my bestfriend's brother ✔️

17

A tap on the shoulder is what have brought me back to reality, pulling out of my train of thoughts as I locked eyes with a worried yugyeom. "You okay, kook?" He whispered, glancing briefly at me to agoid being caught by our professor.

I tried all my strength to force a smile and nod my head. "Just tired." He eyed me skeptically, his brows slightly arched and his head tilted to the side like he was examining me. I tried my best not to let my smile falter and soon, he gave up and just sighed.

I sighed on the inside as well. This day has been worse than I've anticipated. I couldn't focus nor even being myself to listen to whatever the lesson is. My mind would always wander to that certain boy— the same boy who broke my heart. I hate how I still long for him even how painful and broken loving him has brought me. No matter how much I try, I couldn't bring myself to hate him. Instead, I'm hating myself. I hate myself for being stupid, for not being good enough and for being just a child.

Maybe if I was older Jimin would love me the same way. If I was more attractive and much better than who I am now, maybe he'd be crazily in love with me like how I am to his. If I weren't stupid and so desperate, maybe he'd never break me.

I shook those thoughts away. This day isn't going so well for me. Taehyung forced me to stay at home and rest. I know he just wants me to rest from all the bullshits going on in my life, to recover from the fact that his brother cheated on me just three days ago, but I've lived through shit my whole life, what's changed?

There was no need for explaining. The fact that Jimin never ran after me that day was a proof itself. He never even dared to call or text me. He never even bothered to apologize. And it hurts because I was hoping he would.

"Okay enough with your shits, kook. What's wrong?" I felt yugyeom nudged me on the ribs. He had a stern look on his face, fiddling his pen against his fingers as he waits for me to speak.

I chuckled and flicked his forehead. "Idiot, I'm really fine. I just didn't get enough sleep last night." I lied, turning away from him to look down on my book and pretend to be listening to whatever the teacher was lecturing on.

"Jungkook," he called in a cold voice, sending shivers down my spine. I hummed as a response when I felt a hand on top of mine. "You're crying," he said, the same time a teardrop fell on top of my book, making me gasp.

"I caught something in my eye." I laughed. "I'm not crying, why would I cry?" Yeah, why the fuck would I cry? It's not like I was cheated on by the one person who I desire. It's not like I'm broken. Why would I cry?

Oh right, I am.

"Jungkoo—"

I didn't even let him finish and abruptly stood up and rushed outside, ignoring the anger laced in our professor's voice as he called my name. By the time I reached outside, tears were cascading hungrily against my cheeks. I could feel my heart tighten as I ran my way out the school.

My phone beeping wild against my pocket as I wiped tears after tears, not taking a single second to stop from running. It was then when taehyung came into view. He was standing by the front gate, his freshly cooked lunch box in hand with a huge grin plastered on his face.

His smile faltered when his eyes locked with mine, dropping the box as his eyes widen at the sight of me, unconciously dropping his lunch box and rushed his way to cup my cheeks. "It's okay." He said, pulling me in for a hug. "It's okay, kookie." He caressed my hair.

"It hurts, tae." I whimpered against his neck.

I feel pain, but it was a different kind of pain. It was the kind of pain that consumes you and destroys you. I feel heavy, desolated and lifeless. I can't help but wonder where did I go wrong? did I ask for to much? What did I do to deserve such punishment when all I did was love him. Am I really that undeserving of such masterpiece? Why can't he love me?

"Shhh, it will be okay." Taehyung whispered. "I'm here, I won't leave you kookie."

I should be mad. I should be angry at him. But I'm too broken to even be mad at him. I love him so much to even hate him, not even a bit. I've fallen too deep to even care of how much an asshole he is and how much of a dick he just is. I'm in pain, suffocating and probably dying inside, yet I couldn't help but hope that he'd come and explain, apologize and kiss my tears away.

Would it be a sin if I say I long to lock arms with instead of taehyung? is it bad that I hoped that it was Jimin standing by the front gate instead of him?

"Come on, I'll send you home." I heard my bestfriend sigh, grabbing me by the hand and lead me out the gates, picking his lunch box on the process. "I'm really sorry, kookie." I heard him whisper.

"Why are you apologizing? It's not your doing." I sniffed.

"But it's my brother's." He retorted. "I should've just told you directly. It's all my fault. I'm sorry." his voice was low and sad, head slightly bowed down.

"It's okay, atleast you tried." I gave him a small smile, squeezing his hand. Taehyung smiled back, his boxy grin slightly on display. "Thank you, tae."

He was silent at first before shaking his head. "No, don't thank me, kookie-ah." he looked away. "I didn't do anything. I just watched you get hurt and expected you to realize yourself. I'm really sorry. I'm such an idiot, forgive me?"

I nudged him by the shoulder. "You're so dramatic, shut up." I laughed, earning a nudge back from him, laughing along.

"I'm so lucky to have you as my bestfriend, tae."

"Yeah,"