Victim of Circumstance | UNDER RIGOROUS EDITING

Chapter 3 - Clingy & Dotty

||Pius||

You know, there’s always that time in an individual’s life where they just have that foreboding feeling that predicts or somewhat anticipates what’ll happened in the future through bodily actions and reactions. Bodily actions that act like warning agents through piddling hints of information it drops.

Just like how I know—deep down in my heart—how totally screwed I’m.

As of now, I’ll do anything—absolutely anything—to wipe off the grave disappointment and hurt caked on Xavier’s face. I don’t like it when he’s looking down on me or when I disappoint him with my actions. But even so, this has nothing to do with him. He must butt out and mind his own business because I’m not sharing this with him or anyone. But what’s there to share if he already knows the truth. The truth that has the power to destroy me and I don’t only mean it figuratively.

The question is, if he knows how many people do? How long till I’m completely doomed and done for and whatever that my grandparents did to cover the truth is revealed. What I did was gruesome and evil. Evil to the point of no return. I forced or more like imposed myself on her. Threaten and coerce being the perfect word choice. If the authorities catch a wind of this then there’s no going back. At least not for me. I forced her. She didn’t want, but I made her do it and what result did it beget?

Sigh!

How did my life get so fucked up? So… twisted and convoluted. Even for me that’s living the life. I don’t have any control to any aspect of my life. Yes, I act arrogant and what-what but that’s beside the point. I don’t know what people think I’m. More especially what girls think I’m? A golden sex trophy or what? Yes, I know I’m pleasing to the eye by reason of conformity, both form and aspect/appearance. If I was some egocentric prick, I might’ve added irresistible to the mix but unfortunately I’m not.

Wink!

That doesn’t mean I don’t know the power I possess. The controlling influence my smile has, that’s enough to make girls go jello, swoon and drool over me. I can and do get girls at the snap of my fingers. They’re like fucking leeches, so desperate to get a taste of me and my big boy and by big boy I mean the guy situated between my legs which by the way has earned quite a reputation.

A soft sigh escapes my lips as I make a stop at another traffic stop, lined with a queue of vehicles. It’s so fucking annoying. Just the fact we’ve been driving for almost thirty minutes and the drive to the Dine Inn is just less then fifteen minutes on a normal traffic free day.

I switch my gaze over to Xavier who just switched the radio on, finally lurching forward and turning into the main drive. I run a hand through my hair, frustrated. He didn’t even peek a glance in my direction. Not once. The brat is giving me the cold shoulder, totally disregarding my presence ever since we left the house. He just went mute the minute I refused to neither confirm nor deny his accusations. Why deny if I know it’s the truth and why come clean just to mix him up in my mess. Xavier is already hurt by my father enough and I don’t want to add that to his pile of things to worry about because knowing Xavier, he’ll wreck his brain worrying about me.

He is resting his head against the window, plausibly thinking. About what? You know what you dickhead something says from behind my mind.

“I didn’t know what else to do. It was the only sensible thing I could think—“

“Please tell me you’re shitting me right now,” he narrows his eyes at me. Well, good. At least I got him to look at me. “Because sensible is not the word you should be using. I might just be nine but I’m no idiot, okay? I know the difference between sensible, right and wrong. And what you did was downright wrong. Illegal and heartless even.” He mutters the last part and look away from me.