Insignificant

Seeing Mum

Seeing Mum

I decided it was time to visit my ma because she deserved that much from me. All the memories from the years before were coming back to and I was pleased to say that the piercing pain I would feel when I thought about coming back had dulled ever so slightly. This gave me the courage to walk through the gates and ring the doorbell. When mum answered the door a lot had changed about her and it was good changes. She looked healthier, she’d dyed her hair a nice chestnut colour that suited her really well and she had a medium cut hair. I was happy to see progression in her appearance, this was good. No doubt she was glad to see me, she was squeezing me so hard I thought my head would pop off but I accepted it because I did miss her too. After letting me in she went straight to the kitchen to switch the kettle on as usual as I made my way to the lounge area.

“I like the new interior mum when did you change it up?” I complimented and questioned.

“ A year after you left, I thought it would be a nice change and take my mind of my baby flying the nest.” She says before walking out to meet me in the hallway. “But anyway I can’t wait for you to tell me everything you’ve been up to. You look so grown.” She says as she pushes me towards lounge and out of nowhere she screams “Surprise!”  

My smile was wiped of my face when I saw, in my mum’s maroon leather chair sat Kevin. Fear like I’d never felt before got a hold of me and I completely froze and the chilling smile he meet me with only showed me the amount of trouble I was in after this. There was no way in hell that I would make it to Matt’s tonight. Throughout my time with my mum I had gone from being free to being uptight and bless my mum she didn’t understand why but she just carried on because she was enjoying my presence. I had to excuse myself because I felt like I was going to blow up. I was so much in my thoughts and anxiety that I hadn’t realised that Kevin had followed me. He pulled me back and slammed in the wall to which I whimpered.

“Where have you been?” He asked with clear anger.

“I went over to Matt’s.” I stuttered out and his hands were at my throat within seconds.

“Who gave you the permission to go there? Do not test my patience sweetheart because I won’t have trouble destroying you.” He let go of my neck and cupped my face. “You make so angry but I love you and you have to understand that I can’t and I won’t lose you.” He went on to kiss me and it was vile! This made me think that before, I had become acquired to his taste hence why I didn’t complain but now oh lord what was I going to do? He kissed my forehead and went back to the lounge and my world began to crumble again. We stayed for dinner as I told my mom about Greece and how my relationship was going with Kevin. Of course for most part I was lying as I had impressing to do so there was no choice in this matter.

On the way back to Kevin’s I called Matt to let him know that I won’t be coming for a while and to thank him for having me, Oscar wanted to talk to me talk to me but I refused. When we got in, I went straight to Kevin’s bedroom, stripped and got ready for what was coming. I actually cried because of how rough he was being but it was my punishment for leaving him with nothing for the few days. Afterwards I cried because I was back to being in the wrong bed with the wrong person. How sad.

The next day it was so hard for me to get out of bed. When I opened my eyes they felt puffy and they were hurting me. I sat up to find Kevin looking at me.

“I’ve never seen you cry that ever.”

“You should have been there when you cheated. It just wouldn’t stop but that was probably because I thought I was going to die.” I say bluntly and  get out off bed. I took the longest time in the shower just thinking about how I was going to get out of this. There had to be a way, I couldn’t stay without sinking lower or bring my death earlier than it’s meant to be. I come out of the bathroom to find Kevin sitting in the same position except he had food in front of him and as I got dressed I could feel his eyes on me. I was about to walk out of the room when he spoke,

“Tell me everything.”

“Pardon?”

“Tell me how you felt when everything happened. I want to know.” He says as he comes behind me and wraps his hand around my waist.

“Why? You didn’t care then so why now?” I ask and he turns me around.

“Well I plan to make something of us so I think it’s my duty to know.” He say as he leads me to the bed.

“I watched you with those girls, they made you call out their names, something I’d never done before and all I kept thinking was why I wasn’t doing it. Then you accused me of cheating and you dumped me like I was nothing obviously my heart broke into a million pieces and it felt like someone just kept trampling over it all the time. Your brother helped me for a while and I will forever be grateful to him. After that I run away from everything including myself and here we are now. Happy?” He didn’t respond and I walked out of the room to do what I wanted which was basically nothing. The whole day Kevin didn’t speak to me and when it was time for bed Kevin was on me but the only difference was tonight he wanted everything to be about me. He walked out of the bathroom with a Thor outfit on, dimmed the lights and started playing music. As much as I hate to say this, it cheered me up and when he decided to hold me tight to himself I settled down and embraced the warmth radiating off him.

It’s been a month since that night and for the first time ever with Kevin, I have waken up daily with a smile on my face and it makes me even more pleased when he does little things like bringing me breakfast in bed or just constantly telling how amazing I am. Now you might think I’ve gone soft on him but he was being genuine and I could tell by the way his eye light up when they see me. After my breakfast in bed and a sensual shower, I make my way down to do my duties as the lady of the house. The doorbell rings and Archie answers it and my heart nearly stops. There was Oscar dropping something off to the house for Kevin and taking instructions from Kevin. Without realising I utter a bit judgemental,

“You’re working for him now?”

“Yes ma’am.” He responds quietly

“What has he got over you?” I ask not willing to let it go.

“He came on his own accord so don’t push blame on me.” Kevin announced slight annoyance in his voice.

“Is that true?” I asked shocked.

“Yes ma’am.” Oscar answered plainly without even looking me in the eye and with that I realise he’s on their side. The one person who I thought was incorruptible and immovable was working for his brother, who almost killed him because he has possession issues. As usual I felt dejected and run up to our room only to have Kevin come in with some sort of fury.

“You are not doing this again! You are going to get the hell over him because I am not giving you my heart or kindness for it to be thrown in my face.” He yells and this only gets me angry.

“You should have told me you’d made this deal and I’m only acting like this because I’m shocked.”

“It is none of your business what I do with my belongings, so I will hire and fire whoever the hell I want.”

“Yes Kevin.” I replied defeated and walked up to him and kissed him. When we came out for air he leaned his head on mine and held onto my hand which was cupping his face and whispered,

“I love you so much and it hurts to see you fawning over someone other than me. I was your first love and I want it to stay that way.” He let go of me and walked out of the room without a second glance.