A Night Out

Guys Night

"He coming?" Jay asked Kevin as he finished up the last of the paperwork for the night Erin having taken off already, "I'm pretty sure Erin is going out with Burgess tonight"

Kevin shrugged, "I don't know, he's not doing to well" he was seriously torn, between wanting to kick Adam's ass and just wanting to hug him. He'd never seen the guy so out of it before, he was a mess.

"What's his deal? Do you know?" Jay asked, they'd all been surprised by the development he knew Erin knew more than she was letting on but out of respect for Kim she hadn't told him anything.

He did know Erin was pissed at Adam, she made that blatantly clear. He was certain if looks could kill Adam would have been dead weeks ago, Voight had even called her in for a 'closed door' meeting to get her to back off of Ruzek.

"I don't, just know Kim was tired of waiting, and I can't blame her. He wasn't making an effort at all" Kevin explained, the only thing Adam was even remotely concerned about was the bachelor party and he'd even let that drop.

"Yea, well now we're all suffering with his miserable ass" Jay finished off the last of his paperwork, "ready?"

"Yea!"

Adam sat hunched over in the locker room, his shirt in his hands. He couldn't bring himself to get changed he dreaded going home at night. He hated being alone, he hated being with out her.

She was his oxygen and without her he was suffocating, he knew he fucked up. He couldn't explain why he was so hesitant, the only thing he knew without a shadow of a doubt was that he loved her.

It floored him when she called it off and placed the ring in the palm of his hand, he was blindsided.

He couldn't understand it, he let her down.

The one person he never wanted to let down, the one person who he wanted to be proud of him.

The one person he never wanted to hurt, he didn't want to be the reason for her tears.

He was numb, No. That wasn't entirely true. He could feel, it was this overwhelming soul crushing pain, he physically hurt.

He missed her.

The door to the locker room opened, "Ruzek, we're headed out for a few drinks you should come with" Kevin sat beside him on the bench, "Man, you look like shit"

Adam lifted his gaze from the floor and met Kevin's eyes, "Feel like it too" he groaned, "did she say anything to you?"

"When?" Kevin asked, she hadn't said much to him at all, he was sure it was because he had become so close with Adam.

"Whenever? I don't know.." He straddled the bench and leaned back against the wall, "just seems like it came out of nowhere"

Kevin changed his shirt, "Ruzek, you dragged your feet man, maybe that's why" he really didn't know what Kim's mindset was, "you should talk to her"

Adam laughed, "She doesn't want anything to do with me, ignores my texts. Hasn't called me in almost a month" the only time he'd spoken to her was when she called asking him when it would be a good time for her to drop off his things from her place and pick up what she had left at his place.

He shuddered at the memory, when she arrived to pick up her things she wouldn't look him in the eye. She barely spoke, she had come with her sister, who he swore was going to throw up at the sight of him. He wanted to beg her to reconsider, wanted to tell her how much he loved her but he was scared.

Scared, shitless. He didn't know if he could handle her rejecting him again, it would be akin to pouring salt in an open wound.

He let her walk out without uttering a more than a very awkward 'Hey'.

Kevin stood, "So, you coming?"

Adam signed, "Yea" he didn't want to go, but he really didn't want to go home to his empty apartment, everywhere he looked brought back a different memory of Kim. He was definitely picking the lesser of two evils by going to the bar.

He wanted to drink them all away, it was the cowards way for sure.

He was beginning to think that's exactly what he was.

A coward.

Jay paid the driver and exited the cab, "Alright fellas where should we start?" He asked as he surveyed the long block, bars lining each side.

Kevin spoke first, "Let's go to Lefties, they've got the fight on" he had a some money riding on that fight and wanted to catch it.

"Works for me" Jay responded.

They both waited for Adam's response, not surprised when he remained quiet, "Yo, Ruzek?"

He looked up, "you call me?" He asked, it was clear he'd rather be somewhere else, "Sorry..."

Kevin draped his arm over his shoulder, "It's alright, let's get you drunk" he laughed.

They'd worked their way down the block, Adam hadn't said much at all.

Even ignored the pair of girls who had tried to talk to him, Jay couldn't take it any more, Ruzek was seriously killing the mood.

He grabbed a round of beers and took them back to the table, "Ruzek, you need to cheer the fuck up" Jay laughed, "it sucks but man you need to get over it, go pick up some chick and get laid" he downed some of the beer.

Adam rolled his eyes, "I'm good"

"No, you aren't. You need to get laid, man. It's written all over your face" he laughed, "if you won't do that at least take care of it yourself"

Adam ignored his last statement, "I'm gonna go" he told them, he had made a mistake by joining them.

Kevin nudged Jay, "Tell him"

"Tell me what?" Adam stopped in his tracks, "what is it?"

Jay elbowed Kevin, "you've got a big fucking mouth, you know that?"

"I do, and big fists too. So watch it" he laughed.

Jay held his hands up as if he was surrendering, "We're good Kev, I swear" he joked, "Erin is over at Molly's with Kim.."

Adam nodded, "Okay, I'm still leaving" he knew she didn't want to see him, the ring dangling from his neck had proven that, "see you guys Monday"

Kevin grabbed his arm, "Don't leave, come to Molly's with us. Don't let me become a third wheel with Halstead and Lindsay. C'mon man, do it for me"

Adam relented, he needed to see her, even if she didn't speak to him he needed to see her, needed to see that she was okay.

"Fine.."

---Note---

Last chapter will be done tonight.