Runt (BoyxBoy)

Chpater V

Although I told myself I would think of a way to make things better, no great ideas had popped into my head yet; and I was slowly beginning to feel ignored. Raven and Rowan would sit together on one of the couches while he would gently pet her head. To an outsider, it would look like a dog owner who was very fond of his pet, but to me, it was like a smack in the face from rejection.

I immersed myself in caring for the cubs. Even though I couldn't shift and run around with them, I could still watch over them. Four of them would play and fight each other, but Corrie would lie beside me comfortingly and rest her head on my lap. She would nip at my hand occasionally, resulting in a short tickle fight, but that was about it.

How I ached to have my hand heal and finally be able to get this stupid cast off. The pack doctor predicted another fortnight or so until I was able to run on all fours again, and kept the cast on me in case I couldn't resist the urge to morph into my wolf form. The break was healing nicely, but no one wanted me to push myself any time soon.

The two-week-long wait was slow and painful, but once my cast was off, I was so glad to be able to move again.

"Don't go doing anything reckless," the doctor ordered and I nodded.

When I arrived back at the main house, Raven was nowhere to be seen. I shrugged to myself. She was probably just out for a walk or something. It was my chance to finally see Rowan alone.

I knocked on the door of the study and opened it to find Rowan at his desk with his head in his hands. "Is something wrong?" I asked.

"Those hunters are back in the forest, again." He sighed.

I frowned. "Where's Raven?" I asked, heartbeat growing fast and unsteady.

Rowan stared at me. "Isn't she down stairs?"

I shook my head and ran out of the room. The doctors told us she was due any day now. If she had gone into the forest, I couldn't know what had happened to her - especially with those hunters around. I dived off the back porch and shifted, landing on four legs and letting my shredded clothes float down behind me. My left paw began to ache again, but I wouldn't let it get to me; I had to find Raven.

A gunshot went off not far from where I was, and something yelped. Birds flew out of the trees from the shock of the loud noise and I quickened my pace. Where are you, Raven? I asked, trying to communicate.

Here. A soft and weak voice sounded in my head.

I began to sniff the ground, looking for any sign of Raven's scent. Finally, I found it. It was strong and fresh, and it led me to something I had never wanted to see.

The grey wolf, Raven, lay against a tree, panting - breathing, but barely. She had successfully given birth to six cubs that were all desperately suckling for nutrients. It was heart warming, if it weren't for the gaping, bleeding hole that was blown through her pelvis.

Raven! I cried, running up to her.

She winced and started to whimper. I won't make it, Runt. She said, gesturing with her head to her wound. But you have to get the pups back to the house. I'm leaving them in your care.

I shook my head. She couldn't just leave me like this. I nudged her neck with my nose. You can make it. I'll call for help. I'll -

I said, save the cubs! She interrupted, trying to speak loudly. Raven collapsed back against the tree and breathed out. He breathing was getting slower, and the light was beginning to vanish from her eyes. You were my favourite... she took a deep breath. Little brother...

It took a moment for the realisation to hit me. I threw my head back and howled as loudly as I could, signalling for help. Two wolves, both red-brown in colour emerged from the bushes. I picked two of the tiny cubs up by their scruffs and ran as fast as I could, knowing that the two wolves would do the same.

I had to save the cubs. It was Raven's last request. I couldn't let them die. I arrived back at the house and lay the pups on the porch before shifting. The other wolves behind me also did so.

Willow ran into the house and, a minute later, came back out with some baby bottles and milk.

I sat on the porch and pulled one of the puppies into my lap, checking its vital signs. It was charcoal grey in colour and still alive. I passed it on to Willow and quickly grabbed the next one. Light grey in colour - dead. My tears were falling freely as I went for the next one. Russet coloured and alive; I sighed in momentary relief and passed it on. The black pup and the other light grey cub were also alive. I reached for the last cub. It was smaller than the others, the runt of the litter, and I mentally kicked myself for not checking it first. It was a light grey wolf with Rowan's red-brown gene streaked through it. It had a steady heartbeat, and wriggled when I turned it - him - around onto his back. I sighed again and stressfully ran a hand through my hair, and handed him to Willow.

Rowan had come to check on us and he saw my facial expression.

I scooped the cub that hadn't survived up into my arms and hugged it. It was my fault that it had died. If I had just listened to what Raven had said, it would still be alive.

Alpha sat next to me and rubbed my back soothingly. "We'll give it a proper burial when the hunters leave, okay?"

I nodded and sobbed, desperately hoping that everything would be okay.

"You know," Rowan said, trying to change the subject. "I'm not good with names. Can you do it for me?" He asked.

Smiling sadly, I nodded again. "At least wait until their eyes open." I said.

When the commotion died down, we invited the Red Wing pack up to hold a funeral for Raven and the deceased cub. Throughout the entire ceremony, Cole was fuming; but he didn't say anything. He didn't talk for the entire day.

Perry found time to have a secret chat with me, telling me not to blame myself for everything that happened. I still did, though. He also told me that it was now my job to care for Raven's litter, but that was obvious. Her last wish was for me to take care of her children, which was something I would definitely carry out.

The litter of five included three boys and two girls. Their eyes were still closed and they were still being fed milk. Every time I looked at them, I felt the need to protect them. Is this what mother's felt like whenever they see their children?

Aside from the guilt I felt over the two deaths, I felt even worse about liking Rowan. I had wanted Raven out of the picture, and now she was, but I was still so torn up about the entire thing. I was a disgusting excuse for a wolf and a person, and I slowly consumed myself with that thought.