The Broken Girl (Jack Johnson)ON HOLD

4-Disenchanted

(Fix You by Coldplay)

-Lola-

I had done it again and it was horrible, but at the same time I couldn't stop. I made four cuts.
I cleaned myself up and put on a BMTH long sleeved sweater and some shorts. I got another text from my dad. He had a over night shift now and told me to cook some pizza.

I was still hanging stuff up, covering my ugly white chipped wall. I placed up posters of my bands, I placed my drawings up, I even put up a calendar to cover it all up. I placed my pencils, pens, markers, etc all in my drawers in my desk. I also placed my notebooks and art books inside it.

I had a HUGE passion for writing and drawing. My mom thinks it's just some phase since I'm EMO, but I had a huge passion since I was 9, when I read my first poem book. It may have been small poems from a book called 'Where The Sidewalk Ends' but I suddenly realized I write better with that kind of style and than on I just wrote things and I guess I was really good.

When I got to middle school they had this poem contest thing, I always got second or first place. I started to draw at the same time because I would always doodle when I think of words for my poems.

Anyways I've been writing and drawing since I was 9. I also can play the guitar and piano. A little bit of the bass. Music is a huge influence on my life and I guess bands have given me the hope that the world may not be so bad and that I can live another day here.

I go back to unpacking my room to feel more at home but I knew deep down that I was indeed not home and I won't be home for another five months.

So story time....

When I was around 8 my parents got divorced because my mom cheated but she won me in court and I had to live with her and her new boyfriend in LA.

I lived there since then and now my mom knew I had issues with my dad so she wanted me to 'fix' them with him and so she gave my dad five months with me and that meant I had to leave right after Christmas break and get over here.
Me and dad had issues because I kinda shut him out of my life after a really bad incident when I was 10.

For a week in the summer, my mom allowed me to go and visit my dad who just in to a new house far away from our old one.
So he wasn't very nice and always drank and smoked and got angry, but I always left before things got bad.

He got really drunk one night and woke me and dragged me down the stairs and right away started to get all emotional and then snapped at me and slapped me really hard on the face when I asked if you could go back to bed.
He kept snapping at me and would slap me harder each time. He kept talking to himself rather than to me and would get all pissed if he thought of something bad. He kept talking about my mom and how she cheated and took all his money basically. He kept thinking that she was planning this for so long but I wasn't for sure that was true. He then shoved me against the wall and even broke a vase then he left me there and went to bed.

I told my mom the next morning and she came to pick me up later on that day.

So me and him don't get along and I will never love him. My mom keeps telling me I'll regret ever fixing my issues with him in the future. I don't love him and when I turn 18 I'll just shut him out permanently and never worry about this train wreck I call a dad ever again.

I looked at my alarm clock now. 7:20pm.

I got up from my now clean bed and went down to the kitchen to start the pizza.

~£~£~£~

My pizza was finally done and I grabbed a piece, right at that time I heard a knock on the front door. Who could that be?

I walked over to the door. Who would come here at 8 pm? Did my dad have friends coming over?

I twisted the door knob and opened it.

I nearly cussed as I saw who it was. That fucking blonde!

Why does he keep appearing out of nowhere?!??!?

He had a stack of envelopes in his hand and he looks surprised to see me.
"You live here?" He questioned.

"No, I snuck in and made myself pizza." I said sarcastically.

He sighed awkwardly and hands me the stack of envelopes.
"They keep giving us your mail." He murmurs, while not giving me eye contact.

"T-thanks." I replied and placed them on the table by the door.

"I better go." He makes his way to his house but I stopped him.

"You're gonna tell everyone, aren't you?" I couldn't help but ask. He turned around and gave me a puzzled look.
"What?"

"You know what! Oh the EMO girl cuts and let's go and bully her!" I say furiously, as I inch my way towards him.

He stops me by holding my shoulders. I stopped and stare at his chest with a sad expression. It was quiet for a few seconds until he placed his finger under my chin and had me look up at his bright blue eyes. I could've sworn that I saw something.

"Listen, I know you don't want that. I wouldn't even do that, but I'm not gonna back out of this." He says softy but it confused me at what he said.

"What?" I asked. He exhaled through his nose. He grasped my arm and pulls me inside my house. He shuts the front door and turns to me, grabbing my sweater sleeve and pulling it down. Exposing my cut up wrist.

"I'm not backing out of this!" He gestured to my wrist.
"I know you don't know me but I can't just let a pretty girl like you and go and hurt herself."

"I'm not pretty." I stated.

"Is that all you just heard from me? That's not the point. The point is I'm your new best friend and I'm gonna help with this." He explained. I scoffed at this ridiculous shit.

"Go ahead. Try and fix me. But it's gonna be hard. I'm just a shattered mirror and you'll just hurt yourself more as you try to fix the broken mirror." I scoffed.

"That's fine. I'm fine with getting a little messy, you can't just leave the glass on the floor anyways." He countered my saying.

"Yeah, you end up throwing away the glass pieces because it's useless to fix it now." I smirked at him.

"You're not useless. You are easy to fix. I have plenty of glue and tape."

"But it's easier to replace the mirror. Instead of putting all the pieces back together and making it look worse than before. Why go through all the trouble?"

"Because sometimes you just can't throw something so great and wonderful away. No matter how old or run down they may seem, it's still good in my eyes." Whoa! He was good at this.

I looked away from his eyes and down at my wrist. He was still holding onto it.
Maybe it won't be that bad to have a friend like him.

Are you kidding me?! This boy is just trying to get into your pants. He doesn't care about you and you know that. He's just gonna leave you and tell everyone that the lonely EMO girl cuts.

I sighed as the voice kept taunting me and making me horrible.

"Please just let me in." He says softly, while gripping the sides of my face now. I brought my eyes up to his. He had this look in his that made me change my mind.

For a quick second it was like looking into heaven and I let out a frustrating groan and spoke.

"Want some pizza?"

He smiled at my offer and let go of my face.

"Hell yeah!" He chirped and I led him to the kitchen where the pizza was.

For once I actually went against the voices inside my head. It felt somewhat good.

Could this boy actually fix me?

Nah!