Love Scars

Ch. 11: Brianna

It was cold in the white bleached hospital and the sound of nurses rushing around filled the empty hallways.

I just wished I could go home, it was uncomfortable in this starchy gown. My wrists were wrapped up and so were my thighs, causing me to be even more uncomfortable. I couldn't move either, I had restraints.

"All the anorexic patients get restraints." The nurse would say whenever I begged her to let me out.

I'd be stuck here for a long time, and I can't do anything. The only way for me to be let out is to either eat or get my parents to sign me out, and neither of those is gonna happen.

Jared often came, and I'd wake up to see him hunched over in the plastic chair, on his phone. He was so worried about me, I wish I hadn't done anything. He had to tell Daniel that there were no visitors so I could sleep.

"Ms. Brianna?" The nurse knocked on my door before walking in. "I brought you your lunch."

"You know I'm not going to eat, might as well feed it to someone else." I looked out the window. When she didn't say anything I looked back at her. "Please don't make me eat."

Her name was Maria, she was a short, Latina woman with wavy brown hair. She was beautiful. Maria set the tray on the table and sat by the foot of my bed. "How about we make a deal."

"Like what?"

"If you eat your mashed potatoes, I'll let you out of the restraints for the day. We can do that every day, but only if you continue to eat."

I thought about it for a moment before I sighed. "Maria-"

"Honey, you have to eat. There isn't another way for you to get better." She put her hand on mine and held it. "I don't know what it's like for you at home, but we care about you here. I care about you." Her dark brown eyes were tearing up.

I smiled at her and she smiled back. She was really good at her job.

"I'll eat a little." I wasn't sure if I could keep it down, but I could at least eat a little bit. She handed me the tray and I grabbed the apple to slowly munch on. Maria untied me and left, content.

I threw the partially eaten apple at the trash can and sat up, rubbing my wrists. I missed the feeling, but I knew there was no way for me to do that here. I wouldn't be able to do it for a long time, there were probably people going through my room right now, trying to find anything sharp... Or not, considering my parents aren't the best.

The clock read 1:54, Jared should be here soon. I really wished that Daniel would come visit, but I know he has to watch Jasmine since their parents are always out late. Now that I was out of my restraints, I could actually reach my phone.

I leaned over, cracking my back, and grabbed the metal rectangle. I had a lot of notifications.

Instagram, tumblr, texts, YouTube... I had missed a lot these past couple days. Daniel had called a few times, and Jared texted. I had been tagged in a lot of photos too...

I unlocked my phone and went to the app, to see what people were saying about me. They're probably saying how they wish I succeeded... I thought. Although, when I actually saw my feed, they were all photos about how they pray I get better and how they wish they knew me better. Even people I've never talked to took photos from my page to make a Flipagram. I had DM's and I was just shocked.

It's not like I'm always on Instagram, or online in general. I'm often just watching YouTube, yet all these people seem to care. Maybe it's a good thing I didn't do it... Even though I didn't know half of the people that posted about me, they still cared. That's amazing, considering we're in high school.

My surprise was replaced my discontent when I saw Alex's post. It was a picture of me with Daniel in English class, and the caption just made me feel sick.

You see this girl? This is Brianna. She's the hottest girl in this school and I hope she's ok. She's to pretty too feel sad, so someone made her do it. Whoever it was, I will shoot there head off. Bree, if your reading this, your everything to me. I am praying that your ok. Its ok if your sad, just tell me next time. I can help you more than you think. Their's always gonna be people in the world that are mean and want you to be hurt, but your stronger then them.

The most disgusting thing about it wasn't the grammar mistakes, but the fact that he thinks that I'll believe that bullshit. Okay, too, to, their, you're, you're, you're, okay, it's, okay, you're, there's, you're... I silently corrected the whole thing.

That was probably the most painful thing I'd ever read. At least I got a good laugh when I read Daniel's comment.

If you actually cared about her, you would call her. And you wouldn't call her "hot", because she's far more than something for you to play with. And next time, ask your baby sister for help with your grammar. She's probably better at it than you.

The internet is a crazy place, but I'm glad I have friends like Daniel to stand up for me. Even if it's just through a comment. I forgot to call him back...

I quickly close out of my other apps and dialed his number. He would be really worried about me.

"Hello?"

"Hey..."

He sighed in relief. "Thank God it's you. I was scared that it was a nurse or something calling me to tell me that you didn't make it or-"

"Daniel, calm down," I laughed. "Why would the nurse call off of my phone?"

"I-I dunno. Are you okay? They wouldn't let me see you."

"Yeah, I'm doing alright."

It was good to finally talk to someone again. I explained that he couldn't see me because I wasn't eating and that I was sleeping most of the time, leaving out that Jared made that up.

"That makes sense I suppose. Plus it's family only, right?"

"It was yeah. Today the doctor told me that you could come visit-" I couldn't even finish my sentence.

"I'll be there in 10 minutes-" He pulled away from the phone. "Bye mom! Okay yeah I'll be there in 10-15 minutes with Jared-" I then heard him fall over his shoes and get into the car and start it.

"Don't die, okay?"

"That's not funny Brianna," I could hear he was trying to hold back laughter. We always joked like that, and he was already smiling because he knew I was okay.

"Then don't do it," I smiled.

He muttered under his breath, "Screw you," then hung up.