Forever Waiting (Kim Jonghyun x reader)

Chapter 11: ♫ love sick ♫

"We need to talk...please"

"No" I said quietly and tried closing the door again but he was too strong and ended up walking in my house.

Sighing I closed the door after him "5 minutes then get out."

"Thanks... Can I sit?" Jonghyun asked to which I just shrugged and kept my eyes down as I sat on a chair near the sofa.

"I...I want to apologise..." Jonghyun said but I didn't respond and he just continued "I'm sorry for kissing you that night... I'm sorry for what I did afterwards...I'm sorry for telling Siran something that was so personal... And I'm sorry that she abused it..."

I kept my mouth shut and continued looking down as I kept track on the time. 'Just 2 minutes to go.'

"[y/n]? [y/n] please say something..."

"I'm sorry that you're sorry about the kiss. I'm sorry that I enjoyed the kiss and felt like I was the most special person in the world. I'm sorry for being stupid that I have a crush on my once used to be best friend. I'm sorry that I trusted that person to tell them such things, I'm sorry that in reality I'm really nothing to them for them to abuse it. I'm sorry that I apparently 'meddled' in that person's relationship with his girlfriend. I'm sorry that I had to pay the price for me 'meddling' in the relationship because I 'tried getting' him away from his girlfriend. I'm sorry that, that lie helped him keep his girlfriend and I'm sorry that you had to come to my house to apologise for what he did." I said quietly as I kept looking down. Standing up I went to door and held it open "5 minutes are up...get out."

"[y/n]... Is that how you-" Jonghyun started but I cut him off.

"5 minutes are up. Get out." This time I said it more seriously as I looked up at him with a stern gaze "oh and don't ever approach me again, I don't want your girlfriend after me."

Jonghyun stayed quiet before sighing and leaving. Closing the door behind him and locking it I fell on my knees as I cried. I didn't know how long I was crying for but the sun was already setting. Standing up I wiped my last few tears away before going up to my bed as I was exhausted.

Unfortunately for me Sunday went by quickly and I was now in front of my school on a Monday. I wasn't in the mood to talking to someone so I silently went to my class and waited in the hallway.

Classes went by slowly for me and instead of spending lunch at the cafeteria I was in the library with my earphones I really didn't want to socialise with anyone. Luckily lunch ended and I didn't bump into anyone. I sat near the back in Biology, I tried focusing but I really couldn't be bothered to and fortunately school came to a end.

Most days went on like that, I didn't see Jonghyun much which actually benefited me I soon started feeling better and happier, I started socialising again with Micha and the others and Taemin really helped me with everything. I'm so grateful towards him, I wish I could repay him by actually giving him a chance but I just couldn't. It wouldn't be fair on him. Everything was all good though until one lunchtime.

"Hey guys" a too familiar voice greeted.

"Hey hyung" Kibum responded bluntly.

"I know it's been a long time but you guys are still my friends" the person responded as he sat right next to me. I could tell Taemin was getting uncomfortable by him sitting next to him but didn't say anything and just let the sass King Kibum deal with it.

"Mm sure" Kibum replied sarcastically "what do you really want Jonghyun?"

"I just want to be close to you guys again... Like how we all used to be" Jonghyun pouted at Kibum's tone.

"You've got a lot of mending to do if you want to be close to all of us, just how it used to be" Jinki responded calmly.

"I know and I will hyung" Jonghyun nodded.

"He means a lot Jonghyun. A lot." Minho responded in a scarily calm tone.

I fidgeted with my hands as I was feeling extremely uncomfortable with the conversation. Taemin noticed and he hesitantly took one of my hands to lightly rub circles on the back of it.

"I know I know, can we start later today? We can all go out and hang out and I mean all of us" Jonghyun said with puppy eyes.

"I swear you have a date with Siran later today?" Kibum rose a eyebrow making Jonghyun smile which clearly made Taemin uncomfortable as he moved away slightly.

"I cancelled now please?"

"I don't know Jonghyun..." Jinki started off.

"Please hyung please?"

"Okay but I don't know if /all/ of us can do later today?" Jinki asked everyone. Surprisingly everyone was free today including Micha. I was the only one who didn't respond.

"Are you free [y/n]?" I jumped slightly hearing him say my name. If I used my voice I knew I would stutter so I just nodded my head slightly "it's settled then! I'll meet you all after school!" Jonghyun beamed before standing up to go somewhere, or to someone.

"Are you sure you'll be okay with going later today?" Taemin asked me in a soft voice.

I only nodded and gave him a small smile "I'll be fine."

I'll be fine, I'll be fine. Will I?