All I've Ever Wanted (Rough Draft)

Chapter 5 (Kyle)

I was once again in the dark staring at the lines on the ceiling, it was getting all too familiar, and not in a good way. I went back to the diner, the dark-skinned guy's face seemed to light up when I asked about Charlotte, he even knew me by name.  The way he scrolled me, like he was checking me out, I was sure he liked men, but he seemed to be more protective of Charlotte's information, be he said he'd tell her I came by. 

The other guy their was pushier. I assumed he was Charlotte's boss. I remembered what was on his name tag "Eric". He looked like the kind of guy drunk with power that liked pushing around women that were under him, because they wouldn't give him the time of day.

I let out a breath, I couldn't do it anymore. I needed to get the hell out of this room. I'd taken a quick shower changed in to a simple black T-shirt and dark blue jeans with my thick black boots. There wasn't really anywhere I could go, I couldn't go to Char's because it was possible she thought I was some kind of creep, there was no reason to go to the soup kitchen I'd met her at, even the diner would just look bad for me, my only choice was Moonshines.

Mateo looked at me as his brow furrowed as soon as I walked into the semi-crowded bar, "You're aware I told you tomorrow at five right."

I was going to tell him that I just came to drink, but then I wondered how it looked getting wasted in front of my new boss, which meant that I actually wanted to take my chances and stay a while. I unzipped my jacket barging past him, "I'm sure you can find something for me to do," I said, "Free labor."

I heard him growl behind me over the chatter of the other people, "You want something to do, hot shot?" He sneered, "Follow me."

I glanced around the now lively place, for a bar out in the stick Mateo had a nice set up. There were two bartenders behind the long counter a guy with light hair wearing a thin plaid cotton shirt, and a slender woman with long almost unnatural black hair. Her pale skin and her bright read lips made her look goth. Her milky blue eyes caught mine and she smiled and shot me a wink going back to her customer. I felt me feet slip and noticed I'd tripped over a long metal slab in the floor leading into the back area around the bar.

"Watch your step," Mateo said grabbing the back of my neck after the fact.

To say that Mateo put me to work would have been an understatement. I started with dishes, breaking down boxes, and taking out trash which was no picnic especially with the pissed off looking possum guarding it, I had never seen one up close before. I ended the night cleaning the bathrooms. I was a foster kid that was used to getting grunt work where ever I went, even where I worked, but in one night I felt like I'd seen things that couldn't be unseen, and if I didn't care if I didn't see another glass, toilet, broom, or box in my life. All my muscles cursed me for not just staying home wallowing in my dark room. I knew better now.

I was the last one out the door before Mateo he was thumbing though a stack of cash and giving each employee a cut of the pile as they walked out of the door, I just blew past and ran into his firm open palm.

"Not so fast hot shot." He licked his finger and flipped through the small pile of bills.

"Keep it," I grunted.

"No," He said stuffing the bills in my jacket pocket, "I can't in good conscious not pay you for tonight. That's not how the world works son. " He pat me on the head like a child, "Have a bonfire with it, I don't care."

I was too tired to argue, it would end up going toward my son and his mother anyway, if I had any hope of getting back into her good graces. The icy cold night chilled me to the core, or that could have been the darkness off the woods setting in seeing the few cars in the parking lot pull quickly out. Everyone was as eager as I was to get home to bed.

I watched the inside light inside the bar go off and the massive silhouette of Mateo emerge from the bar in the darkness. I wondered if I even wanted to comeback tomorrow, but I remembered her his comment about coming to work when I was supposed to. I didn't want to think about my shift tomorrow. I didn't want to think about anything but my comfortable bed. Which was crazy ironic.

I couldn't get home fast enough, my first thought was shower, but I don't even think I made it. The last thing I remembered was flopping head first on the couch in the living room telling myself I would get up in a couple of minutes. Then as if minutes later the morning sun singed my eyes. I hardly felt rested but I forced myself up to take a shower, I smelled like death itself. I stripped away my clothes as I headed to my room to find at least a clean pair of boxers to sleep it. The hot water felt amazing against my skin as I washed off the night before. This was worse than any kind of sweat from a show, or an after party with groupies, the memories I wanted to erase, especially in the bathroom. I shuddered at the memories as I shifted my mind to Auggie. It was times like this I wanted a picture of my little guy, so I remembered what was important in my life.

I stepped out and let the cool air coat me, feeling as if I washed away a heavy layer of filth. After I slipped on my boxers I fell on my bed like a tree. I glanced up and noticed my thick jacket still on the floor and the stack of money hanging out my pocket. I grumbled turning my head, no amount of money could take away those raw images, but something Mateo said sunk in, about not feeling comfortable getting something for nothing, for some reason I thought about Char. Maybe that was it. I didn't feel like over thinking it, I just dozed.