All Over Again || Rucas

What I feel about Riley

Lucas's POV

She has me in chains. Riley can have running after her in a cold empty street, wondering why she would keep a secret from me and with one come back she can make me feel too many things.

Only a million times a day!

What's that supposed to mean? Did she regret it? If she did, why?

Maybe she didn't want me to know how Maya feels because she wanted to give her the space to tell me.

Or she didn't want me to know Maya's real feelings because since then she and Maya were never the same.

There's also a chance she didn't want me to know because I chose her and she left and-

I walk with Zay to the school. It's Thursday. Riley and I haven't talked to each other since that Saturday night and she seemed to have totally forgot about it. So why can't I?

When I get in, my eyes automatically find Riley. She's standing by her locker with Charlie Gardner. She wearing blue jeans and a grey top. Black and grey seem to be her favorite colors now.

Zay waves at her and she smiles at him. He turns to me.

"I'm going now. But I'll join you and Maya at lunch."

He walks to Riley and I feel my heart getting eavy. I'm jealous. Not because I think that Zay will do anything with Riley. I'm just jealous of the way that he can easily walk up to her and talk about every day stuff; something that I have lost the ability to do, since every time we talk, she ends up yelling or crying or starring into my eyes too long for my heart to stay calm.

She tells him something and he smiles. Then he does a 'high five' with Charlie. That guy is seriously taking my place in everyone's life.

I walk to my locker, where I find Farkle.

"Morning", he says.

"Morning", I reply.

"You know, I was thinking of throwing a party.", he says.

I shiver.

"I'm so not coming", I tell him.

"What?!", he asks.

"I mean, ", I try to explain, "that I don't think coming would be a good idea. Charlie threw a party too and it didn't come out so good for me."

He frowns.

"What are you talking about? You and Maya got back together in that party.", he says.

Aw shoot. I hadn't thought about Maya when I said it. I was thinking about Riley. What is wrong with me?

"Yeah that was the good part, I guess". Great. Now I fixed it.

I hate how the four of us (Farkle, Zay, Maya and I) used to be one of the tightest groups ever but when Riley came back, we kinda 'broke up'.

"I just think that since Riley came back", I say, "you, Zay, Maya and I have got a little lost, you know."

Farkle smiles sadly.

"What did you expect Lucas? This is Riley and Maya we're talking about. Riley left and Maya was hurt. She will never forget it.", he says.

"That's not what I meant...", I murmur.

He frowns again.

"So what did you...", he starts but never finishes the sentence.

I take a deep breath.

"You didn't mean that Maya should have forgiven Riley. What you were saying is that Riley shouldn't have returned."

Okay, that's not what I said. He made it sound like I hated Riley or something.

"Farkle, that's not what I said. I just said that we let her break our group."

Farkle shakes his head.

"Lucas. She's Riley. She is part of the group.", he says.

"I mean the other group--"

"THERE IS NO OTHER GROUP", his voice get louder. He calms down by taking a deep breath. "I don't know what you expected, Lucas. But this is Riley we're talking about. You thought that I would sit down with you guys and listen to her story and decide if we should forgive her or not?"

Pretty much, yeah.

"Pretty much, yeah."

"There was nothing to decide. I had forgiven her already. I don't know her whole story. I don't know everything that happened these three years. I don't know why she's wearing grey and black so much. And I don't need to know. She's Riley. I'll always forgive her because I'll always love her."

I look down.

I wish I was so sure of what I felt about Riley. What is this feeling I get when he says he loves her? Is it jealously?

"Hey guys"

Zay?

He is coming towards us with Riley behind him. She looks awkward and stiff but she's coming.

"Hey", we murmur.

They reach us and Riley stands between Farkle and Zay. I must have been staring because she blushes and turns away.

I look at Farkle.

"So, a party?", I ask.

He nods. Zay frowns.

"What party?", he asks.

"I was thinking of throwing a party.", Farkle says.

"Yeah!", Zay cheers.

"I'm so not coming", Riley says, smiling.

Farkle and I look at each other, then turn to her.

"Why not?", he asks, all innocent

Riley looks at me quickly then at Farkle.

"I don't think it would be a good idea.", she explains, looking awkward.

I don't know what the hell I was saying to Farkle before. She's adorable.

Yes, I am crazy. But I can explain.

See, when she's not close to me my mind is clear. But when she is the only thng I can think of is how cute she is when she smiles, how her eyes shine.

"Why not Riley?", I ask, acting all innocent.

She looks annoyed.

"Are you going?", she asks, instead of answering.

"I never miss a party", I say and with the corner of my eye I see Farkle frowning.

"Well, then I'm certainly not going.", she snaps and I flinch.

YEAH, she still remembers Gardner's party.

"You are going to be missed, ma'am", I say and turn my back to my friends.

"Now, excuse me but I'm going to find Maya.", I tell them.

"Behind ya' huckleberry", I hear a voice.

I smile at myself as I hear my friends laugh.

I turn to face them again. Maya is standing between Riley and Zay, smiling with the one corner of her mouth.

"Hello, there.", I say.

She walks to me and places a kiss on my lips. I open my eyes again and I see that Riley has gently looked away.

When Maya is back between her and Zay, Riley risks a glance at me.

I smile at her. She smiles back, shyly.

The bell rings and we all head to our classes, destroyng our little gorup. A group that hasn't been the same since that pretty brunette left.

I know it's a bit messy chapter and it's kinda weird but... anyway, vote whatever you like. It really means a lot.