Every String Attached | GirlxGirl

Chapter Twenty Three

"Come on, get out of bed."

Shawn woke to Chance's hands on her shoulders, shaking her awake. She'd been dreaming of a castle; it was barely lit, and she was uncomfortably alone. Although she usually was by herself in these dreams, last night, she was terrified.

Terrified of being alone.

Reality hit her as soon as she was fully awake, and without missing a beat, she collapsed into tears. Chance held onto her shaking body as if it would soothe the hurricane that had erupted.

"I can't. Chance, I have never—in my life—been so upset," Shawn murmured.

"I know, babe. I know. She really did a number on you, but you know what?"

Shawn pulled her head back, wiping her nose with the back of her hand. "What?"

"It doesn't matter. She is one person in your life—not your entire life itself. You'll pick yourself back up. Maybe you'll fall for someone who works at McDonalds, who's blind."

It was a relief when Shawn broke out in laughter, and surprised her when it felt much better than crying did.

Sitting next to Chance, with her head resting on her shoulder, Shawn was incredibly grateful that Chance hadn't once said "I told you so," or in any way rubbed it in her face that she had been right about York, and about their relationship overall.

But really, who could have predicted this? Even what Chance said hadn't been right. Chance had been fearful of Shawn breaking York's heart—not the other way around.

It didn't seem fair. Their relationship was perfect. Their chemistry was perfect. Everything was perfect.

Maybe it was because Shawn had mentioned Hunter that night. Or maybe, York had a point, and Shawn was being weighed down by the people and the places lingering in her past, and to have a successful future, she was going to have to sort them out.

When Thomas called her that morning, she ignored it, promising herself she would call him later. She was in no mood or state to be on the phone pretending that she was alright, when she clearly was not.

Shawn realized that this was exactly how Chance felt after her short relationship with Nathan ended. Even though it was, in fact, short, it had meant something. It had meant everything to Shawn. And now it was over.

As many times as those words ran through her mind, Shawn could not comprehend the fact that she could no longer send York a text message when she was bored, or go to Starbucks to see her. The things she didn't even know she had were gone, and she didn't know how to get them back.

After two days of nagging from Chance, Shawn finally pulled herself out of bed to shower. She was sick of laying around and doing nothing other than 1. Pitying herself, and 2. Trying to understand what had gone wrong. Chance suggested trying to work out a plan to mend things with York and start over. This was, essentially, her attempt at a challenge. But Shawn didn't have the energy, nor the means to complete it.

After the initial shock of the cold water, Shawn stood in the shower for close to an hour, with her eyes shut and head down.

Realization hit her the hardest then. She had never, ever felt so heartbroken. Nothing had ever hurt her this much.

She couldn't explain it to herself, nor to Chance. Her best friend had prompted her to talk about it, but really, how do you carry a conversation you know absolutely nothing about?

Was this how Hunter felt?

Upon this thought, Shawn immediately stopped the shower, standing in the centre of the bathtub and listening to the water fall from her body.