Fixing The Scatter [boyxboy]

Fixing The Scatter {18}

Staz was hesitant and uncomfortable, but determined. He reached out, fingers brushing against the fabric of my shirt.

I kissed him back, careful to let him set the intensity of the kiss. His bottom lip was slightly chapped, as if he bit it a lot.

His grip on my hand tightened as we kissed, shaking with nerves and discomfort. But he didn't stop kissing me.

Staz was a clumsy kisser, but it wasn't awkward. The feel of our lips pressed together numbed my mind, easing me my muscles into relaxation.

These were just more feelings Staz didn't know how to verbalize. This was just another way to convey what he was feeling. He wasn't as talented at this as he was at drawing, but he was trying.

We slowly pulled apart from each other, my lips lightly tingling from the contact. Staz looked down at our hands, still holding each other.

"I'm glad you were my first kiss," he said. "Who was your first kiss?"

"Technically my first kiss was the daughter of one of my mother's friends. But I was only three," I said.

He looked at me with that intense stare he got whenever he made eye contact. "I want to date you."

I ran a hand through my hair. What the hell was happening? Was I really falling for Staz Montgomery?

I looked down at my bed and my eyes widened. What had I done?

Here I was, sitting on my bed kissing Staz Montgomery. The same bed that, not that long ago, I held Gideon under the sheets of. I had kissed Staz and in that moment, forgotten Gideon. Forgotten the boy I'd fallen in love with.

I released his hand and got off of my bed. "I think it's time for you to go, Staz."

He checked the time and frowned. "But it's not dinnertime yet."

"I want you to leave," I said flatly.

"Why?" he asked, frown getting deeper.

"I just do. Get out of my house!" I said.

He stood up, tugging on his sleeve nervously. "I don't want to leave yet."

"Get. Out." I gave him a look that let him know that this was not a damn debate.

Staz dropped his head and walked out of my room with me. I led him downstairs and through the kitchen towards the door.

"Leaving so soon, Staz?" dad asked curiously.

"Yes," Staz said, looking at me in confusion.

"Well, it was very nice to see you," dad said, smiling.

Staz left and I shut the door, clenching my fists, hating myself. How could I do that? How could I be so hurt at the idea of Gideon kissing someone other than me, and then go off and do the same thing?

"Your mom came home, but she'll be working in her office, so it's just you and me for dinner." Dad stood up and glanced at me. Concern hit his face. "Jude, what's wrong? Did something happen?"

"Nothing happened!" I snapped, trying to push past him.

He caught my arm. "Jude, wait, please talk to me! I hate when you don't talk to me!"