Only For You

Eight.// Christian

July came around and I didn't plan on getting out of bed soon,

so I just laid there more and more each day and finally I didn't get out of bed all together.

Echo came round to see me often and sat in bed with me , and just sat there with no words just us two.

" Esten moved to the really big Hospital in Canada. I thought you should know, " Echo whispered through the cracks in her voice.

Echo laid her hand on my shoulder and just stared at my blue wall where all my pictures used to be.

" Why did you destroy your walls? They were so pretty..." looking down at the bed sheets , Echo cried a little.

" I did it because it reminded me of Esten. I couldn't live in here and be reminded that she's gone away , and I can't forgive myself Echo.".

I turned to her with such gloom and distraught in my eyes and she didn't know how to look back at me so she didn't.

" What her mom did was not right, at all and you know that. Telling you to leave like that, if I was her Mom i'd let you stay."

Echo said leaning into my chest for a hug and I put my arm around her and held her close.

" You knew Esten more than I did, you knew how much of a fight she was living in and I didn't even know that much .
I was just that boy that saw who she was and never stop believing in her. "

I told Echo pausing because I couldn't accumulate all the tears that formed in my eyes.

I really did wonder how she was doing, spending the same nights I was, staring at the black plain ceiling wishing to get out , just roam free.

I'll never know. - CA.

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Eight // Esten
It has almost been a month since I last saw Christian,

and my heart is becoming tiny and weak and I just wish I could go back to the way we were, I was.

Its july 28th and school starts back soon for Christian, and I miss him so much and I just want to lay under the stars with him , that would be nice.

My nurse came in and gave me my meds but I tossed them into the trash and stared out the window.

" But Ms. Coswaall , you need to take them. If you don't your weight will drop and you will be stuck on a ventalatior, and that means you can't breathe on your own."

She explained to me and fished my meds out of the trash and placed them on the table.

She left and I took them and resumed looking out the window,

" When will I get out of here?"

Who am I kidding I'm talking to myself , and I had no one.

Mother stopped coming to see me and got placed into another job and married a man named Allen Flynn and he has two kids.

I doubt they'll come see their completely nut house big step sister.

I laid in bed and I just sighed really loudly and ate some food and looked out the window.

I tossed and turned in bed and finally I ended up facing the door way and a woman with blonde hair appeared and walked in.

" Esten dear, hi this is Mrs. Akridge I came to talk to you about Christian. Your mom doesn't have to know I was here." She spoke.

I sat up in bed and crossed my arms, and stared at her.

" I thought you told him that I was basically dying. "

I said to her while she moved around in her seat .

" I never said that , I said that he should try and talk to some new girls, and that you wouldn't be the same girl he had come to know."

She looked at me and just became quiet really quickly.

I did what I always did when I was afraid which was look away .

" why didn't you bring Christian up here? He would love to see me."

I said to her playing with the scrapbook he made.

" he lays in bed and writes music and drinks tea and when I ask him to go out and make friends he says ' Not without Esten' and I can't force him to move."

she said back and got up and looked around my room .

" Then bring him here. I may actually finally know what love is, your son taught me that ."

I explained to her but she didn't want to listen.

" Christian is going to move on and I will make sure of that , I hope you do get better or not. Doesn't matter to me. Ask Christian." She left and closed my door.

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* Mrs. Coswaall's wedding didn't include Esten .*