high school ー the cube au

thirteen

privatefearless

I failed.  I sighed sitting at my new homeroom desk, staring blankly at my new schedule that had '11th' grade stamped on it. I looked around and saw some familiar faces. I still had Senior classes, but there's no way I can make up the credits from last year. Why me honestly. I might just drop out, but then again, what good will it do for me? I sigh and set my new schedule on the old desk and rub my eyes. Its almost 9 a.m and the bell is about to ring, and the first class I have is World History, and yes, I failed it my sophomore year. 

It's already 2 weeks in, and I'm still shocked about having failed last year. I thought I was doing so good? The bell rang and I went to my first period. This class feels so long. I see small sophomores around me, and a couple juniors. I'm the only 'senior' in this class. 

First, second, third, and fourth period fly by. I'm lucky I'm good at math, because algebra 2 was the only class I passed last year besides computer science. Geometry and algebra were so easy, and calculus seems easy so far. I have lunch during our 6th class, which is the only time I get to see Sean. Ant is in my personal fitness class, but I don't have the capacity to run as much as we do in that class like he does. I finish my calculus homework in class with 4 minutes to spare. 

I text Sean to meet me at the lunch patio area. The bell rings and I fling my bag over my shoulder. The other strap is broken, from last year. I haven't bought a new backpack since my sophomore year. I make my way to the patio area and meet Sean at our usual corner lunch table. 

"Hey Mr. Fearless!" Sean greets. "Ay Grape!" I joke, and he rolls his eyes. "Still not over the grape nickname I see?" He says. I nod slyly and i toss my bag to the concrete. I love this spot because there's a bush full of flowers, and sometimes a little butterfly friend comes around. Sometimes a bee friend too. I watch as Sean pulls out his organised binder, folders, and lunchbox. "I hate calculus." He says, and he puts a pretzel up to his mouth, "not because it's hard, but because it's such a tedious thing to do." And he puts the pretzel into his mouth and opens his binder.

I grab my lunchbox and put it on the wooden table. "That's so true," and I unzip the plaid black lunchbox. "I have the homework if you want it," I recommend as I grab my bag of cheerios. We sit in silence and all I can hear is the cars from the main road faintly, and a couple of other kids laughing and talking quietly. I finish my cheerios, and I can now hear Sean's pencil scratching against the workbook paper. "I hate that Ant has 4th period lunch." I say. Sean lays his pencil in the crease of the open workbook. "True, I miss that lil insect. At least he has lunch with Aryn." I sighed.

"Can I tell you something that's been eating at me?" I haven't ever really opened to Sean before but I really need to tell him this. He nodded kind of concerning. "Yeah of course bro." He said, which gave me a sense of relief. "I feel like Ant is spending more time with that girl than us, and he's part of our trio and now he's hanging out with Aryn a lot more than he has been with us. I only see him in 7th period now a days, and I haven't gone out with him in a couple of weeks." I looked down and fiddled with my ham and mayonnaise sandwich.  

"Yeah I feel, but that's his girl. I'm sure you'll understand when you find someone." I took that statement both rude and kind. I nodded though. Does he mean that I'm being selfish? Or that I've never had a serious relationship? Or that he's telling me that Ant will come around and I'll find my own girl? I finish my lunch and finish my homework for chemistry. Sean's the only one who knows I failed most of my classes. I pack my trash into my lunchbox and put my shit into my bag. I fist-bumped Grape like a giant nerd when the bell rang. 

I started slowing down, knowing that my face gets red when I run, and thinking about running for 15 minutes straight and not being able to slow down without getting a 0 already makes me feel tired. I know I have to pass this class, but I physically can't and don't want to do it. I went into the gym lobby, and considered it, but turned into the bathroom. I sat in the handicapped bathroom and sat on the floor and rested my head on my jacket against the wall so it wasn't uncomfortable. I grabbed the book I had gotten from the library a couple weeks ago but didn't have any time to start. Chapter 1. I read.

I checked my phone, and it was almost 3:30, so I packed all of my stuff into my bag and started making my way across the school to the student parking lot. I texted Grape asking for a ride. I got a text back instantly, and I knew he was gonna say yes, but I texted him anyway. I made it into the parking lot as the bell rang and I found Sean's car and leaned up against it and waited for him. I looked around as I saw hundreds of high schoolers  swarm around me and the cars suddenly looked like they were drowning in a sea of kids.

I heard the car I was on unlock and I looked up from my phone and saw Grapey. "Hey bro!" He said. I waved and looped around to the passenger seat. I got in and Sean threw his bag in the back, as did I, and he started his car. "Hey wanna stop by someone's house for a couple hours?" I looked at him. "Who's?" I asked. He adjusted his mirrors and then backed out of the parking spot. "His name is Mitchell." I had nothing else to do so I agreed. 

It took us about 15 minutes to get there, and we got out and Sean knocked on the door. What a cute suburban house. I heard the door handle being messed with and it distracted me from my thoughts. The door opened and I saw a short, chubby, curly haired boy at the door. He had his hair in a bun and he was wearing a black YouTube shirt. "Hey Sean! Hi Isaac." He said, and he invited us in. 

We went to the basement where his room was, and I sat on his futon. Mitchell sat on his bed and grabbed something from his blanket. Right as he put it up to his mouth, I knew exactly what it was. It was a vape. I tried so hard not to laugh and I played it off as a cough. He offered it to Sean, and I was fucking surprised when he took it. He coughed so hard though. I declined the offer, even though I could show off my sick o's. 

We all stepped out a couple times to smoke cigarettes, and at around 5:45 we left. Sean dropped me off at home and I went to my room and threw my shit to the ground. I went straight to my computer and opened CS:GO. As it loaded, I got a text from Sean asking if I wanted to go to a party later. I texted back, and clicked 'find competitive game.' It loaded, and I looked at the list of the people I'll be talking to for the next 45 minutes.

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O HEY!!!!

I FINALLY UPDATED RDOJEAWORJAWGJD

idk if this is bad, im currently in the library @ school so like, idk idk idk. i've been so busy with school n other stuff ): I hope yall have been good!!! I've been getting asked to update and i finally had the urge and time to write :) so heres a chapter of hs!! a chapter of my privatefearless ff, Polaroids, will be out in the next week since i've been getting asked to update it :)

thank u for stickin w me!! <3

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