Dirty Little Secrets (Demily fanfic) [REWRITE IN PROGRESS]

Chapter 21: Out Of The Woods

Chapter 21: Out Of The Woods

6 months later

Emily POV

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Things around the BAU have almost become normal again. The sadness you feel when you walk into the office has lifted, and the new members of the team make things a little easier. Of course the memories will always be here, and the people who were, and are like family to us will never leave our hearts. Derek has been cleared for work, and today is his last day off. Everyone took the day off today so we could finally go through Spencer and JJ's things. It's finally time.

Will and Henry have been coping well since JJ's passing, but something still feels broken. When we arrive at the house, I am surprised to see that Henry is helping his father go through some boxes. He's grown up to be a bright young kid. He will go far in this world.

"Hey Will, find anything interesting yet?" I ask happily as I lean down next to the box he's going through. "I found some old photo albums in a box in the closet. You can go through them if you want." He says, pointing to the stack of books on the couch. I sit down and begin to flip through the pages. One is dedicated to her marriage, one to Henry, another to the team. Then I come across last album. The least dusty of them all. I wipe away the little dirt that covers the beautiful gold lettering underneath. I can't help but smile as go through the pictures of JJ and I. We were closer than sisters.

"You should keep these." I say as I hand Will a few of the albums. "Thanks Emily."

"Hey Aaron," I say as I approach him. "You should put this on a shelf in your office." He smiles as he looks through the pages. "That's a great idea. I will."

Will, Henry, the team and I go through most of JJ's things. We decide that the majority should go to charity. It's nearly 3pm, and while the team finishes up at JJ's, I make my way over to Spencer's apartment to get a head start.

I slip the key into the lock but as I enter the familiar scent of Lysol wipes and sanitizer is absent. I breathe in deeply, taking in the memory of the appartment. I start to go through drawers, finding mostly paperwork and case files that will be brought back to the office. I look over to Spencer's collection of books. The bookcase runs high as the ceiling and I know he wouldn't want them after his demise. Surely, since our first connection was over books, he'd want me to have them. I grab a box from the pile Aaron dropped of earlier and start to place the books inside.I start off taking them one by one, but I'm getting nowhere on this huge shelf. I grab a pile of books from a middle shelf and end up dropping them on the floor.

"Shit." I mutter to myself as I scramble to pick up the books. I pick them up and place them in the box gently. I notice that one of  the books is propped open slightly, as if there were something inside. I pick it up and realize that this was the last book Maeve gave to Spencer before he died. I open it up to find a thinck envelope. My name written on the front in cursive lettering. I move the letter and find Maeve's handwriting on the cover page. The Thomas Merton quote Reid held dear to his heart. His version of I love you. I place the book in the box and fold the top of it closed.

I sit down on the couch and open the envelope, revealing the pages of detailed words. Sentence after sentence brings tears to my eyes and I knew I had been right all along. Spencer knew what he was doing and why. His letters fit together to write the perfect goodbye, and I know that I will always hold this close to my heart. I will never show anyone his most inner thoughts before he died. He left this letter for me, and me alone. He knew I'd understand.

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I walk through the door and Derek is waiting for me. "How was cleaning out Reid's place?" He asks innocently. I drop my purse to the floor and wrap my arms around him, pressing my face close to his chest. "I'm sorry Em." He says as he holds me tight. "Me too." 

But for the first time in years, I feel like I'm finally out of the woods.