Bullshit

Chapter 9

My eyes were closed as I took a deep breath. I didn't want to look down at the ground before I fell, it qould be to scary and I wouls probably chicken out. This was it, this was the last day that I would be alive. One of the last breaths that I would ever breath, and I didn't know how I felt about it... I knew that every one else would be fine without me, but I couldn't help but feel sadness. 

Slowly I let my fingers slip from the bar that was holding me back, the only thing that was holding me up now was my heels on the patio. I took one last deep breath and lent my body forward a little, that was all it would need for me to fall. 

But before I could begin to fall from the sky, two pairs of strong arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me back onto the patio. I landed on my but and let out a small yelp at the sharp pain in my bottom.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" Oh god... I know that voice.

Very slowly I stood up and turned around until I was facing him. I winced at the angry and worried expression on his face. I gulped loudly and rubbed my arm awkwardly, refusing to meet his gaze. 

"H-hey Lou." I mumbled quietly.

"Hey?! HEY?! Thats all you have to say after you almost killed yourself?!" he shouted.

I winced at his loud voice and took in a deep shaky breath. Honestly I didn't think he would be this upset, I didn't even think he would be back in the hotel until later.

"Sorry." I whisoered

"You tried to kill yourself Harry! I don't think you understand how terrible that is! WHat were you thinking?!" He said, his voice quieter then before, but still loud.

"I-I don't know... I just figured no one w-would miss me th-at much." I told him.

Louis let out a sigh and before I knew it, I felt his arms wrapped around my waist, his face pressed in the crook of my neck. I was taken by surprise at first, but quickly wrapped my arms around him. I heard Louis let out a small sob and I could feel the tears on my neck. Was Louis... crying?

"L-Lou... you okay?" I asked slowly.

"You're so stupid." He muttered.

"What?"

Louis pulled back and wiped away his tears, looking me dead in the eye. 

"How can you think that no one would miss you. That /I/ wouldn't miss you." He exclaimed.

"I-I just... I mean. You hate me." I whispered.

Louis shook his head quickly and brought his hand up to my cheek.

"I could never hate you, never." He said softly.

My heartbeat was beating at a thousand beats per second, what was Louis saying? What did all of this mean?

"Lou..." I started, but Louis brough a finger up to my lip, stopping me from talking. 

"Just, just don't talk." he muttered.

I pulled Louis close to me again, enjoying the feeling of his wamr body pressed against mine. I don't care what happens in the future, I don't care if we go back to how we were. All I care about is now, and right now I have the love of my life in my arms, telling my how upset he would be if I died.

Surprisingly Louis hugged me back, going back to the same place he was just a minute ago. 

I don't know how long we stood there, just hugging on the patio. But how ever long it was, it wasn't enough time. A thousand years wouldn't be wnough time with Louis. Eventually Louis pulled away from the hug and gave me a weak smile. 

"Haven't done that in a while." He chuckled softly, wiping some of the extra tears away. 

I gave him a small nod in agreement and played with my fingers nervously. "Y-yeah."

"Harry... promise me never to do that again." he said seriously.

"I promise." I told him, even though I didn't know if I was going to keep that promise.

"Good, good." 

The silence was deafening, neither one of us said anything, not thatwe really knew what we were suppose to say in a situation like this. I bit my bottom lip and looked down over the patio again. I could have been on the ground down there by now. My broken body could have been splattered all over the pavement. There probably would be polce and witnesses standing around me. 

But no, here I was with Louis. And I don't care if he never talks to me again. Because now I know that he cares, and thats all I need. At least for now. 

Just then I heard the door opening and an Irish accent drunkenly singing. I let out a small chuckle and started walking inside, I heard Louis' footsteps following me into the hotel. 

"Lou... please don't tell them." I asked.

"Sure Haz, whatever you want." he smiled before walking into the living room

Did he... did he just call me Haz? I gulped ludly and looked down at the floor. What does this all mean?

The hug, him saying those things to me, calling me haz. Whats going on with Louis, Just weeks ago he was screaming at me and calling me a fag. And now... now it was almost like old times, almost.

I let out a deep sigh and followed Louis into the kitchen where a very drunk Niall was stumbling around while Liam was trying to make him calm down.

"Niall! Niall, no Niall your not allowed to go up there!" Liam exclaimed as Niall tried to fit into one of the cuboards. 

"I'M A CEREAL! NIALL O'S!" He giggled, actually managing to squeeze half his body in.

There was pasta and cereal boxes thrown on the ground by Niall to make more room.

"Ni, you're going to get youself hurt!" Liam shouted at him.

I covered my mouth to try and stop the giggles that threatened to come out, but I couldn't help it. A loud laugh erupted from my lips as I watched Liam try to get Niall down. 

Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at me, even Niall who was almost all the way in the cuboard now.

"Harry, did you just laugh?" Liam asked me.

"Yeah..." I trailed off, rubbing my arm.

It had been months since the last time I had luaghed, or even let out a small chuckle. I guess I could see why they were all surprised. But that didn't mean I liked it when they stared t me like that. Like I was some type of freak that they needed to investigate. 

"Can... can you stop looking at me." I mumbled. 

"Sorry Ha- JESUS NIALL PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON!" Liam shouted, trying to grab Niall from out of the cuboard. 

"I'm gonna go watch some telly." I said, walking into the living room.

"Kay, I'm going out lads. See ya later." Louis called."Oh and Harry, remember. I could never hate you." he whispered ebfore leaving the hotel.

I shook my head and sat down on the couch. This was all to confusing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There ya go my lovely readers!!! Hope you enjoyed the chapter and feel free to

Comment!

Vote!

Fan!

LUV YA!