I Like Bad Boys (Phan)

Chapter 12 - The "L-Word"

Dan's POV

My parent's left the house, and I rung Phil. I wanted to be with him. It was a weekend, and we had all the time in the world.

"Hello?" his sweet voice said over the phone.

"It's me. Are you coming?"

"Of course. Now?"

"Yeah."

He arrived in only ten minutes time. He gave me a kiss at the door. I brought him up to my room, where he had never been before. His eyes stared in wonder at the pale, nearly pink walls, and flowery things everywhere.

"Is my room too girly for you?" I asked playfully.

"No," he said. "It's cute. It suits you."

I sat on my bed, and he did the same. I couldn't help staring silently at him. He was more than an attractive face and body. He was a punk, but he had heart. I looked into his blue puppy eyes and no longer had to wonder if I was doing the right thing with him.

"I'm sorry," he said, breaking the silence, "that I have to hide us from them. If I could, I would want to share you with the world. But I can't."

I took his soft hand in mine. "It's okay, Phil, I understand."

"I just wanted to protect you."

"Me?"

"Yeah. I mean, mostly I didn't want word getting out that I was dating a boy, but also, I knew that some of the other punks would target you. They wouldn't try to hurt me, because I could probably snap them like twigs if I wanted, but I don't. They would probably go after you instead."

Me? He was protecting me? After all this time, he was worried they would hurt me?

"Phil," I said, both in shock and pride, "you really did that for me? Partially, all this hiding was for me?"

"Yeah."

I tilted his chin towards myself and kissed him. "I'm not scared of them," I said when I pulled back, leaving our noses touching and staying close to him. His forehead was just barely on mine. He was staring in my eyes. I was staring in his.

"Your eyes are... beautiful," he choked out.

"Yours are even more so."

"Dan..." The words he wanted faded.

"I'm happy you came and asked me out," I had to say. "I really want you to know that you mean a lot to me."

He found my hand and locked fingers with me with a slightly embarrassed smile, looking down. I used my other hand to tilt his head up back at me.

"I asked you to come here because I had something important to tell you."

His eyes didn't loose contact with mine, but blinked nervously. He gave a nervous smile and chuckle. "My heart's beating hard," he said, both to ignore and attempt to expel the nerves.

"I love you, Phil Lester."

Phil's POV

My eyes peeled open quickly. I had heard as many false "I love yous" as one ever can, but Dan was in love with me.

"Dan," I said, my voice cracking. "I've heard 'I love you' before. I don't know if the ones I heard were true or not, but I can say this. I've never said it and meant it before."

His eyes darted to the corner. "I see."

Now it was my turn to tilt his chin to face me. "But I mean it now."

His face lit up.

"I love you, Dan Howell."

He was blushing bright red, but smiling wildly through it. He ducked his head and nuzzled my shoulder until my arm hugged around him. He giggled. "You said the L-word."

"Well yeah," I said. "And I'll say it again. I love you, Dan."

"I love you, Phil."

Dan kissed me and slowly pushed to lower me onto his bed. It was much softer and warmer than mine. His body was half resting on me, and I was supporting him with my hands on his lower back. Dan's hands ran into my hair, mixing it up and almost pulling it. He dropped his head and very gently kissed my neck, then sweetly and playfully nipped at the skin. Soon, his gentle fingers snuck beneath the bottom of my shirt, and his hand ran up my stomach onto my chest, lightly caressing one nipple with his fingers. A shiver of surprise and pleasure electrocuted my body.

"Dan," I said, with almost a tiny moan, "I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do."

His fingers were still just brushing over the sensitive skin on my chest. "But Phil," he said slowly, dramatically. "I do. I do want to. I want to so badly. The question is if you want to."

I had never had sex with another boy, but I can say that I at least knew how it worked. When I was first feeling bisexual tendencies, I had... "experimented" with videos on the internet, just to see if I liked it. Sure enough, the sight of a man being pleasured by another man was highly arousing enough. But then again, with no first hand experience, I worried that I wouldn't do well for Dan.

"I do," I told him. "It's just... I've never done this with a guy before."

"Well, I could assume that."

"Are you a virgin, Dan?"

"No."

So he's been with someone.

"Have you ever watched porn?" he asked.

I admitted I had.

"Gay porn?"

I also admitted to that.

"Well, only if you're ready, I'd love to teach you first hand," he said, an attractive slyness in his words.

"I am," I said. "I want you, if you want me, Dan."

He did. "Are you really sure?"

"Yes."

~~~~~~~~~~

A/N:

Hey guys! Judging from context I bet you're expecting a smut chapter next, right? Well, I'm not 100% okay with writing smut as it makes me mildly uncomfortable, but I did it anyway. However, I'm going to private it, only because I want to include it but also not. So it's there, but private, so only followers can see. Sorry.

No worries, though; you aren't missing anything. The next chapter's just a smut scene. The story picks up after.

Thank you for understanding. 

~SLP