Don't Let Me Push You Away (Simon Minter Fanfic)

Chapter 9

Simon closed the distance between us in two large strides. His lips crashed into mind before I could even figure out what he was doing. It was like the air from my body completely disappeared from the contact. The way our lips molded into each other felt too perfect, too completely normal. It wasn't like Harry's kiss. No, with Harry it was his lips that felt good, and with Simon's, it was ours.

My legs walked backwards while his moved forward, making my back hit against the wall. Both of his hands were on either side of my face as his mouth worked against mine torturously slow. His tongue slid across mine. I never tasted something so sweet. And the way his body pressed up against mine, hovering over me with his tall frame, making me feel safe for just a moment. This is what I was afraid of, feeling something. Simon was opening up doors that I kept trying to lock up forever.

His hair felt soft twisted around my fingers as I pulled him impossibly closer. My mind was telling me to run, this would never end well, that I knew for sure. But my heart didn't want to hear it, it wanted Simon to keep his lips on mine. It wanted him to graze his teeth against my bottom lip again and again until it was numb. It wanted to crawl into bed with him and see how far we could go.

With that thought I somehow managed to pry myself away from the blond boy. We were both breathing heavy. Simon's lips were swollen and a deep, harsh red. I'm sure mine looked exactly the same.

"Why'd you do that?" I whispered breathlessly.

"Because I knew you were too scared to."

"You shouldn't have, Si." With that I wretched open the door and darted straight to my room despite my name being called. This was all so fucked. How could I have managed to kiss Harry and Simon all within the three weeks I've been here? Everything was getting all mixed up and I had no idea how to stop it. It was a little too far gone to be fixed. On top of that Aaron hadn't been letting up with the threats and if I got any more stressed my head might have exploded.

"JJ I don't know what to do anymore." I huffed, plopping down in a chair across from him. After a night of my brain being on full overdrive I figured my best friend would have some wise words of wisdom u needed to hear.

Currently he was busy on his phone, barely paying me any mind. "About what?"

"I kissed Simin last night. Well, he kissed me, but I let him."

That got his attention, " holy shit. Good for you, how was it?"

"Great, but that's not the point. I kissed Harry too and I think he really likes me."

"I'm sure they both really like you Kells, you're fucking beautiful and your personality isn't that bad, I guess," he teased. "You really should figure out who you want though, don't lead them on."

"I don't want either of them! It makes things too complicated. Why do they have to like me? I told you, there's no one out there for me. Everyone leaves eventually so I'm going to just avoid that part."

JJ looked like he was about ready to slam my head into the table. I didn't blame him, of course he didn't understand why. He never went through what I went through, which I'm happy about, I wouldn't with the life I had on my worst enemy. Well, maybe Aaron. In the end, they are his friends and I shouldn't have been so careless. I should have told Harry when I got the chance what the score was. Simon knew, he just didn't care, that wasn't my fault. He had this delusion that everything would work out back that was unrealistic. He was just a hard headed boy who wanted to fix a broken girl.

"Then just stop leading both of them on. They're great guys and I'm not letting you fuck them over, you should know how badly that hurts."

My head fell into my hands, "I know, okay? I'll fix this, sorry for thinking my best friend might have some advice instead of screaming at me. Don't you think I wish I wasn't fucked up either."