Desire. Draco Malfoy.

Distractions??

Draco

It's been months

I stopped talking to her. I stopped looking at her in class. I stopped. I stopped it all.

Except every Friday on my free day I would walk down to the library and just watch her read. For hours.

Last Friday I had to leave early because I almost started crying. Can't get any weaker then that.

It's just everything is so stressful. It's been months. O.W.L.S are coming up to determine what N.E.W.T courses I will be permitted to take and figure out what job I should pursue. So in all reality I don't have to try hard because I know exactly what's going to happen to me whether I like it or not.

But I have a shit ton of homework because it's fifth year.

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GUYS FYIIIIIIII BEFORE I HAD IT SO THAT THEY WERE IN THEIR FORTH YEAR BUT I CHANGED IT FOR THE GREATER GOOD. IT WILL JUST HELP THE PLOT I PROMISE. IM SORRY IF THERE WAS/IS ANY CONFUSION. BUT THEY ARE NOW IN THEIR FIFTH YEAR. AGAIN SORRY.
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I am now a prefect and a part of the inquisitorial squad. I have been busying myself with Harry Potter. In all reality I don't hate him anymore I just need to be distracted and he does just that.

Anyways.

I know I made the right choice with Ana but. I still feel horrible. I think she hates me. I know she hates me. She moved seats in all of the classes we had together. Pretty regularly she leaves for 7 days. It's the weirdest thing ever but I really do try to not worry about it. I shouldn't worry about her.

I shouldn't care about her.

Grief, anyways. 

Only a few more days until June and then we will take the O.W.L.S and then it's my birthday and then I get the scores back and then we leave. And it could be the last time I see Ana and I'm dreading it. I don't want to leave, no, I feel like I have to stay. Because as soon as I leave things might change and I'm not ready for that.  Maybe nothing will change but it's the possibility that scares me.

Currently Ana isn't here. Again. But what ever.

Today is Thursday and I'm sick of everything. I don't want to talk to anyone, I hate everything. I hate myself.

God what's the point in trying anymore.

No one cares.

I don't even care.

Or maybe I care too much.

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Hey you guys, I just wanted to say sorry updates have been taking forever, life's pretty hectic am I right? Lol anyways.

I love all of your comments they make my day so thank you. I also wanted to say sorry about how short they have been? I'll try and make them longer in the future. Love you bunches
-CRM