Life After Losing You

Chapter 1: Lifeless

Author's Note

Welcome! Thank you so much for checking out my first (non-supernatural ) romance novel, Life After Losing You! I hope you enjoy this first chapter and begin to get a better sense of what this story will be about. Before you begin reading (if you're new to my work), know that I will always provide a Soundtrack Song (what music inspired this chapter) and also a picture in the Side Bar -> Photo

Happy Reading!

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EDITED: 7/11/15 ✓

Chapter 1: Lifeless

I folded my fingertips together carefully as I stared out at the warm-toned colours of fall. The trees lining the forest were beautiful, capturing my attention with each falling leaf. One, two, three... I counted my breaths in tune with the falling leaves to keep myself from hyperventilating. Somehow I'd managed to keep my tears at bay throughout the in-home visitations but now, standing before Cal's final resting place, I couldn't seem to control the waterworks fuelled by my unmanageable grief.

In the moment that I watched the shiny, cherry-wood casket descend towards it's awaiting hole, I snapped. In a wild haze of frustration, denial, and disbelief, I flung forward, almost toppling into the gaping hole. Hands latched onto my arms, holding my weak body back and away from the disappearing casket.

"Cal, p-please," I sobbed brokenly, beginning to quiver from head-to-toe. "P-please you can't leave me," I babbled hysterically. "CAL!" I shrieked once. I began to scream and thrash irrationally in the hands holding me. I could not grip the crippling hurt surging through me. I was suffocating in my own despair.

"Plea-a-ase." I collapsed onto my knees and slumped forward, covering my mouth to muffle the sobs escaping through my lips. As the earth dampened my stocking-covered knees, I continued to watch the casket slowly fade away into the earth.

Then, just like witnessing a towering building come crashing down or raindrop fall and splash against the unforgiving pavement, I hit rock bottom and I knew there was no way I'd ever be able to stand back up again.

* * *

Approximately 1.5 Years Later

My in-home tutor dropped her pencil and sighed, clearly exasperated.

"Dear, are you going to even bother trying today?" She asked carefully, talking to me as if I were a small child rather than a teenager.

I hesitated for a moment, feeling loosely sympathetic for the woman sitting across from me. The older woman had the patience of a saint, visiting me each day and attempting to help me along through my schoolwork. I did the work as a way to pass the time and distract my mind from the ghastly memories.

Though, today, functioning robotically would not be a plausible option.

I shook my head slowly and gazed out emotionlessly at the rain washed window.

"Maybe tomorrow will be better," the tutor placed her warm, aged hand onto mine and smiled tightly before packing up her things. "I'll see you at noon, Sophia, okay?" She whispered again, seemingly uncertain that I had processed her short remarks.

I did not look up as she scurried through the mansion, exiting quietly through the front door. As soon as I heard her familiar car engine purr off into the distance, I stood up hazily and walked toward the living room. I was feeling completely drained, so I decided to simply curl up in a tight ball on one of the hard, leather couches. I could not imagine anyone ever wearing these couches in, or much-less lounging on them. Rock-hard.