The Secret Life of the American Teenager: Aftermath

Chapter Ten

"Evan, could you give us a moment alone, please?" I ask him.

"Are you sure?" he whispers back.

I nod and he accepts my request and I hear him mumble an "excuse me" as he maneuvered around Ben. When the door was shut, Ben turned his full attention on me.

"You're pregnant! Is it with that worthless guy? Some guy you had to have just met? I thought you liked me. It was supposed to be US. WE were supposed to be together. That's how it's supposed to be. US. And you're ruining it with some guy's baby!"

"It's none of your business!" I shout back. "Nothing was EVER going to happen between us, okay? When are you going to stop being obsessed with me?!?"

"Amy, I'm in LOVE with you. We are meant to be together! Don't you see? It's just that you are messing it up! What are you going to do? Your life is over, congrats on being a slut."

My feelings are so hurt. I hate this Ben. Where's the one who stuck by my side my freshman year and got beat up for me?

"Ben, please, get out," I ask. I can't take this.

"No, Amy, you need to hear this, your life is rui-"

"BEN, get out, PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOU."

"Fine. Have fun with another baby you won't be able to take care of," he jeered and slammed the door shut on his way out.

I can't believe this. I can't believe any of this. Those words hit me like a knife in the heart. I couldn't help but question: were they true? Was I ruining my life? Was I slut?

I was stressing. Everyone always said stress wasn't good for the baby, so I try to calm down. I'm focusing on my breathing.

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

Since its Sunday, I don't have any classes. I decide to take a nap. I'm always tired lately. It's annoying quite frankly.

When I wake up, it's time to call John. I call him every other day and I feel so much delight when I hear his voice. My conversation with Ricky was practically scripted at this point.

"Hello Amy"

"Hi Ricky"

"How are you?"

"Good. You?"

"Good. And the baby?"

"Very good, thank you."

"Here's John"

Then he would hand the phone to John. Sometimes we'd talk for less than five minutes and sometimes we'd talk for almost a half an hour, it really just depends.

This call was no different. Ricky took him to the park today. My heart ached, because I wanted to take him to the park and push him on the swings. I missed him so, so much.

I knew at some point I was going to have to make a decision. A real one. Adoption or abortion were out of the question. Was I going to move back home? Stay here? How was I going to get money to raise him/her?

The thought of it just made my brain spin. Ugh.

I needed to eat something for dinner. I made myself a sandwich. I think I was going to study for psychology. I didn't have an exam coming up but he sure did love giving pop quizzes.

Tomorrow, I would go to classes again. I had an invite to a party on Thursday, but I didn't think I was going to go. There would probably just be a lot of beer and drunk people there, something that I was not interested in being around, pregnant or not.

I woke up the next morning, and immediately felt sick to my stomach. I didn't even make it to the bathroom before I threw up. Great, just great.

After I cleaned it up, I wrapped myself in a blanket on the couch. I felt a bit better now, so I was probably still going to go to classes today.

And I did. I only had a few, but still. It seemed like such a normal thing to do, but my life was anything but normal.

A thought occurred to me- John had never come an visited me. I really, really wanted him to. So I decided to call Ricky and see if it was possible to have him come and stay this weekend. He answered on the first ring.

"Hi Ricky"

"Hey Amy"

"I need to ask you something"

"Sure"

He sounded caught off guard. Here goes nothing I guess.

"Can you and John come down to visit? Possibly this weekend?"

"Well, Amy, I don't know-"

"Pleaasssssseee. I miss him so much. It'd be just for the weekend please!"

There was a long pause. He was thinking. Ricky needs to say yes. Please let him say yes.

"Okay"

I squealed in delight. I hear Ricky laugh a little bit at my excitement.

"See you then"

"See you then"

And then he disconnects. I jump up from the couch and do a little happy dance. I can't remember being this happy.

Suddenly, everything seems okay. I'm not worried about the baby or my classes or Ricky.

I'm going to get see my boy. The one I missed so, so, so much. Right now, that's all that matters.