Insignificant

Party Time

It's been 2 months since the incident and Matt has been helping a lot to come out of my shell. It took me awhile to tell him everything but it came out and he didn't judge me just encouraged me to do better.  He would come stay over from Thursday to Monday to keep an eye on me and to make sure I'm eating properly.Turns out he has a girlfriend and she would come over too and we’ve become quite good friends. You'll be happy to know that I'm back to a healthy size 12 and I'm happy with myself. I do have some moments when my confidence relapses and I recoil within myself but I pick myself up so its all good. I smile more often, I've started reading again and watching tv as well. I've missed soo much! I found out that the show Matt made watch was called new girl. I loved that programme, it was soo funny my favorite character was Schmidt. I even spoke to my mum more often and I think we were closer than we’d ever been. Things were picking up except my social life which brings me to coming events

At this moment I was freaking out in Matt's car because I hadn’t been to a party in soo long as I wasn't really invited to any. Matt asked me to come and after everything he'd done for me I couldn’t say no but I was freaking out. I hadn't been in a place with a lot of people except the supermarket but there was a lot of space to move about in. But a houseparty from what I recall, there wasn't much space and everyone was in each others face too. I never knew how to deal with hence why I became anti-social. Also there was going to be alcohol, I hadn't had a drink in forever this equals lightweight and I don't wanna embarrass myself in front of people I didn't know!

I was brought out of my thoughts when Matt stopped the car at what I presumed was the house because you could hear music and there were some people outside. Matt noticing panicking held hand and told me it would be okay and I should follow his lead. When we got in he firstly got me a vodka and lemonade and he went to introduce me to his friends. All of them seemed happy to see me most probably he'd spoken to them about me. This made me feel a tad self conscious but I just went where the alcohol took me and realized I was loosening up.

At some point in the night Matt had left me with his friends, who should I say are hilarious, to bang his girlfriend. When he came back he had to go out to give directions to another friend who was coming too. I was at the drinks table when I saw him with a friend and when I looked up him, he was pointing at me to his friend. When his friend looked at me my jaw dropped. I couldn't believe who was smiling and waving at me. I hadn't seen him in soo long. What was he doing here at this party? Realising I mouth was still open I closed it and raised my class to him and turned my back to him. My next thought was that I would be avoiding that piece of meat if I could help it.