Bullshit

Chapter 14

I finished putting the last plate in the dishwasher and closed it after adding the detegrent. Letting out a deep sigh I went and sat down on one of the dining table chairs, resting my head against the dark oak table. I was so exhausted, and yet I knew that I couldn't manage to go to sleep.

The clock read two-fifteen a.m, way to early for me to up. Especially considering that I had woke up earlier to get a flight here and not have to see Louis. But that very boy was the reason for all of my trouble. He was all that I could think about since I had boarded that plane. 

Lifting up my sleeve, I looked down at his name on my arm. Letting out a small smile. It really was such a beautiful idea, perfect to show Louis just how much I love him. But sadly, he thought that it just meant I was some type of pshyco. 

Quickly, I shook the thought out of my head. I don't need to be crying in the middle of the night, it might wake up mum. When I stood up from the chair the house begin to spin and small black dots spotted my vision. I wobbled slightly, having to catch my self on the table so that I didn't fall down.

I simply shrugged it off, eventually the house stopped spinning and my vision was clear again. This had been happenening a lot recently. My guess would be because of how little I've eaten. To most people, this would be a very big concern for them. But honestly, I don't mind getting light headed every now and then if it meant that I could be better for Louis. Anything for Louis. 

Letting out a deep sigh, I realized just how bored I was. What the hell am I suppose to do now? Its not like I can crawl into my mums bed and try to sleep, I'm not a little kid anymore. Maybe I should go for a walk? After all, no one would be out at this time of night. 

Nodding to myself I grabbed my coat and left the house as quietly as I possibly could. After all, a little walk never hurt anybody.

I stuck my headphones in my ears and looked down at the sidewalk, not really paying attention to where I was going. But I know the town well enough, even if I'm looking at the ground I won't get lost. 

As I was walking I thought about nothing, and everything. I thought about the band, how well they're going to do without me, and how much I miss being there with them. I thought about my mum, and how much I love her with all of my heart and how grateful I am for them taking me back in with open arms.  Because even though Louis doesn't love me, I know that my mum always will.

And Louis.

Of course I was thinking about him. When wasn't I thinking about Louis. He was the love of my life, the apple to my eye. My soulmate. But then again, all of those things are when the person loves you back, my sistuation was nothing like that. 

Chuckling softly I kicked a rock onto the road, watching as it skipped across the ashfalt, stopping right in the yellow centre line. There was nothing really funny about what I had thought, but laughing was so foreign to me that it had lost all of its apeal.

I had made it home as the sun began to rise, peaking over the tip of the horizen. My guess would be that it was barely five.

The house was silent as I walked inside, mum was still sleeping and Gemma had moved out with her new boyfriend. Sluggishly I walked up to my room, plopping myself onto the soft bed.

Very slowly my eyes began to close, thank god. I'm finally going to get some sleep.  Just as I could feel myself falling to sleep, my phone rang loudly. 

"Well shit." I mumbled to myself. 

The last thing that I needed right now was a phone call. I'll just ignore it.

But what if its one of the lads checking up on you? A little voice in my head said.

Nibbling on my bottom lip, I picked up my iPhone and pressed answer.

"Hello?" I said into the phone.

"Hey Harry, its Mike" He said enthusiastically. 

Really? Out of everyone who could have called me, it was this guy! Why couldn't it be Louis or Niall or Liam, even Zayn! Not that I hate him, but I thought that when we 'hung out' it would be over after that. I don't want a relationship. Well I do, but only with Louis. I don't want a relationship unless it is with Lou.

"Oh um... whats up?" I asked softly.

"I just wanted to check up and see how you were doing. I'm doing a story tonight on how you aren't on tour anymore." He told me.

Oh yeah, Mike works or Entertainment weekly. 

"People know about that?" 

"Well yeah, One Direction had a concert last night and you werent there." He explained.

I had totally forgot about that. I bit on my lip and felt tears forming in my eyes. The very first concert I had ever missed, and the boys didn't even bother to tell me about it. 

"So is that all you called me for, to tell me how I missed the concert?" I questioned, my voice cracking slightly. 

"No, of course not Harry. I really care about you, and I don't know whats bugging you but I'm here if you want to get anything off of your chest." he assured me.

Should I tell him? After all he was a reporter. He could tell people about our conversation. But then again, he wouldn't have any proof. Besides, its not like things could get any worse. 

"I-I love Louis." I whispered. "But he doesn't love me back."

There was silence, nothing but the sound of his breathing, and my exhelerating heartbeat. 

Suddenly he spoke up. "I'm sorry Harry... I never knew."

"Its  not your fault, its mine for being such an idiot and falling in love with him."

"So why aren't you on tour?" He asked.

"I did some stupid things and i put myself in danger... everyone thought it would be best if I stayed home."

"Harry... I wish I could say something to help you. But I can't, and I'm sorry. I have to go now, but if you need to tell me anything else, you have my number." He said before hanging up. 

That was weird. Why did he suddenly get off the phone like that?

I shook it off as no big deal and put my phone on the dresser, It was probably nothing.