't help but smile a little. I pull back making him whimper cutely. I smile and peck his cheek. "Now how about that movie?" I ask making him pout and mumble out a small "Meanie". I chuckle and peck his lips making him giggle. 

~ 

After the movie

     I look down to see Phil asleep on my chest, "Little cutie" I whisper and peck his forehead. I pick him up and carry him to my room. My little angel. I lay him down under the covers and get in next to him. I hold him close to my chest and peck his forehead again. I wrap my arm around his small waist and feel sleep slowly take me over also. 

I'm in the bathroom again. Phil's body gone but the blood is still behind. I see the pictures flash in my mind. I almost cry. Why do I keep having these dreams?! Wait, no. They're nightmares. Not dreams. This isn't real. This isn't real. This isn't real. I hear an unfamiliar voice whisper, "It will be" 

....

I jolt awake, hyperventilating and sweating. I rub my eyes, tears. I look over and see Phil peacefully asleep. At least he's OK. He's OK. He's OK.. that's all that matters. I play with Phil's soft hair feeling myself get lost in his beauty like I always seem to do. He's just perfection. Now plan time.. I need to make sure Phil isn't cutting himself anymore... He's OK and I want to keep it that way. 

A/N: Hey guys! So just wanted to say a quick thank you to, ttroylernuggetss for helping me write this chapter <3 tysm. And also thank you to you guys, all my readers. I never thought I'd ever get more than 2 reads let alone over 900! So thank you all so much.